is therapy helpful?

[PlatoPacks23]

feel lately just been in a huge rut and considering therapy. seems super expensive though and people around me aren't that into it and told me to "just think positive"/take more action and focus on work etc instead.


curious from people here what their experience is? lately been feeling super down and anxious/paranoid and feel like I need to do something


--
also haven't been in a relationship in a while which obviously I think would tremendously help with this, but if thats not in cards as of now feel like I need to do something

 

[BaronOfHair]

...people around me aren't that into it and told me to "just think positive"/take more action and focus on work etc instead.

For your sake, I(and I'm sure the rest of us)hope those same folks aren't into sneaking into zoos, biting the heads off of lemurs, then guzzling down every last quart of their blood, Packs... You seem unlikely to object, if they tell you to "Just go over the fence with us, and enjoy it, broaden your horizons, etc etc"

Psychotherapy can be extremely beneficial, IF

-You find a shrink who's been exhaustively trained in the empirically validated approaches https://www.wbur.org/onpoint/2018/01/21/talk-therapy Jump to the ten minute mark or so, and listen closely to everything Hoffman says. Be prepared to search HARD for a shrink like this

-You're curious about and eager to investigate the accuracy of your own thoughts and beliefs

 

[Bible_Belt]

Do you have hobbies and other interests that allow you engage with new people?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

For a short while but the clashing worldviews will lead to diminishing returns fairly quickly.

 

[CoolWave1331]

If you've experienced trauma at any point in your life that you can't shake & creeps up on you (even infrequently), yes you have to deal with it. It's taking away from your happiness and ability to be fully productive if you don't. Sometimes you can do this on your own, other times you will need professional help.

 

[Murk]

Extremely, I joined this forum a year after my mother died from cancer in 2016, diagnosed stage 4 and dead within a year. No siblings or father. I went off the rails, cocaine and alcohol mainly, smashed 35 girls in a calendar year and then some. Nothing really mattered. I have done 2 bouts of therapy, 1 when mum died, second when I started my business in 2020 and my ADHD ruined my motivation.

Go to therapy, better if its free but pay for it too. The smarter/high IQ you are, the more susceptible you are to your own mind, your worst enemy at times. Failing therapy, learn to talk. I speak regularly with friends about what's really going on, late paying bills, avoiding mail and calls, unhappy in career, inside your own head. We have all been there.

Older heads will tell you the mess I was in when I first joined this forum, I got a LOT of help from people here, hence I'll always stick around and chime in when I can.

EDIT: What I'd also add is to get your health in check, healthy eating, working out 3-6 times a week (6 times PPLPLL did it for me) and cut drugs, alcohol and tobacco. Get outside in the sunshine, Vitamin D does wonders.

 

[SW15]

Therapy doesn't help with some crucial aspects of dating and seduction.

Going to therapy will not increase a man's right swipe % on the apps. His DM response rate will also be unaffected by therapy.

It's unlikely that a man will go on more first dates as a result of therapy.

Therapy can be helpful for retention and extending interactions but has limited value in starting interactions/early phases.

 

[Aurora Demon]

Only if you find a good therapist. Having a bad therapist can make things worse.

 

[jhonny9546]

A man going to therapy to free himself from his problems sounds strange, don't you think?
After all, aren't we the masculine and strong ones who manage our problems and emotions in silence?

Just like our grandparents did.

It's attractive to see a thoughtful, silent man. He's masculine.

Is it also attractive to see a man who talks about his problems, who opens up, who shares his stories? I don't know, but not in my experience.

Anyway, does therapy really help?

Many men do it with their girlfriends/wives, and for some of them, the luckiest ones, a woman will be there to listen, to sympathize. A man would go to her and "ask for advice". And when there's a great woman behind it, the man benefits.
Also, there are some women who like to "fix problems" and will find a man with problems very attractive. But it's usually not worth it, and they turn out to be crazy after they've fixed you.

But how many of you will actually do it?

For example, I did it with my sister; I even tried with my mother, but I wasn't lucky. And this may have created a bias in me about having to "open up" to women.

So, I should consider that being silent, and carrying my problems with me, is better than talking about them with a therapist.

How does therapy really help a man?
Can it really help you overcome your problems, rather than facing them directly with willpower, so no words or stories, just actions and attempts?

 

[Thebestthereeveris]

feel lately just been in a huge rut and considering therapy. seems super expensive though and people around me aren't that into it and told me to "just think positive"/take more action and focus on work etc instead.


curious from people here what their experience is? lately been feeling super down and anxious/paranoid and feel like I need to do something


--
also haven't been in a relationship in a while which obviously I think would tremendously help with this, but if thats not in cards as of now feel like I need to do something

I got ripped, ****ed hot girls, and lived a generally active life where I solved my life problems. I became happier and no longer needed therapy. My past didnt matter. i was focused on my future.

 

[BPH]

A man going to therapy to free himself from his problems sounds strange, don't you think?
After all, aren't we the masculine and strong ones who manage our problems and emotions in silence?

Just like our grandparents did.

It's attractive to see a thoughtful, silent man. He's masculine.

Is it also attractive to see a man who talks about his problems, who opens up, who shares his stories? I don't know, but not in my experience.

Anyway, does therapy really help?

Many men do it with their girlfriends/wives, and for some of them, the luckiest ones, a woman will be there to listen, to sympathize. A man would go to her and "ask for advice". And when there's a great woman behind it, the man benefits.
Also, there are some women who like to "fix problems" and will find a man with problems very attractive. But it's usually not worth it, and they turn out to be crazy after they've fixed you.

But how many of you will actually do it?

For example, I did it with my sister; I even tried with my mother, but I wasn't lucky. And this may have created a bias in me about having to "open up" to women.

So, I should consider that being silent, and carrying my problems with me, is better than talking about them with a therapist.

How does therapy really help a man?
Can it really help you overcome your problems, rather than facing them directly with willpower, so no words or stories, just actions and attempts?

1 month 2 weeks old thread? Of course, it's @jhonny9546 reviving it.

I wouldn't have commented if you said something useful, but you basically wrote a long version of "maybe it helps, maybe it doesn't, what do you think?"

 

[CornbreadFed]

Yes, I feel like a lot of men need it

 

[Travel memoir21]

ChatGpt is a good source of mini therapy sessions if you can't afford sh1t. But a good step to that would be a Pastor at a church, maybe a priest or a Good friend you can vent to. There's several hotlines you can call up.

 

[MatureDJ]

Therapy doesn't help with some crucial aspects of dating and seduction.

Going to therapy will not increase a man's right swipe % on the apps. His DM response rate will also be unaffected by therapy.

It's unlikely that a man will go on more first dates as a result of therapy.

Therapy can be helpful for retention and extending interactions but has limited value in starting interactions/early phases.

Therapy for not getting romance/sex is simply a cope. Therapy is not going to make you a better PUA.

 

[corrector]

Venice-AI a great AI for therapy since it can create alter-ego stories where you are the player who gets the girl and make alter-ego images of you and your trophy girlfriend(s) or harem of women. Wtih Venice-AI, you are the prize and are a chick magnetic. If you don't believe in yourself, then you better believe in yourself now otherwise Venice-AI might find you and mind**** you until you do believe in yourself, grow balls and get confident with women.

 

[Gamisch]

Therapy doesn't help with some crucial aspects of dating and seduction.

Going to therapy will not increase a man's right swipe % on the apps. His DM response rate will also be unaffected by therapy.

It's unlikely that a man will go on more first dates as a result of therapy.

Therapy can be helpful for retention and extending interactions but has limited value in starting interactions/early phases.

Not true.

Whatever issue you have will eventually seep through into your dating life because bold everything is you. You are you 100%. Anger issues, attachment issues, trust issues, it's all you

If you wanna be with a woman 24 7 she will get all of you. You're talking about the initial pick up stage. That takes muscles swag a mouthpiece and some game. But beyond that stage it takes the real you.

A woman eventually will push you to the limit. On a level where if a man would do the same thing you would ...fill in the blanks. Better be mentally sound before engaging with women full time.

 

[zekko]

It's unlikely that a man will go on more first dates as a result of therapy.

Not only that, but if the therapist decides the OP has some serious issues, he might even say it's better not to go on any dates and focus on working on himself instead.

 

[justaroundthecorner]

I had issues in my life that I eventually dealt with because I sucked up the pain and did something useful with it - however I had ppl close to me to talk to (especially my father) when I needed it and tough time molded me into person with better understanding of life. I did not need therapy but I could have needed it.

If you do not have people that will listen to you, and you are down, it may be necessary for someone to help you get on your feets. If you don't have understanding close ones, therapy might be a good decision on the path to regain balance in your life.

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Plato,
At the end of the day,no matter how many faceless Robots or cloistered Priests you consult you will just have to pick up your bundle and get on with it...I used to date a Woman who bacame Supervising Psychologist for an area the size of some of your smaller States,I gave up on her because she was a Svexual deviate,a complete nutter!...Tempting as it might be to put your problems on a plate and hand them to someone else the Lord will help those as help themselves.

 

[SW15]

Therapy is not going to make you a better PUA.

I think that's a true statement. Psychology is limited on what it can do to help males in seduction.

Myron Gaines and Rollo Tomassi had a good conversation about this last year (see below). The redpill and PUAs are generally better at helping men with seduction matters than psychologists or counselors. Psychology and counseling struggles to address roadblocks in the initial seduction stages.

With a lot of initial seduction moving into the digital space, a man's first impression is going to be curated by pics/videos he posts on a swipe app or Instagram. That isn't the expertise of a psychologist or counselor. A man needs a good photographer and possibly a good lifestyle for that. He also needs a good ratio of Followers to Following on Instagram. He needs more Followers than accounts he's Following on Instagram and also a good quantity of Followers to be able to slide into the DMs.

if the therapist decides the OP has some serious issues, he might even say it's better not to go on any dates and focus on working on himself instead.

We must consider the personal attributes of the therapist.

If a man has a male therapist, he is likely an older, married man with a blue pill ideology on mating interactions.

If a man has a female therapist, his female therapist is a careerist, feminist who is likely either a heterosexual married female or a lesbian female.

These are not the right fishermen who can teach a man to fish.