"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Is she playing games?

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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GrowingPains

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Did you reply with the standard ... "Who's this?"

#textgame
Wouldn't it be a bit petty to respond that way? And then wouldn't OP be playing games too? I mean I get play the game but not games. Are they congruent?

I say it seems petty because if you were talking to her, you probably saved her number. And if you don't have it anymore, what's there to assume other than: he deleted my number (most likely) or he never saved it (not something I would do. I think having 3-4 unsaved numbers at a time is too much work to remember who I'm talking to). Now, assuming she assumes you deleted her number... That'd only make you look silly because you went through the trouble to delete a number (granted, it has been half a year) and usually I've only ever deleted numbers if I would never contact that person again (an ex, or I moved and it was a random number I pulled but never hung out with). My assumption would be insecurity if I thought someone went through the trouble to delete my number.

So, back on topic. If she is playing games... What games could she possibly be playing? You haven't spoken to her in a year so there's no investment, emotionally or monetarily, that would allow her to string you along at this point. I think a better stance to take is whether you want to smash or not. Are you still interested at this point? If you are, makeep her work a little bit. And if she starts working for it, put the ball in her court and see what she does. Actions.

I'd just assume she's pursuing you. She reached out half a year later.
 
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Mazer

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I personally wouldn’t even respond but if you decide to, then shoot her a text 2-3 days later and ask her to come over and catch up. I wouldn’t invest anything else.
 

marmel75

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OP was a troll splinter cell sent to infiltrate the board for a long period of time acting like a normal member before turning troll upon whatever trigger was given by his handlers...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sosousage

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OP was a troll splinter cell sent to infiltrate the board for a long period of time acting like a normal member before turning troll upon whatever trigger was given by his handlers...
Yes i saved this board with my sense of humor
 

MillionBillionaire

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Wouldn't it be a bit petty to respond that way? And then wouldn't OP be playing games too? I mean I get play the game but not games. Are they congruent?

I say it seems petty because if you were talking to her, you probably saved her number. And if you don't have it anymore, what's there to assume other than: he deleted my number (most likely) or he never saved it (not something I would do. I think having 3-4 unsaved numbers at a time is too much work to remember who I'm talking to). Now, assuming she assumes you deleted her number... That'd only make you look silly because you went through the trouble to delete a number (granted, it has been half a year) and usually I've only ever deleted numbers if I would never contact that person again (an ex, or I moved and it was a random number I pulled but never hung out with). My assumption would be insecurity if I thought someone went through the trouble to delete my number.

So, back on topic. If she is playing games... What games could she possibly be playing? You haven't spoken to her in a year so there's no investment, emotionally or monetarily, that would allow her to string you along at this point. I think a better stance to take is whether you want to smash or not. Are you still interested at this point? If you are, makeep her work a little bit. And if she starts working for it, put the ball in her court and see what she does. Actions.

I'd just assume she's pursuing you. She reached out half a year later.
Petty? Who gives a fvcuk... the whole point of "who's this" is to fish for information such as motive.

new to this?
 
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