"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Is she becoming attached too fast?

I

I'm Joe Dirt

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Chicago, IL
I've been going out with this girl (she is now my girlfriend) for about 2 or so weeks. It's the 3rd week now.

She is a very shy girl, the librarian introverted type. On our first date she wouldn't really even touch me and from her body language I could tell she didn't want to be touched either. Eventually we held hands the next time we went out, then she came over and we made out, and from there she got pretty touchy feely.

So I think she is being broken in.

But like today she showed up at my job and gave me a flower (it was a small flower) but didn't stay long since she was going to be late for work herself.

She calls me pretty much everyday, I never really have to call her anymore.

Is she becoming attached too fast? Cause to me it feels like she might be. Any advice on what to expect from this point on?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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I

I'm Joe Dirt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 7, 2005
Messages
667
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Location
Chicago, IL
I am enjoying myself, but I don't want to like get married anytime soon and while its exciting to be in a relationship its also kind of scary. I haven't been in a relationship since discovering the community.

Um, she was engaged before she said and was with that guy for four years, so yes I would say she was heartbroken before.
 
B

Boschy

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 28, 2006
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Location
Melbourne, Australia
Some get attached quickly, some take months. The next girl (if there is a next one, you stud, heh heh) could be the complete opposite. I agree with GGTW here and go with the flow, except keep in mind the guideline about trickle-feeding yourself to her. Don't tell her your whole life story just yet. I mean, how fast do you want things to move? You are in control. Forget the girl and her feelings for a minute...what does your personality dictate in this situation?

All said and done, if it ain't broken, don't fix it.
 
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