"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Is she afraid or just not attracted
- Thread starter karusel
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I honestly feel I'm loosing her. What do you think I should do/say?
Check Pugsley's progress with his to-be wife and understand my frustration... I feel what I'm experiencing is some sort of cold love and I don't like it at all. I don't expect her to cancel all her friends because of me, but I expect at least some sort of.. will to spend her available time with me or at least to return my calls, I mean, for christ sake, how much time does it take to call and say 'hi, I'm busy right now, call you later' or send an SMS while she's brushing her teeth before bedtime?? And don't say I should chill, there's absolutely nothing irrational in my thinking, besides, I am chilled, and worried.
Help?
Another !!!!UPDATE!!!!
She's sent me a 'let's meet tomorrow, there's something I need to tell you' SMS. Oh, is that so? As if I f* didn't see it f* coming f* miles away.
You think perchance I might salvage this with some cunning verbal strategy?
Right, move on.. But I'm still f* pissed off. Goddamnit.
Oh, and regarding the thread title question, it seemed to have turned out to be the latter, I'm afraid, but tomorrow I will however try to blame the first option in the conversation, but I have serious doubts of achieving any goddamn thing. Girls, f* you.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
MrCode
Senior Don Juan
Don't take offense I'm not trying to disrespect you, I'm just telling you like it is.
I think you need to read more of the DJ Bible and you could also benefit from some of David DeAngelo's material (Double Your Dating...look it up on Google.)
Just based on your posts here you seem to exude insecurity and obviously have a serious case of one-itis with this girl. Your only hope to salvage anything with her is to forget about her for a few weeks and meet some other girls. Always date at least two women until the one you like the most asks to be exclusive. In my case I prefer four or five girls at a time.
NewMan
Master Don Juan
Quit calling her.
Date other women.
Where I'm from it's quite unusual to be datig more than one girl at a time, and the term 'exclusive girlfiend' is for me invented by and used by Americans, also, since I live in a small city (although state capital) it is difficult not to go to those few most popular places for a date and odds are (think of smalltown) one might be seen by other 'candidates', which probably would not be a good thing.
However, I will very (very, very) seriously consider the idea.
MrCode
Senior Don Juan
I actually joke about it a bit with the girls I see ("you are girl number six in my dating queue") and so far it hasn't caused me any problems.
Believe me, if a girl thinks you are seeing other girls and the other girls like you, it will make her feel more attracted to you.
Kitty Kats Kompete.
Now I'm in a phase trying to fool myself into thinking, that someday later she would realize what she had lost... But I don't think I'll listen to myself, since I'm an idiot so I'll take MrCode's advice instead. Wish me luck.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
MrCode
Senior Don Juan
