TheLadiesMan
Master Don Juan
...you can get it anytime, but just not with peeps who are up to your standards?
It's going on a month now......
...I don't want to call the ex.
It's going on a month now......
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
What's your point? Anyone can call up a mid-tier or better hooker and get laid, which is no different than you calling your ex. It's a compromise in self-esteem.TheLadiesMan said:...you can get it anytime, but just not with peeps who are up to your standards?
It's going on a month now.........I don't want to call the ex.
2 Years! Why? What is your reason for that?squirrels said:What's your point? Anyone can call up a mid-tier or better hooker and get laid, which is no different than you calling your ex. It's a compromise in self-esteem.
But yes, you're in a dry spell.
A month is mild. It's been like 2 years for me.
Warrior74 said:2 Years! Why? What is your reason for that?
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
My standards are realistic. Every guy is different, but Id rather focus my time on getting girls up to my standards. By my standards, I mean girls who when I am out with them, I am proud to be with someone that hot/great etc... I COULD have sex with several girls who are ok, but I'd rather not deal with it. Like I said, every guy is different and this is just me & my choices.Warrior74 said:yah well, lowering your standards eh? Do you think your standards are realistic? I have a few friends who have totally unrealistic standards and haven't had sex in a few years because of it.
I'll say this. When your getting laid, you tend to get laid more. Sometimes you have to get the ball rolling. It may not be a mansion, but you gotta get a starter home at some point and work your way up. You can't be homeless and say "I want a mansion! but I refuse to live anywhere until I get one!" You wouldn't know what to do with it when you got it and will probably loose it from lack of home ownership experience, if you follow my analogy. Think it over gents.
I've found that sex in general, is overrated. I have only been with two women that I have considered to be "good" in bed. The rest were mediocre.backbreaker said:I think the w hole "dry spell" thing is more media driven crap. first off, a dry spell assumses that your only goal in life is getting laid. While I do get laid and have no problem getting laid, if I were not to get any for a while, it would not be that big a deal becuase IT's not that big a deal.
A real dry spell for me is stop working out for 4 months and gaining weight. Stop putting in the work it is to be a successful person becuase I dont' 'feel like it', not deciding to go out and find some woman and parlay a night into some pointless sex, just so I can say I'm not in a "dry spell".
nothing wrong with getting it, but nothing is wrong with not getting it either.
Wise and true words, my friends.Warrior74 said:I'll say this. When your getting laid, you tend to get laid more. Sometimes you have to get the ball rolling. It may not be a mansion, but you gotta get a starter home at some point and work your way up. You can't be homeless and say "I want a mansion! but I refuse to live anywhere until I get one!" You wouldn't know what to do with it when you got it and will probably loose it from lack of home ownership experience, if you follow my analogy. Think it over gents.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
squirrels said:What's your point? Anyone can call up a mid-tier or better hooker and get laid, which is no different than you calling your ex. It's a compromise in self-esteem.
But yes, you're in a dry spell.
A month is mild. It's been like 2 years for me.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.