Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
Your situation is a textbook example of why I ALWAYS tell young men never to even consider monogamy until 28-30 y.o. and even then being very selective.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Is it ok to make your girlfriend feel like she is not good enough for you?
- Thread starter BobFuest
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Bob I think you should have coughed up the full story at the start. Maybe you have some dominant tendencies and you like to humiliate your GF/ submissive. Perhaps you should formalize the arrangement in some way rather than doing it in an ad hoc fashion. I say this because you have had the "complaint" made by other partners, so you must be eliciting the response.
Also you wouldn't be telling us about it unless you yourself had misgivings.
Also you wouldn't be telling us about it unless you yourself had misgivings.
Comment from a girl
Hi fellas,
A quick comment:
I agree that women are emotionally difficult, BUT the two sexiest, most virile men I've ever met made me feel WONDERFUL about myself - compliments, flowers, apologies after rotten behavior, the whole bit. Their studliness did not depend upon their not giving in to women's emotions, but instead upon their life achievements - both guys are extremely intelligent, successful and in great physical shape.
These men had NO shortage of interested women. We're talking LINES of women. I chatted with one of these men in his office over a 30 min period on one occasion, and I swear that about 5 women came in and out of his office doing him favors over that short period.
There's some way to do both the adoring boyfriend AND the prized stud, and it's not by staring at other women.
I think that the way to do it is to really concentrate on each woman when you are talking/out on a date as though that woman is the sole focus of attention at that time, and not check out/flirt with other women. It's very intoxicating to have a guy's focused attention and admiration, even for the length of a long-term relationship. It will keep your girl around longer than treating yourself as the PRIZE (uh hum).
One of the many reasons that I haven't been tempted to cheat on my husband is that my husband is by my side and showing me off when we're out together.
By the way, don't argue over the flowers, just buy them. You look petty.
Hi fellas,
A quick comment:
I agree that women are emotionally difficult, BUT the two sexiest, most virile men I've ever met made me feel WONDERFUL about myself - compliments, flowers, apologies after rotten behavior, the whole bit. Their studliness did not depend upon their not giving in to women's emotions, but instead upon their life achievements - both guys are extremely intelligent, successful and in great physical shape.
These men had NO shortage of interested women. We're talking LINES of women. I chatted with one of these men in his office over a 30 min period on one occasion, and I swear that about 5 women came in and out of his office doing him favors over that short period.
There's some way to do both the adoring boyfriend AND the prized stud, and it's not by staring at other women.
I think that the way to do it is to really concentrate on each woman when you are talking/out on a date as though that woman is the sole focus of attention at that time, and not check out/flirt with other women. It's very intoxicating to have a guy's focused attention and admiration, even for the length of a long-term relationship. It will keep your girl around longer than treating yourself as the PRIZE (uh hum).
One of the many reasons that I haven't been tempted to cheat on my husband is that my husband is by my side and showing me off when we're out together.
By the way, don't argue over the flowers, just buy them. You look petty.
GuitarOnFire
Senior Don Juan
What? This is IMO horrible advice. It may be intoxicating for the woman to have a guy fawning over her, but it certainly won't lead to a second or third date if the man supplicates. Pay attention to the girl, but don't replace the waiter at the restaurant!minda said:
There is nothing wrong with being the prize. Too many men let the woman be the prize and we all know how those marriages/relationships turn out.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
Looks like common decency is not so common. Being the prize does not equate with being a disrespectful azzhole, nor does having a bit of respect for her by not ogling every hottie while you're out with her equate with being a wuss.
That said, do what you'll do. Perhaps it's better for you to have a FB who won't care that much about your wandering eyes than a GF who will.
That said, do what you'll do. Perhaps it's better for you to have a FB who won't care that much about your wandering eyes than a GF who will.