"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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is alcohol an essential for the first date ?

Bingo-Player

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so I've got a date with a potential new plate this week a cute HB 7 from what i can tell from pictures although she looks like she could have potential for a higher rating .....time will tell

I've not been able to do the whole "first date" thing much over this last year as
all my plates have been social circle plates and i knew them pretty well before dating anyway

this chick has popped up out of nowhere so I'm a little undecided as to what to do for the first date

its a toss between a civilised coffee or a full blown session on the booze

i know which ones more likely to get me sex at the end, but I've been doing so fvcking well "drying out" from alcohol over the last 6 weeks I'm not sure i want to break from my sobriety :down:

my question is does anyone have any experiences of escalating a non alcohol fuelled first date into sex or into a nice amount of physical contact ? :rolleyes:
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Tictac

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If you're using alcohol as a crutch to get laid, that's about as beta as it gets.

By your logic, you'll be justifying roofies.

I've gotten laid plenty without any alcohol involved and I've been doing it for decades.

If you want an excuse to drink, find a better one.
 

Zarky

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eh, I disagree. All my first dates involve alcohol. Lets her know what I'm after and lets me know if she's willing to provide. If she insists on coffee or some sh*t, I next her. Drunken sex is the best (and, indeed, the only good) ending to a first date, IMHO.
 

Comatozed

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I disagree.

Why make it harder for yourself?

Even if you're/she's not drunk, the fact you've been drinking can help her justify sleeping with you if she's that kind of girl. Plus, I have more fun when I'm drunk no matter what I'm doing, it's not a case of it being a 'crutch' it's a case of having fun.
 

RedBear

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Are you saying your game is not good enough to pick up a woman who is not drunk?

Comatozed said:
Why make it harder for yourself?
Because you want to improve your game. Also it doesn't seem like OP actually wants to drink.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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logicallefty

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Alcohol is OK on first dates in moderation but in your case if you are trying to stay sober I would stick with that. Take her to a bar and let her drink and just order a Coke. If she asks why you aren't drinking just say "I need to stay sober in case you get all crazy and attack me".
 

yoyoing

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Alcohol is good on first date !
I usually just drink 1-2 drinks and if it goes really well I had an extra one.
To me alchohol is just a short circuit to quicker sex !
You probably can do well without it but girl are often shy even if they like you a lot and alcohol loosen them up.

That said . Location is the key . Please find a nice place where you can sit side by side and not some awkward half packed location .
 

VladPatton

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Do coffee...it's cheaper. Save the alcohol for the next few dates when you know she's on her way to Fuxville.
 

Bingo-Player

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Tictac said:
If you're using alcohol as a crutch to get laid, that's about as beta as it gets.

By your logic, you'll be justifying roofies.

I've gotten laid plenty without any alcohol involved and I've been doing it for decades.

If you want an excuse to drink, find a better one.
LMAO woah now cowboy where did i say I'm using alcohol as a crutch to get laid :crazy:

all i asked was does anyone have any experiences in getting physical with a chick ON THE FIRST DATE without it

unfortunatley in modern society people simply feel more comfortable about casual sex when alcohol is involved this is no secret even more so in a high pressured social set like a first date

i actually like lefty's idea of letting her drink and attempting to keep sober :up:
 

LMFAO

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Yes you can get a kiss after a coffee date if all goes well, it's fairly straight forward and I've done it on occasion.

That said a date at a bar with alcohol is usually the ideal for a first date. The girl has an excuse to "let her hair down" and you can get much closer to her, and possibly bang her. For online dates this is usually the way to go.

If you are looking for an LTR they are both fine, for a fvck buddy going for a coffee gives off the wrong vibe. That's my opinion.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Comatozed

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I only had one coffee first date. got her back to mine but lmr hit pretty hard. It was strange scenario as it was like 2pm on a week day and my flatmates were in so she probably didn't wanna **** cos of a few reasons.

I reckon if it's a friday night and she's drunk we ****.
 

usernamedox11

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alcohol is the number #1 antidote for last minute resistance/anti-slut defense.

Don't make it harder on yourself, and forget the beta/alpha nonsense. What matters is getting laid if that is your goal.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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