"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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In a precidament

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FlexpertHamilton

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I starting seeing a cute 21 year old Latina recently, and she's going to want exclusivity from me soon.

Problem is, there's European girl I've been chatting with for months whom I met on IG, and we've tentatively had a trip to Spain planned. She's probably a legit 9 (but the Latina is probably an 8), and I genuinely want to go on the trip even if I went alone.

So, does anyone have experience in being honest and convincing other women to let you still fvck other chicks? Or is this pointless and should you just lie? I strongly prefer to avoid lying whenever I can help it.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Scars

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I would just be honest. She can't really fault you for making plans while you're single, even if they were made months in advance. Just say it's something you really want to do and make it known you're going regardless.

Too many men want to lie in situations like this, but a woman will have way more respect for you if you're just honest. I've seen it countless times where men have cheated on their women and were given a second chance because they were honest about it. But if you try to lie or make her look stupid, it's game over.

Ideally, just say you want to hold off from exclusivity for awhile until after your trip. Say you want see how things go with the other girl and experience Spain. If you're single, a woman can't be mad about you dating other girls. But if you try and make her your GF before then, that is only going to end badly. Any semi-rational woman she be understanding, and most likely this chick has other options as well, so even if she's a little upset, she'll get over it. This is a HUGE neg though on your part. So don't be afraid of breaking a few rules and making her feel wanted/special in the mean time. Don't verbally say it, but make her FEEL like she is #1. The Spain chick is just another option and it "probably won't work out anyway". After you trip, then you can discuss being exclusive, if that's what you still want.

This is at least how I would play it. Some guys might do it differently. Actually curious to hear other opinions.

Good luck OP.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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I would just be honest. She can't really fault you for making plans while you're single, even if they were made months in advance. Just say it's something you really want to do and make it known you're going regardless.

Too many men want to lie in situations like this, but a woman will have way more respect for you if you're just honest. I've seen it countless times where men have cheated on their women and were given a second chance because they were honest about it. But if you try to lie or make her look stupid, it's game over.

Ideally, just say you want to hold off from exclusivity for awhile until after your trip. Say you want see how things go with the other girl and experience Spain. If you're single, a woman can't be mad about you dating other girls. But if you try and make her your GF before then, that is only going to end badly. Any semi-rational woman she be understanding, and most likely this chick has other options as well, so even if she's a little upset, she'll get over it. This is a HUGE neg though on your part. So don't be afraid of breaking a few rules and making her feel wanted/special in the mean time. Don't verbally say it, but make her FEEL like she is #1. The Spain chick is just another option and it "probably won't work out anyway". After you trip, then you can discuss being exclusive, if that's what you still want.

This is at least how I would play it. Some guys might do it differently. Actually curious to hear other opinions.

Good luck OP.
Great advice, thanks.

Also, Predicament*
 

Machine10033

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Don’t lie.... let the Latina know you have other options. At worst she says F off.... and you still have a hotter option.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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FlexpertHamilton

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Don’t lie.... let the Latina know you have other options. At worst she says F off.... and you still have a hotter option.
Yeah but she's here right now and ready to go. The Euro chick will just be a good memory.
 

SW15

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Yeah but she's here right now and ready to go. The Euro chick will just be a good memory.
This is so fucckin' simple. Stick with the local, 21 year old Latina. Forget the Euro chick. The trip is tentative anyway.
 

Bokanovsky

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I would just be honest. She can't really fault you for making plans while you're single, even if they were made months in advance. Just say it's something you really want to do and make it known you're going regardless.
I have to strongly disagree with this. There is no way this girl is going to be cool with him going to Spain with another chick. No fvcking way. Even if she does not immediately break up with him, it will ruin things later.

OP, women don’t value honesty the same way men do. A woman would rather accept a story that deep down she suspects is BS than hear an honest admission. To a woman, the latter would be a sign of weakness.

Tell her that you are going on a trip that was booked long ago with a group of friends. Don’t go into details.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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I have to strongly disagree with this. There is no way this girl is going to be cool with him going to Spain with another chick. No fvcking way. Even if she does not immediately break up with him, it will ruin things later.

OP, women don’t value honesty the same way men do. A woman would rather accept a story that deep down she suspects is BS than hear an honest admission. To a woman, the latter would be a sign of weakness.

Tell her that you are going on a trip that was booked long ago with a group of friends. Don’t go into details.
Unfortunately, now that I think back, I already mentioned the trip with her (in another context), though I didn't say when or for how long.

This is so fucckin' simple. Stick with the local, 21 year old Latina. Forget the Euro chick. The trip is tentative anyway.
It's not tentative, I already booked a hotel (no deposit) and she offered to send me money to pay for the plane tix.

Man I wish I could post their pics it would help a lot.
 
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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The Duke

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Who cares its just two chics you dont know very well. Go have fun. If it blows up, big deal, find more girls.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Too soon after your last breakup, absurd to be considering exclusivity. Ive been in a similar situation and lost two girls because of a pre-planned trip though, but the destination didnt give me any plausible deniability about what I was doing.
Yeah, I told her I want to "take it slow" and am going to resist exclusivity every step of the way. I'm just thinking long-term. Since I already told her that the trip was planned at one point, I'll either have to come up with an elaborate lie, or just be willing to lose her over it. On another note she is over 10 years younger than me and has only ever dated much older men, red flag anyway.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I starting seeing a cute 21 year old Latina recently, and she's going to want exclusivity from me soon.

Problem is, there's European girl I've been chatting with for months whom I met on IG, and we've tentatively had a trip to Spain planned. She's probably a legit 9 (but the Latina is probably an 8), and I genuinely want to go on the trip even if I went alone.

So, does anyone have experience in being honest and convincing other women to let you still fvck other chicks? Or is this pointless and should you just lie? I strongly prefer to avoid lying whenever I can help it.
Why do you feel the need to give a woman exclusivity on her terms instead of your own?

Perhaps that's the better question that needs to be answered here.

Also, why do you feel this other woman needs to know about your trip to Spain? People go on trips all the time, she doesn't need to know who you are going with.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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Why do you feel the need to give a woman exclusivity on her terms instead of your own?

Perhaps that's the better question that needs to be answered here.

Also, why do you feel this other woman needs to know about your trip to Spain? People go on trips all the time, she doesn't need to know who you are going with.
I was just overthinking things, I had just broke up with a girl and was in a weird place mentally. I am not going to be exclusive with the Latina anytime soon, if ever. Nor am I going to tell her about the trip. You can lock this thread lol.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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