"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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IM'ing?

Porky

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IM is the lamest form of communication.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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DJoneday

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I log onto IM for about 30 min each night after work, and only talk to people who talk to me first. AIM takes out all of the communication except for words (and with body language n all, there's a LOT more to it). It also makes you out to be some computer nerd if she sees you online all the time. Just stay away from it.
 

InsidiousNstinct

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Who cares....?

You wanna chat online with a girl, fine do it. Who cares what others think.

Do what you want :)
 

jakeyboy

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Originally posted by JBizzle
Who cares....?

You wanna chat online with a girl, fine do it. Who cares what others think.

Do what you want :)
you cant always do what you want. what would happen to the guy if i told him it was alright to go prostrate himself before his oneitis and proclaim his endearing love for her?

some days i get the urge to text my ex girl. but can i? no. it just seems desperate and foolish.

in this case though, instant messaging lets you run out of things to say.

there are only so many exciting things you can talk about over IM

not for me, but i guess its an individual thing.
 

InsidiousNstinct

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you cant always do what you want. what would happen to the guy if i told him it was alright to go prostrate himself before his oneitis and proclaim his endearing love for her?
There are no wrong answers, just ignorant people.

And here I was talkin about showin love to everyone....Im such a bad example :D
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Tboneman

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I may not be very well gifted in the dating scene, but one thing I learned is to NEVER ASK OUT A GIRL VIA AIM!!!! I can't stress this enough! It takes so much more courage to ask her out via real life, so it'll make you look better. If you do it via AIM, you'll probably seem like a coward for hiding behing the electronic screen and keyboard.
 

Cloudtopsun2100

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i think IM can be used on a very limited basis just to gauge a girls IL in you to see if she IM's you but even then....don't IM with girls cause its very counterproductive.
 

jakeyboy

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Originally posted by JBizzle
There are no wrong answers, just ignorant people.

And here I was talkin about showin love to everyone....Im such a bad example :D

true true. ;)
 

aBAzLLnA

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First off, there used to be a huge thread on IM'ing, search for it.

Secondly,
some days i get the urge to text my ex girl. but can i? no. it just seems desperate and foolish.
"It just seems desperate and foolish" eh? You are truly THAT concerned about how you're perceived? It matters THAT much that you can't text her once?

Why the hell are some people so effing ridiculous trying to be a "dj"?
 

FMX

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Well I am hard of hearing (Profoundly deaf) but unfortunately using the phone as part of my commuincation is virtually impossible for me to use. My communication is excellent, just like you lot and I talk to girls all the time. Now, obviously the choice of contact I have is, IM, Video and text. Quite suprisely I don't hardly use any of them, maybe a bit of texting at times but I arrange all my dates 'face to face'. 'Face to Face' is the original fundmental type of all communication, (see and hear). So if we refer back to IM, it's great to piss around with talking to mates about rubbish but I don't feel it's the right 'dj' way to girls.

Nobody knows why my hearing was affected at the age of two, even professional scientists/Doctors were invovled so my hearing loss can never be found out. But it doesn't stop doing any 'dj' style;).
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Sparkyy

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Originally posted by aBAzLLnA
Why the hell are some people so effing ridiculous trying to be a "dj"?
Especially when being a DJ means doing what you want to do.

Think of it this way words count for about 7-8% of the total communication going on. There is no kino, eye contact, projecting emotions, body launguage or voice tonality on IM. I suppose it's alright to use but it's much better to talk in real life.
 

jakeyboy

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Originally posted by aBAzLLnA
First off, there used to be a huge thread on IM'ing, search for it.

Secondly,

"It just seems desperate and foolish" eh? You are truly THAT concerned about how you're perceived? It matters THAT much that you can't text her once?

Why the hell are some people so effing ridiculous trying to be a "dj"?
look,everytime i texted her in the past, she either a)****ing ignored me, b)brushed me off or c) told me she was busy but she'd text me back (she never did)

its not so much a matter about being a dj as you so put it.

its more of my pride.

i dont like to get beaten down time and time again

so yes, i think about her, but i must not text her in order to get over her.

specific to my case only though

hope you understand now..

its not about the dj.
 

aBAzLLnA

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Ok, makes more sense. Although, tell me you did learn after...maybe the second time she brushed you off? Usually I just delete SN's of girls I don't talk to, or girls that haven't talked to me in a while.
 

Cloudtopsun2100

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just talked on Yahoo Messenger with this girl I am dating...a whole 5 minutes.....it was horrible but had to be done- one thing I miss that I didn't even think about before is hearing the girl laugh instead of seeing a "hehe" or "lol"... of course if your IL is not so high in a girl then who cares IM them whenever
 

jakeyboy

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Originally posted by aBAzLLnA
Ok, makes more sense. Although, tell me you did learn after...maybe the second time she brushed you off? Usually I just delete SN's of girls I don't talk to, or girls that haven't talked to me in a while.
it was after a long while man, i was a complete chump and oblivious to her obvious brushing off..until one day it just hit me in the face. anyways, thats a good idea, am going to flip thorugh my phonebook and delete now. :D
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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