"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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im seriously about to get laid

D

DJnoob

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ok, after a year on this freaking site, i think im finally gona get some action tonight from a co worker and possibly her friend..

SHe's a 6.5.

But here is the thing, i was working one day and she came in to "see her other co worker".. and along with her was her hb8 friend. (i know she came in to see me)

We teased each other a bit.

Tonight for st patrciks day.. im going over to her house and her hb8 is there too! its just gona be us 3!!! I went and got condoms already.,,

Possibly a 3 some? FVCKKKK yeah! i hope so. Anyway, what usually happens when her friend is there with her for those who were in a similar situation before like mine. And should I bring some booze?

Thanks,
DJnoob

im leaving in 10 minutes,so respond fast!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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amethyst

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Emm... you want to take booze go for a bottle of mescal, with the worm in it of course and remember to conceal the condoms... I would also tone down the excitement you might not even get laid tonight bro and a threesome is a tad ambitious... Good luck anyway.

Love

Amethyst
 
?

( . )( . )

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Stay home, if it took you a year to (possibly) get laid after having the answers on how to drop a b!tches panties layed out for you I dont want the risk of you spreading your genes. Suppose I'm driving down the road in 18 years time and your offspring is coming in the opposite direction?
 
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LeviathanIYG

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Goodluck!!

There is no usual maybe it's going to be a threesome or maybe she sees you as a friend and just wants to hang out but let us know how it goes.....

No DON’T drink!
 
E

Eccentric

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Keep the condoms in your car. Trust me. The last thing you want is to jump the gun on a friendly invite and think you're going to be in a 3-some. This **** will carry over into work, and you'll never be the same around her again.

Read the body language, and don't show your poker face.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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amethyst

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lol... Bad Lev there is nothing wrong with a few drinks (Specially in St. Paddies day... take a couple of cans of Guinness as well), as long as you don't get paralytic or become an imbecile when drunk it should be fine. And mescal just oils things really because its made in a different way (like tequila) than normal boose it will not make you a wanker if taken in moderation.

I always drink a bit in social gatherings but its expected I'm a barman after all.

Love

Amethystos
 
S

sexy_kuta

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giver man.. giver anal!
 
B

backbreaker

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( . )( . ) said:
Stay home, if it took you a year to (possibly) get laid after having the answers on how to drop a b!tches panties layed out for you I dont want the risk of you spreading your genes. Suppose I'm driving down the road in 18 years time and your offspring is coming in the opposite direction?
Click to expand...
ROTFLMAO
 
S

Spookey

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LMAO

congratulations.... remember there is a hell of a lot more to life than sex (even if it does cause it!)


anyone interested in taking bets on how long he lasts ??:p
 
I

itishe

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DJ you must master the art of Kegel and multi-orgasm.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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TxCowboy

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What ever happened to the "Dont dip your pen in company ink" speel ? ... I guess everyone in here is just tossing that out the window ?
 
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amethyst

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No rules apply to the true ladies man... when it comes to the art of lady killing.

So boys pack up your shotguns we are going to irac

Amethyst
 
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TxCowboy

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amethyst said:
No rules apply to the true ladies man... when it comes to the art of lady killing.

So boys pack up your shotguns we are going to irac

Amethyst
Click to expand...
We'll c about that when she gives u a fuk , gets pregnant, and then rants to the whole company that you raped her or some sh1t and will demand a million .... Then you get fired and ur broke a$$ is on the streets ....

Obviously, at that point, I guess the military will be your only option one you lose the job...

-Laterz
 
O

organizedconfusion

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woah there , calm down buddy or you'll blow your load as soon as you stick her! you sound a tad bit too excited..take a few deep breaths and relax, i am serious. :)
take a shot just to relax and loosen you up- TAKE YOUR TIME, this is the
moment you been waiting for..enjoy it!
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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amethyst

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Ha ha ha... Hey Cowboy in the bar I work they encourage relationships between workers. Man our staff night outings are like ****ing orgies im tellin’ ya...

Amethyst
 
G

Gubby

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How about this: you don't GET LAID, you LAY. If you "get laid", the woman is USING YOU. Does that make you feel powerful and masculine?
 
T

Tomatoes

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Was going to post advice but its all done now...How did it go?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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