"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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I'm intrested in my co worker ?

taiyuu_otoko

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I've already established in my OP that have little, if any, work related interaction--Plus, I'll be leaving the company in a year or so.
Not to question your intention, just consider ALL outcomes. What if you flat out ask him out, he says no, and then talks about you negatively behind your back? Maybe not likely but an uncomfortable situation to suffer through for a year.

It would suck to be known as the "girl who chases dudes at work" for a year. You'll never know if you're going to be needing anybody there as a future reference.

Which is why I suggested to make it only "half obvious" you are asking him so you can measure his reaction, and proceed accordingly.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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PuffyPonny

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UPDATE

So I finally saw him today after 28 days due of me taking time off work after an unexpected injury .
'
The first thing he said was "hey where have you been?"its nice to see you".Then I proceeded to explain to him the reasons why I was absent. Then he said that" It was good to see me back".We chatted briefly and I asked him if he has been at the gym lately and he said he hasn't been in 2 months because of other obligations,then I told him that he still looks great ...he didn't get to answer my compliment because other co workers showed to ask me about work related issued.At that point he had to go back to his department.


I was just wondering because some of my co workers were indifferent about absence ..they didn't really question me about it.He even said"you haven't been around for almost a month now huh?Not to mention that we work in different departments and we run into each other few times a week.We work in a big building.The fact that he noticed my absence raised my suspicion
What do you guys think..
 

DiegoSantori

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Be direct. You're the woman, so he'll have to advance and make moves on you. But I still think if you're interested in him, you should show him. Flirt with him, make eye contact, get his number, maybe hang out with him after work. Do things to show that you're interested in him; womanly things that will start making him think "Hmm, I think she likes me". It's like fishing. You're giving him the bait. If he doesn't like you, he won't take it. If he does, he'll take the bait.

If you're leaving soon and you two hardly work/see each other in the work place, I think it's fine if you're seeing him. If something unfortunate were to happen you'd be leaving anyways. Plus, you hardly see him, right?

Like Tictac said, ask him on that coffee date.
I had a good time reading this in Muhammad Ali's voice.
 

yungballa

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"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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BetterCallSaul

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ask him out already, sheesh!
No kidding.

I'm also of the same opinion as Asmodeus. Lots of women are like

"I looked in his general direction for a solid 2 seconds and he didn't even ask me out! He must be gay."
 
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