sylvester the cat
Master Don Juan
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"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I'm having trouble dropping this bpd.
- Thread starter sylvester the cat
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
Hey man.. this is going to be the hardest thing you will ever do but you need to go complete no contact with this girl and get this person out of your life. If she has only been with you for 4 months imagine how hard things will get a year from now.
Gangster family man.. for real?
Imagine how happy you will be once you are with a completely normal sane.. non bpd woman whom loves you and is not crazy.
Easier said than done.. I went complete beta on my last breakup so I know the feeling.
Good luck brotha.
Gangster family man.. for real?
Imagine how happy you will be once you are with a completely normal sane.. non bpd woman whom loves you and is not crazy.
Easier said than done.. I went complete beta on my last breakup so I know the feeling.
Good luck brotha.
He's already tried NC and that didn't work. Answer her calls and texts as normal. If she pushes to meet again do not agree. Make out you are busy or seeing friends then tell her you will contact her to arrange the next meet. Of course do not contact her. Soon enough she will get tired of this and drop it. It's the NC and threats to dump her that will attract this toxic kind of person to you. Just make out everything is normal. As for her stuff. Put it in a taxi and get them to deliver it to her.MillionBillionaire said:
GS750
Master Don Juan
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I had the same issue getting a BPD out of my life. She'd go hot and cold. She hooked up with a new guy but would still contact me regularly. I told her we shouldn't be in contact, she'd say okay. Soon enough she'd be back in contact, usually with something nostalgic that she knew I'd respond to. Must have gone through that 3 or 4 times. She used her twisted logic to turn the failure of our relationship on me, rationalizing her screwed up behavior and making it all my fault. She'd tell me she missed me. She'd tell me she'd stop contacting me. She'd tell me she still had feelings for me. She'd tell me maybe we'd be together again in the future. I went ghost, she texted and asked if we could talk. I blew her off. She kept texting. It was a total mind fvck. In a way I did and still do feel bad for her. But I went complete NC several months ago for my own sanity. These girls really are toxic for you. They will manipulate and scheme and be emotional vampires as long as you let them. Anything to keep you from walking away. She still texts even to this day. But I see the manipulation for what it is and ignore. It seems like when you walk, it flares up the abandonment fears and they cling to you. You've gotta go strict NC and stick to it. That's the only way. Good luck bro.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
What a long and painful way to drag things out... when it is finally over... op is going to wish he had done it sooner.:-) said:
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
It's already a long and painful drag by the sound of it. Treat her as you would a spam call. I get these PPI insurance calls all the time. Do you think they listen or care if I tell them not to call? Not one bit. Like the BPD they care only for what's in it for them (commission/validation). As long as OP has moved on in his mind that's all that matters.MillionBillionaire said: