"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I'm constantly used as a trophy!
- Thread starter Jariel
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Blue Phoenix
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2004
- Messages
- 1,335
- Reaction score
- 27
And what about hot girls with "ugly" BF's?
However, I always try to humble myself and play down my qualities to make them feel more comfortable. Then before I realise what's happening, there's a role reversal. I've humbled myself too much and I'm putting her on the pedestal.
Lesson: I need to stay on the damn pedestal!
jariel, that sounds interesting. I wonder if girls treat all good looking guys the same?Originally posted by Jariel
I've started to see another pattern lately. It's fair to say i have a lot going for me, but I am a very modest guy. Whenever I meet a girl who is interested, it nearly always starts with them placing me on a pedestal, supplicating to me and apologising for the slightest thing.
However, I always try to humble myself and play down my qualities to make them feel more comfortable. Then before I realise what's happening, there's a role reversal. I've humbled myself too much and I'm putting her on the pedestal.
Lesson: I need to stay on the damn pedestal!
They might feel he's a great catch and can easily lose them to any other woman, thus the girl will become AFC around the guy.
I guess in the beginning of any relationship, you need to set the rules or else you'll end up spoiling them like your humbleness has. Then the odds went against you.....interesting post indeed.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 21, 2004
- Messages
- 1,887
- Reaction score
- 12
*clap*
You have figured out something that has never occured to me. Much like you've ive made the exact same error, yet never realized it. now that I read it, it's so simple, yet it all makes sense.
lesson learned - if someone puts you on a pedestal, stay there, so simple, so smart
thanks a million.
edit - this post should be archived imo.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
It's not always that easy to stay on the damn pedestal though