"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I'm constantly used as a trophy!
- Thread starter Jariel
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Blue Phoenix
Master Don Juan
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- Jul 23, 2004
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And what about hot girls with "ugly" BF's?
However, I always try to humble myself and play down my qualities to make them feel more comfortable. Then before I realise what's happening, there's a role reversal. I've humbled myself too much and I'm putting her on the pedestal.
Lesson: I need to stay on the damn pedestal!
jariel, that sounds interesting. I wonder if girls treat all good looking guys the same?Originally posted by Jariel
I've started to see another pattern lately. It's fair to say i have a lot going for me, but I am a very modest guy. Whenever I meet a girl who is interested, it nearly always starts with them placing me on a pedestal, supplicating to me and apologising for the slightest thing.
However, I always try to humble myself and play down my qualities to make them feel more comfortable. Then before I realise what's happening, there's a role reversal. I've humbled myself too much and I'm putting her on the pedestal.
Lesson: I need to stay on the damn pedestal!
They might feel he's a great catch and can easily lose them to any other woman, thus the girl will become AFC around the guy.
I guess in the beginning of any relationship, you need to set the rules or else you'll end up spoiling them like your humbleness has. Then the odds went against you.....interesting post indeed.
MindOverMatter
Master Don Juan
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- May 21, 2004
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*clap*
You have figured out something that has never occured to me. Much like you've ive made the exact same error, yet never realized it. now that I read it, it's so simple, yet it all makes sense.
lesson learned - if someone puts you on a pedestal, stay there, so simple, so smart
thanks a million.
edit - this post should be archived imo.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I-am-someone
Senior Don Juan
It's not always that easy to stay on the damn pedestal though