"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

I'm a loser..approach journal

blackbelt2k

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Messages
467
Reaction score
1
Location
NJ / NYC
So i thought i had it down with the ladies, turn out i didn't. I now see, more than ever, that i need practice to get better with my approaches. Please leave some insight and helpful hints..

7/17/07
#1 (don't know if this really counts as approach)
I'm leaving work, and going to the elevator. I see a HB6 i've seen around the company. She's already getting into the elevator, so i follow, and squeeze in before the doors close...

Me: Dang, trying to kill me..(smile, make eye contact)
HB: laughs...sorry... Hey, I've seen you around, I'm blha blah,
Me: hey blah, I'm bb2k, puts out hand to shake hers.(tries to keep it gentle and last a little longer than avg.)
So we talk about ****, as we walk out the building, we get to the corner
HB: so i'm going this way blah blah
Me: ohh, me too, I'll walk with you, unless your trying to get rid of me
HB: laughs, no, blah blha
so we walk a couple blocks, and I try to keep the convo going, asking her where she lives, what she does for fun.. So we arrive to the stop i thought she was going to turn, so i shake her hand and tell her good bye, and turn for my block..I notice she's going the same way
Me: Still following me huh (smile keep eye contact)
Her: blha blah
pause in convo as we manuver through crowd
Then she picks up back the convo
I'm approach my s top so i tell her i'll catch her later

Not the best approach, I don't even know if it counts since she technically started by introducing herself. I think i came off a little afc; i also think i did more qualifing than made her qualify... I need to keep practicing, leave me some good suggestions guys
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Skel

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 5, 2003
Messages
1,721
Reaction score
10
It seems you did ok. You introduced yourself and actually made small talk which is more than most of the so called DJ's can do on this forum. Just keep practicing and try to number close once you get comfortable approaching.
 

On Point

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 24, 2007
Messages
140
Reaction score
2
Sounds like she was wanting you to #close. If you don't do it when they're expecting it you end up in the friend zone, but good job for approaching.

You did good with the jokes and role reversal. Sounds like you might be a little too hard on yourself or overanalyzing. It's good to keep the interaction short like you did, you just got to #close!

blackbelt2k said:
So i thought i had it down with the ladies, turn out i didn't. I now see, more than ever, that i need practice to get better with my approaches. Please leave some insight and helpful hints..

7/17/07
#1 (don't know if this really counts as approach)
I'm leaving work, and going to the elevator. I see a HB6 i've seen around the company. She's already getting into the elevator, so i follow, and squeeze in before the doors close...

Me: Dang, trying to kill me..(smile, make eye contact)
HB: laughs...sorry... Hey, I've seen you around, I'm blha blah,
Me: hey blah, I'm bb2k, puts out hand to shake hers.(tries to keep it gentle and last a little longer than avg.)
So we talk about ****, as we walk out the building, we get to the corner
HB: so i'm going this way blah blah
Me: ohh, me too, I'll walk with you, unless your trying to get rid of me
HB: laughs, no, blah blha
so we walk a couple blocks, and I try to keep the convo going, asking her where she lives, what she does for fun.. So we arrive to the stop i thought she was going to turn, so i shake her hand and tell her good bye, and turn for my block..I notice she's going the same way
Me: Still following me huh (smile keep eye contact)
Her: blha blah
pause in convo as we manuver through crowd
Then she picks up back the convo
I'm approach my s top so i tell her i'll catch her later

Not the best approach, I don't even know if it counts since she technically started by introducing herself. I think i came off a little afc; i also think i did more qualifing than made her qualify... I need to keep practicing, leave me some good suggestions guys
 

blackbelt2k

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Messages
467
Reaction score
1
Location
NJ / NYC
I wanted to # close, but at sometime during the convo, she said the bars she goes to are 25 and up for the gents cause its more upscale.. I think this was a shyt test in a way, but not too sure.. but i replied, something along the lines of "I can wing my way in, just tell them, I'VE GOT MONEY!" ... which got a laugh... she wasn't giving much kino though, i touched her a few times, but she never really initiated any touching... just for future reference, does this mean a no go?
 

Analytic

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 21, 2006
Messages
247
Reaction score
3
First thing that caught me is your thread title, why are you calling yourself a loser? you're defeating yourself before you even start. I hope you don't have this mindset when approuching.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

blackbelt2k

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Messages
467
Reaction score
1
Location
NJ / NYC
Analytic said:
First thing that caught me is your thread title, why are you calling yourself a loser? you're defeating yourself before you even start. I hope you don't have this mindset when approuching.
lol, no, i typed it jokingly..simply pointing out the face that i sucked at the approach, lol
 

Omen

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 25, 2002
Messages
858
Reaction score
5
Seemed good to me. I may have left off the where do you live part because you never know how a woman might interpret that. I might have saved that for later.

You do have those women that go... This guy just met me, and we talked for like 2min and he asked where I lived.

We all know women are messed up, so leaving the where do you live part out, may be better next time.

And not that it screwed anything up, you just never know with a woman.

You.. .Where do you live?
Her... In New York. (ha ha)

Then she does this gossip crap with her friends.... I wonder if he wanted my address? He could have just asked for the number.

What ever, girls are whacked :)
 

On Point

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 24, 2007
Messages
140
Reaction score
2
If she isn't reacting badly to the kino just keep moving forward. Read her actions, but don't waste time trying to read her mind. I expect most woman aren't going to initiate much of anything.

As far as where they live, I usually ask "What part of town are you from?" so I can get an idea of how far away they live without making them nervous.

blackbelt2k said:
I wanted to # close, but at sometime during the convo, she said the bars she goes to are 25 and up for the gents cause its more upscale.. I think this was a shyt test in a way, but not too sure.. but i replied, something along the lines of "I can wing my way in, just tell them, I'VE GOT MONEY!" ... which got a laugh... she wasn't giving much kino though, i touched her a few times, but she never really initiated any touching... just for future reference, does this mean a no go?
 

KneghtRyder

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2006
Messages
471
Reaction score
0
tell us some backgrond about yourself ...are you good looking ...how much experience etc
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Top