Idea for older DJ's

[gentleman193]

Which rock star said that the next time he decides to get married he'll just pick a chick he doesn't like and buy her a house?

Elvis, I hope my DJ skills get me to the point that I'm can date a new woman every week. Is that your goal, though? My goal is to find a few good women with high IL and keep them that way. About those depressed guys, are they expecting women to make them happy? That is AFC 101, is it not?

myfriendblu, Suppose a client said to you, "Hey, we'll pay your bill from now to eternity no matter what and if it doesn't work out we'll give you half our assets for good measure and we'll *still* pay your bill." Ever hear of a contract like that?

Back to the thread topic, one good opportunity for our crowd is to date women older than us. I don't see a sophisticated 30-something woman with a 17 yr old "senior" DJ and his pimped-out cell-phone homies BUT I've dated two women in their 30's and picked up one who must have been 40 (based on a comment about her kid in college). And the convo is keener, the chemistry better, and the dates were more interesting.

And I am thinking one reason is b/c *their* DJ skills are better. At Thanksgiving a single friend of my aunt's was there and she used kino and SS on me before we were introduced and it was *very* effective. I never had a girl my age turn me on like a light-switch just like that. This woman was actually my uncle's 2nd wife (my aunt was the first, now they are friends, weird, I know) and I think I can see how she got him. He was a rich doctor, too, quite a prize. Anyway, it is kind of nice to be on the receiving end once in awhile (Eileen take note) and I think you can definitely learn a lot from a good instructor.

Has anyone else messed around with older women? Was it a good learning experience or how did it go?

 

[Ricky]

30 year old DJ here.

I have been dating this girl and a few others during the last 2 years.

What we lack now is as many OPPORTUNITIES as our PRIORITIES have shifted a bit.

I'd like a few more opportunities.

Last night I went out for my Friday night happy hour beer with a co-worker. We talked a bit (he's married), I'm not of course and I realize that I am happy to see young,single women.

Seeing good looking women puts me in a great mood. I think we need a thread on what makes us happy. Find work you love, activities you love and create ways to be happy.

 

[fm2]

>Has anyone else messed around with older women? Was it a good learning experience or how did it go?<

When I was 17 I shagged, three different times, this married chick who had just turned 40. I think with older women there's far less game playing from them. They know what they want, be it just sex or the whole relationship, and they know who they want it with. They also tend to be somewhat established in life with their job, where they live, and their kids (if any) are old enough that they don't have to babysit them 24/7.

I think older women are FAR less complicated and you are able to just enjoy the time you spend with them and not have so much drama and gaming.

The flip side of all this is the fact that she does have her own life established. You have to play it cool and not try to insinuate yourself into her life (if you're looking at her as LTR material). Take your time, hang out with her, and let it go to where ever it's going to go.

 

[Eileen]

What is considered "older?" 30? 40? 60?

 

[Falcon Eye]

Originally posted by Eileen
What is considered "older?" 30? 40? 60?

Well obviously that depends on your frame of reference doesn't it. For a twenty year old, a thirty year old woman is older, for me she's very young. For me to consider a woman older she generally needs to be atleast five years older than I am, that would make her forty seven. The reverse is also true, she needs to be a five years younger to be considered a younger woman. Five years +/- is my rule of thumg, less than that and they are in the same age group.

In the past year, the oldest woman I've gotten in bed was fifty two and she was quite good.

 

[Eileen]

That’s my point Falcon Eye. Is age really a factor at all? I don’t believe so.

I tend to think that some people know what they want and others don’t. It has not to do with age, gender or geography.

Actually, I think most people know more about what they don’t want than what they do want. If more time were spent exploring what they do want instead of moaning about what they don’t want, they’d be a lot further along.

I think many older women have determined that what they don’t want is a man controlling their every move. Though many still do not know what it is they do want. They then settle for the attention of a man who is at very least not trying to control them.

And that’s it’s. I’m not thinking anymore today. It makes my brain ache.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Eileen
Oh, got screwed in a divorce did you? Sorry to hear that.


She could have been out building a career instead you know. If she was, it wasn't you that paid for everything, was it?

I

Never been married, and i don't remember ever saying that either....oh, thats right, a women putting false words into my mouth. Go figure
Im simple stating FACTS, that can't be written off.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Eileen
That’s my point Falcon Eye. Is age really a factor at all? I don’t believe so.

I.

LOL, the fact that you are asking such a question leads me to believe, IMO, that you are "older"...LOL

 

[Big Pappy]

Age is relative to a point

In Eileen's case, she can overcome a great many barriers with her style and substance. Looking 15 years younger than she really is doesn't hurt either.

I've heard several people say

"What kind of 40 year old man dates a 20 year old girl?"

I've heard 2 different responses to this question.

Answer one: Every 40 year old man that CAN, will!
Answer two: One that is hopelessly deluding himself into thinking he's going to find happiness in some child instead of a woman.


I'll date any lady that captures my interest. I could care less
if she's 20, 30 or 40.

The girlfriend of my buddy who was grabbing my thing last weekend, I met her mother. I'd love to date her! She's got to be around 40-45 and she's as sexy as they get.

 

[WestCoaster]

It's not age, but stage -- of life, that is

I learned this last weekend big time as I traveled a decent distance to see this gal I'm interested in. It hasn't been going anywhere and is in the dreaded friendship zone because I'm 500 miles away.

But as we were sitting at a nice oriental restaurant, having a great conversation, and me enjoying those wonderful eyes and boobies of hers, it occured to me: It's not age, but stage of life where we're disconnecting.

I'm 40, she's 29 -- that's not the issue, never has been. But I'm finally at the point in my life where I want to at least look at settling down. She's a free spirit, wants to join the Peace Corps, travel the world, etc. We're at different stages.

There could be 40-year old woman who is at the free spirit stage, just as there could be 21-year old women who is at the settle down stage.

It all has to do with timing -- being on the same track. We're not on the same track. I'll always stay in touch, but until we're on the same track, the potential for an LTR or even more, is futile.

 

[myfriendblu]

Re: It's not age, but stage -- of life, that is

Is age a factor in a womens looks? Without a doubt it is. As females age, their stock begins to drop. Its a fact of mother nature that you can't deny. I reckon a women hits her peak, looks wise, at about 21-22. Sure, there are 9's and 10's older than that, but not by much. A girl over 30 just can not compete, looks wise, with a 20 year old model. Just a fact of life that females need to understand.

Thats what great about being a guy. As we age, our stock goes UP. As we gain more power, wealth, knowledge and material things, our ability to land hotter and younger chiks goes up as well. Thats the one advantage, a big one, that we have over females.

 

[Falcon Eye]

Re: Re: It's not age, but stage -- of life, that is

Originally posted by myfriendblu
Is age a factor in a womens looks? Without a doubt it is. As females age, their stock begins to drop. Its a fact of mother nature that you can't deny. I reckon a women hits her peak, looks wise, at about 21-22. Sure, there are 9's and 10's older than that, but not by much. A girl over 30 just can not compete, looks wise, with a 20 year old model. Just a fact of life that females need to understand.

Thats what great about being a guy. As we age, our stock goes UP. As we gain more power, wealth, knowledge and material things, our ability to land hotter and younger chiks goes up as well. Thats the one advantage, a big one, that we have over females.

For the most part I agree with what you're saying. Men in their forties and fifties who take care of themselves and are in decent financial shape probably have more choices then a lot of women in their forties and fifties.

Women in their twenties seem to be more valuable then men of the same age, twenty years later there is probably a 180 degree shift. That said, give me a good mature forty something woman over a twenty something girl any day of the week and twice on Sundays.

 

[Eileen]

Originally posted by Big Pappy
Age is relative to a point

In Eileen's case, she can overcome a great many barriers with her style and substance. Looking 15 years younger than she really is doesn't hurt either.

Style and substance? Why thank you Big Pappy! And 15?? Really? I know I look younger than my years, but 15 years younger? I'll write the face cream company straight away. They should be thanked properly.

And what's this crock about no woman past her early 20's being a 9 or 10? Personally I think rating people that way is beyond shallow, but I see many women over the age of 30 who are quite attractive.

I won't disagree that it's not the norm though. Men do appear to age more gracefully than most women.

Edited to add: It's too bad not all men mature as they age.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by Eileen
And what's this crock about no woman past her early 20's being a 9 or 10? Personally I think rating people that way is beyond shallow, but I see many women over the age of 30 who are quite attractive.

I know, it sucks. Realistically, modern science with its hormone replacements/pills/plastic surgery is in its infancy, as in pre-historic times. 50 years from now, its gonna be amazing on how good science is with dealing with aging. Until then, were stuck with what we have today.

I will say this - at 36, selma hayek is one fine momma. Demi moore at 41 as well. Yummy

It all seems shallow, but its really not. Its science. Its evolution and basic instinct to be attracted to young, healthy looking females. Thats a few hundred thousand years of instinct that you can't fight against. Its a natural, good thing, if you learn to look at it from a realistic, scientific, fact-backing view-point.

 

[Eileen]

No, it's shallow. Don't look to science for an excuse. Humans have too much control over their thought process for that. If you were an earthworm, I might let you get away with it.

Don't start spewing scientific fact unless you can back it. I happen to know a thing or two about evolutionary biology.

 

[Dark Nimbus]

I'm in for a 25+ forum.

 

[Sting]

Originally posted by Eileen
No, it's shallow. Don't look to science for an excuse. Humans have too much control over their thought process for that. If you were an earthworm, I might let you get away with it.

Don't start spewing scientific fact unless you can back it. I happen to know a thing or two about evolutionary biology.

Actually, he's pretty accurate. Here's a link to a rather interesting paper on evolutionary biology by Dr. Geoffrey Miller of the University of New Mexico entitled " Review of Sexual Selection and Human Evolution: How Mate Choice shaped Human Nature"

http://psych.unm.edu/faculty/mate_choice.htm

And here's an excerpt that supports myfriendblu's post (although the latter part seems to explain while women are choosy):

The basic rationale is that random mating is stupid mating. It pays to be choosy because in a sexually reproducing species, the genetic quality of your mate will determine half the genetic quality of your offspring. Ugly, unhealthy mates yield ugly, unhealthy offspring. By forming a joint genetic venture with an attractive, high-quality mate, one's genes are much more likely to be passed on. Even modern women who deny the "role of genes in human behavior" tend to choose their sperm donors quite carefully (see Scheib, 1994). Mate choice is simply the best eugenics and genetic screening that female animals are capable of carrying out under field conditions, with no equipment but their senses and their brains.

Here's another interesting excerpt:

The human face is a major target of selective mate choice during all stages of courtship, from flirtation through face-to-face copulation. Research on human facial aesthetics has boomed in the last few years (Alley & Cunningham, 1991; Brown & Perrett, 1993; Langlois & Roggman, 1990; Perrett, May, & Yoshikawa, 1994), revealing that average faces are attractive, but that females with more `neotenous' (child-like) faces, including large eyes, small noses, and full lips, are still more attractive, as are males will testosterone-enlarged features such as high cheekbones, strong jaws, strong chins, and large noses (R. Thornhill & Gangestad, 1993). Bilateral symmetry is another important determinant of facial beauty, because symmetry correlates with "developmental competence"— resistance to disease, injury, and harmful mutations that cause "fluctuating asymmetry" during development (Moller & Pomiankowski, 1993; R. Thornhill & Gangestad, 1993). Also, as Darwin (1872) emphasized, human facial musculature is uniquely well-developed for displaying a variety of expressions, many of which are used in courtship.

And another:

Female human breasts and buttocks have undergone sexual elaboration through mate choice by males. These organs store substantial amounts of fat, so could function as indicators of female nutritional status and hence fertility (Low, Alexander, & Noonan, 1987; Szalay & Costello, 1992). Singh (1993) showed that males prefer women who display a low waist-to-hip ratio (WHR), ideally about 0.70, concordant with enlarged buttocks indicating sufficient fat reserves, and a narrow waist indicating non-pregnancy. Permanent enlargement of breasts and buttocks is also fairly effective at concealing ovulation (Margulis & Sagan, 1991; Szalay & Costello, 1992). Females who do not reveal their menstrual or lactational cycles may benefit from male uncertainty by being able to solicit male attention and investment even when they are not really fertile: "From hairy, flat-chested ape to modern buxom woman ... males were kept guessing about when females were ovulating" (Margulis & Sagan, 1991, p. 96). More generally, the loss of a specific estrus period, combined with `concealed ovulation' and `continuous sexual receptivity', may have allowed females to attract more continuous attention (e.g. protection, provisioning, social support) from males even when they were not ovulating (Alexander & Noonan, 1979; H. Fisher, 1982; Hrdy, 1981, 1988; Hrdy & Whitten, 1987; Tanner, 1981).

 

[Player_Supreme]

Yeah and we also need one for men around my age...late 30's and above!!!

When I first came here, I thought everyone was in their 20's 30's and 40's...it never occured to me that high school kids would come here...but that is why there is a special forum just for the younger players...

Now us older ones need ours!!

 

[Eileen]

Misuse of facts. Gotta love it.

If you check Dr. Millers work a little further you'd realize that words such as "ugly" and "healthy" have a different definition than you're trying to apply to them.

Ugly would indeed include physical deformities and the like and healthy would include things like fat.

The impacts of social influences were also all but ignored in this study. Tell me how can you ask a man in 1994 what he find attractive and be certain that it was not influenced by MTV? You can’t.

This is a gross misuse of a study that is not universally accepted anyway.

So let us that noodle of yours for something other than doing a google search and coming up with a study that I’m more familiar with that you are.

First, lets examine the fact that what was universally accepted as beauty for many centuries was a female body type that is much more robust than the ones found attractive today. Even during the 17th and 18th centuries men preferred a woman with more fat reserves than are accepted as beautiful by today’s standards. The change correlates directly with the invention of mass media. Coincidence? If the study of less sophisticated cultures in modern society has any impact I’d have to say no. Men in those 3rd world cultures still seem to prefer a more robust female. I guess they never read Playboy.

Secondly, if you dig a little deeper, you’ll find that it’s almost universally agreed that the woman had more to do with mate selection than did the male (this seems to be accurate even today). She carries this out more by preventing mating than by going out and hand picking, but I believe that even Dr. Miller agrees the female and not the male determine that sexual selection.

I could go on, but I’m tired. Let’s just conclude by saying I think you’re trying to twist facts to suit your purpose and it’s not going to work. To sum up: I’m not saying that evolution has nothing to do with mate selection. I’m saying that the definitions of words such as beauty and health are being misinterpreted.

But, if it makes you feel any better I do agree with Dr. Millers rational that “random mating is stupid.”

 

[myfriendblu]

Bla bla bla eileen,
face the facts: your over the hill, past your peak, and there are plenty of nubile, young attractive females walking around that make you seem invisible.

There was one GREAT, fact based study done recently on the coorelation of fertility and waiste size. Basically, scienctists have it down, to a near exact ratio, of a girls hip size and her ability to mate. Needless to say, it was a pretty slim female. I will have to dig it up.

You also know that females hit their fertility peak at 24 don't you? Every year after that, the chances of defects/miscarriages goes up.