i try to set up a date and she goes..

[mrben117]

"im not trying to avoid you and not hang out.. i just really am busy this week."

should i..

leave her alone for a while?
next her?

 

[Mr. Wolf]

Next her.. You should have done that a long time ago by the way, if she has to say that to you..

Whether she's saying truth or not, what she said is enough to drop all the interest on your part, and focus it on something else.. Even if she comes through later on.. Ideally you should have someone else later.. But if not, you should say you'd give it a thought.. Then call a date on your terms..



Leaving her alone, means, you are doing the coming back to her, not the other way around.. That is trully beta.. Don't do it.

 

[mrben117]

so i shouldn't ask her out again? let her initiate.. IF she does?

should i cut off all the conversations? (i.e. internet, phone calls)
because i certainly do not want to be JUST friends with her.

 

[Mr. Wolf]

She's testing you. And it's like this, if you contact her too soon, you failed and she nexts you.. If you wait several weeks and contact her, you neither failed nor passed her test.. If you wait until she contacts you, you have passed her test with flying colors..

Whatever NEXT means to you.

 

[mrben117]

alright thanks for your input, i appreciate it.

i'll do just that and to be honest, it's hard because i honestly am uncontrollably afc for her but it's time to man up and have the "i'm the prize" mentality!

 

[mrben117]

well danger don't you think that contradicts his advice a little bit. if i invite her to a social event with me and my friends, wouldn't that show her that i may still be interested?

do you suggest that i still talk to her? like i said, i don't just want to be friends with her. the friends zone is the most horrible thing imaginable.

 

[LostAndConfused]

I would either have nexted her or replied to that message saying, "Well, when you get your priorities straight hit me up on the cell," and not send her any messages after that. If she still has interest then she'll take that step, if not, then she's nexted.

 

[DJ1234]

"im not trying to avoid you and not hang out.. i just really am busy this week."
next her?

From this it sounds like she might be honest, but I wouldn't just wait around for her so that when SHE's Ready she can hang out with you...but no counter offer like how about next week?

I would really think about nexting her or going out with her on your terms and if she does that again, then i'd def. drop her...

 

[Obsidian]

Try her again two weeks from now on a Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday

In the meantime, find new chicks

 

[ready123]

jesus, don't fvckin next her

wtf is up with guys nexting every damn girl who doesn't breathe in their direction, it's hella retarded. it just shows a lack of experience and that you're so scared of being hurt you think you gain something by blowing yourself out before the girl has even given you a reason to do so

you ever figure the girl might genuinely be busy? don't you have other priorities in your life? work, school, hobbies family, other friends?

take her on her word unless you see a pattern otherwise or she explicity tells you no. if she had zero interest in you, she didn't have to give you a reason or a timeframe

 

[Mr. Wolf]

you ever figure the girl might genuinely be busy?

If girl is genuinely busy then she would have no problem making up to the guy.. Such as contacting him to set things up, instead of waiting for him to do that..

Nah, I don't think women are ever genuinely busy.. Not for me at least.. They can be genuinely busy for some beta guy, but when it comes to me I demand her to allocate time for me.. Otherwise she is screwing it up..

With YOUR mind set, she can never screw up.. Because you are always available.. Congratulations! You've ruined all the fun for a woman.. Now the only way she can enjoy you is by manipulating you, and making you wait for sex, if ever..

 

[PlaysToWin]

I reckon we're all fairly close to the same wavelength here, just different interpretations of what 'next'ing means.

If 'next' means you are ruling out any chance of anything in the future with her then I disagree with 'next'. I think it's a little rash. If 'next' just means to spin other plates while keeping the doors open if she ever gets back in contact with concrete plans, then I agree with next.

Basically, leave her alone. If she comes calling back next week then by all means entertain any suggested plans that she makes. Just don't make any plans of your own until she makes a solid plan and follows through with it and you have a good time.

And in the meantime, spin a few other plates to make sure you're not sitting waiting on her slowly developing onitis.

 

[ready123]

you don't gain anything from pushing for an egocentric reality. taking the alpha male thing to the extreme just reeks of insecurity and the only women that actually roll with it are the ones who have low self-esteem

it's not about looking unavailable and making her chase. it's about having enough social awareness that you don't act like a social retard. social retardation = blowing yourself out prematurely on some neutral sht and thinking it's cool because you're trying to maintain a strict alpha male image that only exists inside your head

quality women do not obey you, especially when they don't know you. that's common sense

 

[Mr. Wolf]

Telling her ok, I understand, why don't you call me when you get your qualities straight.. Is perfectly normal and makes it fun for a girl..

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Why not just ask her when she's free? With such a busy schedule she must know when she has time available. If she doesn't know, she's just not interested enough to tell you.