Hey guys been out of the dating game for 2 years busy with school and work and just started dating again. I consider myself a good looking guy but i always ruin it. On 3 occasions i was close to hooking up with 2 girl from school and 1 from online but since ive been single for a long time i didint realize i was coming off as desperate and needy with these girls because i wanted to get a gf badly and they simply lost interest. What can i do to stop getting so excited and acting desperate. Help
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I seem desperate?
- Thread starter Brught1
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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Wht did you do that was desperate?
gravityeyelids
Master Don Juan
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Yea itd be helpful if you elaborated a bit more and provided specifics. But either way guys typically make almost the exact same mistakes. And many of the members here are going to direct you to resources such as the DJ Bible. I'm also a fan of the following:
- The book of Pook
- 60 Years of Challenge (ebooks)
- Bradd80's thread on here (just google it, I can't remember the title off hand)
- Braddock's Guide to Text and Phone game
Whenever a girl seems really interested in me. I move way to fast and i start coming off as desperate. Thanka for the tips so far
dustmuffin
Master Don Juan
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Read the posts suggested. It will take time and practice to relax.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.