B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
telling this girl I used to date that my anxiety ruined our relationship. I can't stand the thought of her thinking I'm weak. How do I deal with this?
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
I regret...
- Thread starter B0redandl0nely
- Start date
“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
Dash Riprock
Master Don Juan
By doing nothing. Move on. It's over. Learn and get better. The more you try to "fix" things, the bigger hole you'll dig. By anxiety, do you mean PA or general anxiety? And if she left you because of it (either issue) she's the one with the problem not you. No one's perfect.
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
I can't deal with it being over. She tried so hard to make it work but I put this emotional wall up. I wasn't dealing with my issues and that's my problem, not hers. I'm a man and I'm supposed to be a protector and provider. And I wanna be alpha too but I'm aspergers. I feel like im an alpha soul trapped in an aspergers mind. The anxiety was general.
You decide on the best course of action to best repair your personal issues for the next girl. It may even go as far as requiring psych therapy and/or professionally prescribed drugs in that process.
Your admission of your anxiety issue was taken as a sign of personal weakness with this girl…
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
I don't want another girl...
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
and I can't deal with her thinking I'm weak...
Dash Riprock
Master Don Juan
Ok, your best bet then is to go NC for a least a few months to try and get her to miss you. This does work sometimes. Then, reach out, and ask her to do something non-romantic like lunch to "catch up." See where it goes, but DON'T PUSH or get NEEDY. You'll kill it. Remember, full NC for now. Good luck.
That’s an anxiety driven response. Deal with that issue.
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
and?
Dash Riprock
Master Don Juan
You're not "Weak." We all have issues. She'll think you're weak if you PUSH, keep contacting her, or acting all NEEDY. Date other women to practice and get your mojo back. I know Asperger's is tough and can make relationships challenging, but we all have our s*hit to deal with.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
Cant do that sorry...
Murk
Master Don Juan
Then continue to stress and worry, just don’t harm yourself.
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
I want her back
Regret is Always about the past. Recognize the past for what it was and was not, and live in the present while continuing to improve yourself for your future…
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Vantagepoint34
Master Don Juan
OP you are fine the way you are. No need to waste money on anything. You are who you are and you don't need to change for anyone. Strength in our society is just non existant. Most decisions are made passively because you gave no importance to begin with. Live on brother!
B0redandl0nely
Senior Don Juan
I'm not fine the way I am. What do you mean gave no importance? The regret I feel for the decision I made is very important to me...