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I pass tests, but don't really like to

El Roi

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I wanna get back to responding to challenges because they're opportunities to joke around/amuse myself and others around me rather than viewing a test as a line drawn in the sand to see if I'll pass it. When I see it that way I don't even enjoy passing.

I get "that's how it is..." blah blah, I know. Haha. I'm talking about mindset.

I enjoy unsaid verbal games because they're fun/competitive and opportunities for satire/connection (with people in general, not even just chicks). But when a girl does it that's no longer my gut-level instinct.

Experience, examples, thoughts?

EDIT: I've realized more clearly what my desire is from this post.

What I hope to gain insight on from this post is this specifically: My instinct toward tests is negative, so now I just say words that pass the test. But when I do that it's ingenuine. I don't like that. That tells me there's something wrong with my beliefs/perspective.

I used to take on challenges playfully with joy. That seems to be the proper mode of being in a situation like that.

So for you, do you have any experience, examples, or thoughts on how to overcome that? Have you had to deal with the same thing?
 
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El Roi

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Thanks for the response, @Pan87. I'm familiar with the communication style but the mindset shift I've noticed has been subpar for how I believe things should be. So I especially appreciate the recommendation. That should help assess that.
 

SargeMaximus

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I also hate sh!t tests. I prefer to fail them and get the woman away from me than jump through her hoops. I know I could be so much better at game if I learned how to pass them, but my disdain at an emotional level will not allow me to
 

El Roi

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The mindset shift isn't easy because you have to essentially develop a feminine mindset to understand it. The key is develop this emotional awareness, but still maintain your masculinity. If you get too deep into subcommunication then you become a woman, which is bad for male/female polarity. The goal is to develop awareness of subcommunication without turning into a woman.
What I mean is that, if I notice that when a girl challenges me I experience negative emotions, I need to grow somehow.

Used to I enjoyed challenges because they were opportunities for fun. But I started viewing them as a woman vetting me which turns my view of them sour. I pass most of the time no problem: my mouth utters words that fill in the gap with a response that works. But with the current perception of tests and why they happen, I don't enjoy that.

My current responses are a break in real communication for me. I just say what works rather than answer that's unconcerned and one that takes joy in a playful challenge.
 
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SargeMaximus

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The problem with this is you are doing exactly what a woman wants you to do - becoming frustrated and failing her sh1ttests is exactly the Beta confirmation she is looking for, so she can filter you out as a sexual option.
The way I see it, I ultimately win since women are a headache.
 

SargeMaximus

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What I mean is that, if I notice that when a girl challenges me I experience negative emotions, I need to grow somehow.

Used to I enjoyed challenges because they were opportunities for fun. But I started viewing them as a woman vetting me. I pass most of the time no problem. But with the current perception of tests and why they happen, I don't enjoy passing.
Isn’t this qualifying yourself to a girl?
 

SargeMaximus

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Taking the BlackPill and going MGTOW is an option for you. Many guys find the way women communicate to be very frustrating. Which is kinda the point. So, if you find women are a headache then she's won because she's basically disqualified you from the small pool of men who "get it" i.e. Understand what women are.
Yeah I’m not taking that bait. I don’t have the desire to jump through hoops because a woman thinks she is worthy.
 

derby1

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loads of beta males who wouldnt even know how to handle a **** test, get women still.

so I wouldnt over analyse it too much.
 

El Roi

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Isn’t this qualifying yourself to a girl?
That's what the effect of the test impacts the girl with. But I'm saying that I do pass them, and that doesn't involve qualifying myself. A decent amount of times that involves me disqualifying myself.

It's like a girl may say "I don't know if we'll work out." Then grinning and turning away, "yeahhh maybe not, ur right" lol
 

SargeMaximus

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That's what the effect of the test impacts the girl with. But I'm saying that I do pass them, and that doesn't involve qualifying myself. A decent amount of times that involves me disqualifying myself.

It's like a girl may say "I don't know if we'll work out." Then grinning and turning away, "yeahhh maybe not, ur right" lol
Yeah that’s what I do only I just don’t try to pass the test at all. Or like a few times girls ask me how big my thing is and I say “like a baby carrot”
 

SargeMaximus

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This type of combative attitude is scary for women. It's not about a woman thinking "she's worthy". It's simply about knowing how to turn a woman on.

For example, if your car breaks down do you say "my car isn't worthy of being fixed"? No, you fix the car so you can drive it. Similar with women. See a woman as a car that needs to have its engine fiddled with so that you can drive it - it's a win, win.

Sitting around in a broken car thinking "fvck this car, why won't it just drive itself" is going to get you nowhere.
Except I’ve gotten laid plenty of times where I never had to pass a sh!t test at all. I see it more like her loss if she’s too clueless to realize I’m better than her options
 

El Roi

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loads of beta males who wouldnt even know how to handle a **** test, get women still.

so I wouldnt over analyse it too much.
That's good, @derby1. Thanks for the reply. I definitely agree bro.

What I hope to gain insight on from this post is this specifically: My instinct toward tests is negative, so now I just say words that pass the test. But when I do that it's ingenuine. I don't like that. That tells me there's something wrong with my beliefs/perspective.

I used to take on challenges playfully with joy. That seems to be the proper mode of being in a situation like that.

So for you, do you have any experience, examples, or thoughts on how to overcome that? Have you had to deal with the same thing?
 

SargeMaximus

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Your posts don't line up with this. If you consistently got what you wanted from women, then you wouldn't be frustrated by them. What's actually happening is you are primarily failing sh1t tests and not getting laid.
I have gotten laid, just not as much as I’d like. And I did say I would have more success with women if I passed the sh!t tests, but it’s not one or the other, I’ve gotten laid plenty of times in my life not having to pass anything. If a girl likes you enough, she will ignore your bad qualities ime
 

SargeMaximus

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How can a woman decide she likes you without testing you? This is fundamental. Especially if she's an attractive woman with options.

Sure, maybe you tripped over and fell into a few pu$$ies through blind luck and chance. But you can get a reliable, high quality and steady supply of vagina by learning how to have fun with her testing and vetting, and not seeing it as some kind of attack on your manhood.
Well like I said, it’s an issue of mine. I can’t stand it. Drives me insane. I dont think I had a gf for over a year out of luck tho.
 

2Rocky

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**** Tests accomplish a few things....

1) see if the guy has a sense of humor
2) see if he takes himself too seriously
3) see if he has a fragile ego
4) see if he can think quick on his feet.
5) see if he seeks approval
6) see if he is smart enough to see through the BS and read between the lines.
 

derby1

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They don't "get" women. They become Providers. This doesn't turn women on. Women actually hold Providers in contempt.
Who cares theyre still getting laid, its purely a numbers game

Ive had women mess me about when my game is tight, and ive had women pull their pants down when ive been a giggly goofy mess.

its all total nonsense, she either fancies you and is mentally stable or she doesnt.

and this alpha BS needs to stop.
 

SargeMaximus

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As Derby said, the Beta Method can still get you a gf. But you're not getting the best out of her and you're not turning her on. And predictably the relationship doesn't last. Learning how to communicate with women, and thus turning her on, gives you a nice car that doesn't break down on you all the time.
Ok, but \/


5) see if he seeks approval
6) see if he is smart enough to see through the BS and read between the lines.
Since I DONT seek her approval and see through her BS, I don't play the game and don't pass the test because I don't want her approval. So That should be the ultimate passing, no?
 

Velasco

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1) see if the guy has a sense of humor
2) see if he takes himself too seriously
3) see if he has a fragile ego
4) see if he can think quick on his feet.
5) see if he seeks approval
6) see if he is smart enough to see through the BS and read between the lines
So if your a funny guy who doesn't take himself or her seriously, then sht tests wouldn't bother you (would make you laugh actually). You just know how to react.
 

SargeMaximus

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As you want something from her (sex), then you are seeking something from her = a green light to insert your pink tictac into her. You can't escape that. She has something that you want (a vagina).

You are seeking something from her, but you want to at least appear like you're outcome independent. So, you approach her, display, try to close, and if she's not buying then you move onto the next target without letting it frustrate or damage your ego.

The key is to approach, display and communicate with her in a way that maximizes your chances.
OK well in my experience it doesn’t work anyways because they just ramp up the **** testing higher and higher until you actually fail.
 

El Roi

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So if your a funny guy who doesn't take himself or her seriously, then sht tests wouldn't bother you (would make you laugh actually). You just know how to react.
Just for everyone to see: Bingo. This is what I'm talking about. This is what I currently do but isn't genuine. Used to it was genuine. So far I've gotten a book recommendation. Anyone else have any insight, advice, experience with this, examples, etc.?
 
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