"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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I only like girls I can't get

wiggadude

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Ever since I can remember I've always been attracted to the girls I know I can't get. In college, several pretty good looking girls wanted me, but I rejected them. If I feel that I can get them, I lose interest.

WTF. How do I fix this???
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Luveno

Master Don Juan
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"...I know I can't get"

That's your problem right there
 

BLUEox117

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Originally posted by Luveno
"...I know I can't get"

That's your problem right there
to elaborate,

by saying i "know" i cant get them, you are implying that they are better than you, you are acting like a loser, and ruining your chances before u even start the game.
 

wiggadude

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Sorry, I must clarify.

I only like girls where I have ALREADY FOUND OUT that I can't get them.

In most cases, they are not single (LTR), or are not at all my type. i.e. I hate their personality, but I love their imaginary image that I have in my head.
 

Double J

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I know what you're saying. I've been through it too - wanting the unobtainable. But there's nothing really left to do than move on and find a girl that's available man. You don't want to invest your time in someone who can't give you what you seek.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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johnny_chase

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Originally posted by wiggadude
or are not at all my type. i.e. I hate their personality, but I love their imaginary image that I have in my head.
So stop building up imaginary images in your head. If you hate their personality already, what is the problem here? Imaginary image? I'm sorry, but this issue is all about you.

And second, so what if they have bf's, dont matter, are you going to treat them a different way? Like you see one you like and you're like: okay, i'm going to DJ this chick. No.

You DJ every chick, it becomes part of your personality, to become desired by all women you meet.
 

Donald Kaufman

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I don't know that this is true in your case but I've seen guys who become more interested, or who don't lose interest as fast, when they discover a girl is less available.

In many of those cases I think fear is a major part of the problem. Can't screw up what can't be so it remains perfect, and they remain perfectly miserable, but don't have to take responsibility because the women are unavailable.

Casually associating with women who aren't what you are really interested in can alleviate the fear.

Unfortunately, I have seen some of the guys settle way, way, way below their potential and others marry the first girl they try to associate casually with.

Ultimately, if fear is part of the problem the long term answer is to deal with it directly, then try associating with eyes wide open.
 
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