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I need to un**** my life

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
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After a decade long relationship to a good women. I moved back home.

Now jobless and living with family , I got into a relationship with a women that mangled my brain.

So here I am..... 37.

1. Physically not in the best shape. I'm on the slimmer side (although I do lift quite a lot).

My body is tight. My posture isn't great.

2. I don't have a job. I've been jobless for 3 years. Before that I did a part-time job which I quit after a year and a half.

A number of years of joblessness before that.

I'm an aerospace space engineer originally. Did that for 10 years before company closure and getting made redundant.

In all honesty I got lazy when I was made redundant. I had lots in the bank, got depressed after applying for loads of jobs and gave up.

3. Living with family. This is my easiest fix. I own a nice property outright. I'm currently renting it out because I can't afford to live on my owns and need the cash it brings in.

As soon as I have income, I'll get my house back.


4. I no longer have reliable friends or a social circle. I've been away from this place for 8 years. People have moved on. .
I've tried to reach out and connect. Seems like I need. To build a new social circle.

I fish (so can meet new friends this way), I'm in a dog club, I have a small circle to socialise with there.

5. Women. Despite all the above I'm alright looking and can hold my own socially.

I can do well with women.

My main problem is because my life is currently out of sync I feel like I need to fill it with affection from women.

I have nothing going on and it just feels good when that need gets met.

This flip side this makes me vunrable and I can't take anymore heartbreak.


I need a plan to turn this around.

Not looking for a pitty party . I just need perspective and focus.
This is not that bad. You have rental property. Fix the job thing first and start lifting regularly. Stay fit. Go from there.
 

Jake_Gyllenhaal69

Master Don Juan
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Don't be sad, there are plenty of people in similar positions and even worse. Also, don't try and swallow the elephant whole lol. First thing is first, figure out what you can control right now and start from there.
 

manfrombelow

Master Don Juan
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OP, when you're at your lowest, don't step into any kind of relationship. Yes you can have casual sex if you can (why not?), but don't look for anything any further. The top priority should be your own development & growth - nothing more.
 

CaptFinnBad

Don Juan
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Dec 14, 2021
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Quick update... So my situation hasn't changed that much.

Talked to a good friend (I actually worked alongside him in the aerospace industry). He gave be a bit of clarity.

He's got a well paid job, same background/experience e.t.c. The only difference between us two is our attitude.

He was a little condescending which I found amusing. His advice go down the career path, make finding a job a full time job e.t.c.

I told him I'm focusing on health right now. Meditation, yoga, gym , dog training, learning about finances , my side hustle and my website.

He got really snotty with me! Then some comments, "we all can't be fortunate enough like you and sit around and do **** all with your life".

Then a funny one, "You can't buy beans with those biceps".

I've also been looking at getting second property (it's actually viable). I mentioned (when he calmed down) that would be my plan in the future.

Well that didn't go down well!!! I may as well told him I ****ed his wife and his child was really mine!!!! Lol

Anyways I think is attitude towards me was because dispite being a lazy bum in his eyes. I'm actually kicking his ass , he's in debt, doesn't own his house , has no assets , dispute working like a dog. Plus he looks like **** (haha and he knows I could probably **** his wife if I wanted:rofl::rofl: ).

His insecure rants and the fact he has zero time to himself, no real assets, and doesn't have time look after himself, and thinks everyone should be a good boy just like him be a career man (he's miserable and bitter ) made me think when I got home.

I asked myself would I trade lives with him or anyone I know that's on this path , the answer was a sure "no", this gave me a bit clearity.

I NOW have the clarity and certainly to live exactly how I want and do what I believe will make me happy.

1. **** the career
2. **** getting a average job (not paid enough, not going to work for someone else).
3. I'm going to hustle, I'm smart enough and I believe capable enough(it's something I think I'll regret if I don't do).


Short term goals.
1. Health and wellbeing
2. Dog training
3. My gambling side hustle (litrerally no real gambling involve). I'm focusing hard on this right now. It's bringing in much more than rental income and more than a regular job (currently working on efficiency).

It has a potential life span. But I'm working out ways to make it a permanent thing with only a hour or so time investment per day. I love doing it, if feels like a game.

4. Website. Is more of an enjoyment thing too. No profits, I'm going it for fun, and learning. Although it has potential to become a decent passive income stream.

If it does I'll create more. This is just a hobby.

5. Focusing hard on dog training. People think it's a bit extreme the hours in putting in with my pet dog. The way I see it I'm training with elite dog professionals and trainer's for practically free. Mabye 16 hours a week.

It's basically dog college for me. I'm learning from the best of the best. As I plan to go into dogs as a professional I'm classing this as my education.

6. Dog business is all set up (as in I can start whenever). I haven't started advertising yet. I actually need to learn that side of the business.

I'm holding off because I'm focusing, dog training and getting my other income stream efficient (so it will be super sustainable and time efficient when I'm doing other things )

Possibly in February I'll start my dog walking business.

Money.
Right now I'm living off the rental income. I'm not touching the other income.

Basically I'm letting it gown and add to my savings.

I could use it to move back into my property but I'm not going to do that. The plan is to build up my savings pot.

As silly as this might sound . I'm using it to save for another property ( as in buy it outright like I did with my current one ). Although this time I'm looking for something a lot cheaper than what I currently have. I'll either move into the cheap one and get big rent from property number 1. Or live in the better property and get small rent from number 2.

Mabye I'll get a mortgage when I'm more stable mabye I won't and will just buy it outright. I don't know yet .

Just going to be a small cheap appartnent that's run down which I can renevate myself. So not that expensive. Already have a chunk of the money needed. Just need more.

My dog walking business will allow me to move home and other sources of income will be going towards assets.


Long term

Who knows. A 3rd property? Definitely want to transition into dog training!

Also I still like the idea of employing a team to dog walkers.

And really want that dog daycare/training facility I always dream about.


Hurdles....

I think my biggest hurdle is going to believe in myself and not listen to ****ty advise or other people projecting their insecurities on me.

So I guess it's about being sure of myself and doing exactly what I feel is right and going for it dispite what people tell me I can't or can do.


I'm very happy lately. I feels like I'm on my path and believe I can make a lot of money by doing what makes me happy.

I know I'll be miserable in a career or a job. I hate it. So I'm not going to do it.
 
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CaptFinnBad

Don Juan
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Still haven't started my business.

Making decent money each day though. Doing the math it's more than I would be making in a 9 to 5 job. So **** that.

This has given my some breathing space.

Gym is going REALLY well! Starting to look and feel strong again. Not near my former glory but getting there. I feel it snowballing for sure.

Not managed to stay away from women. You guys are probably right but I'm weak and can't help myself.

I want to put time into my website. I'm intrigued to see if I can make this work. Completely ignored it and been focusing on money from my easy hustle.


Definitely need to start my business in the next month or so. Which will add something with a bit of legitimacy regarding income.

Can't be relying on playing on the internet for money for ever as I do want to get away from screens.

So dogs will provide balance.
 
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