I may be not suited to have success with cold approaches

[plumber]

black belt in Tae Kwon Do is in surviving a street brawl I.E. A scenario where a strong stomach/readiness to commit grisly acts ultimately carries more weight than practicing katas down at The YMCA

A different opinion. eh.... bjj guys know to get in close fast.. or else.

• Unmatched Kinetic Power: Studies tracking martial arts strikes consistently show that Taekwondo’s turning kicks and spinning back kicks generate some of the highest impact forces ever recorded, often equivalent to a small car crash.
• The "Sport vs. Combat" Misconception: People often judge Taekwondo by Olympic sparring, where fighters wear heavy padding and bounce around to score quick, light touch-points. That is a rule set, not the limit of the martial art's actual power.
• Range and Leverage: Taekwondo maximizes hip rotation and body weight placement. A person who has never stood on the receiving end of a proper spinning heel kick or thrusting side kick cannot truly grasp how easily those strikes can break ribs or cause instant knockouts.

 

[BaronOfHair]

@plumber "a different opinion. eh.... bjj guys know to get in close fast.. or else"

I'm not a parishoner in The Church Of Gracie either. Point is:

Height is similar to having a few billion hours worth of MA training, which is to say, NOT especially beneficial, unless it's accompanied with traits like courage and psychological hardiness. Lots of men who are 6'0 and over allow dread of being rejected to paralyze them, rarely if ever pursue the women they desire subsequently

 

[Sega Genesis]

@Cheeky_James recently posted a video of a guy using IMO an effective style of cold approach which doesn't make it appear like a cold approach at all!

He is very direct but it's done in a very calibrated, authentic and natural way... imo.

Oops sorry guys. It was @nicksaiz65 who posted the video - A.G.Hayden.

@jhonny9546 might be helpful. Spontaneous, free-flowing, fun (C&F) conversation versus canned lines or a forced strategy which can come off stiff and well, phony.

Same way you talk to girls in your social circle group. Spontaneously and naturally.

Just my take! As the recipient of your CAs.

There are some nice infields on this channel.

 

[Cheeky_James]

@jhonny9546
Maybe try this approach style instead ?
Check out this old PUA Legend ‘Yad’ and his London DayGame method…

Gotta say, the comments section of this video had me in tears laughing

 

[nicksaiz65]

Oops sorry guys. It was @nicksaiz65 who posted the video - A.G.Hayden.

@jhonny9546 might be helpful. Spontaneous, free-flowing, fun (C&F) conversation versus canned lines or a forced strategy which can come off stiff and well, phony.

Same way you talk to girls in your social circle group. Spontaneously and naturally.

Just my take! As the recipient of your CAs.

There’s a lot of infield uploaded here, it can be a useful reference for what a good approach should look like!

 

[nicksaiz65]

@jhonny9546
Maybe try this approach style instead ?
Check out this old PUA Legend ‘Yad’ and his London DayGame method…

Gotta say, the comments section of this video had me in tears laughing

It always comes back to this video

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Here's what I'll say...

One of my clients was saying that what I told him to say as an opener during his approaches wasn't working. So I asked him to record the audio and send it to me...

He was saying the line...but he made his own adjustments to the wording. He was rushing through the conversation like he was reading a script and needed to check boxes off to make sure he hit all the relevant topics. He was talking about himself, and then would go into interview mode while disqualifying himself so that she could agree and also disqualify him.

You won't know what your problem REALLY is just by telling the forum what you THINK your problem is.

Also, what works for one person won't always work for someone else if it doesn't play to their strengths.

But to your point, 93% of communication is non-verbal so I'm also going to assume his body language was probably all wrong in addition to his tonality, and robot like delivery which made the words he actual said almost irrelevant

 

[Gamisch]

Also, what works for one person won't always work for someone else if it doesn't play to their strengths.

But to your point, 93% of communication is non-verbal so I'm also going to assume his body language was probably all wrong in addition to his tonality, and robot like delivery which made the words he actual said almost irrelevant

Dude shouldn't do cold approaches.

It's simply ain't for him.

 

[Arete]

Hi!

Those who know me know I'm short, but attractive.

The most important factor is precisely because I'm short; this kills the cold approach.

But my attractiveness, charisma, and interests lead women to feel attracted over time, both while we're dating and after they've gotten to know me, for common reasons (like being in the same social circle, hanging out with friends, and sharing activities and hobbies).

At this point, the possibility of getting a yes is unlocked for me, and in fact, approaching women after a month or two of knowing each other has always yielded positive results.

In fact, sometimes they'll simply start to let me know, usually within two months of seeing each other in a group.

Do you think I'll ever have any hope with the cold approach, or should I just give up?

Women are attracted to me, but they don't want to show it because the first time they see you, they feel attracted to my beauty and charisma, but at the same time they feel rejected by my short height.

Dead hang after you finish your main workout. At least 60 seconds after every single training session before you leave the gym.

Wear barefoot shoes everywhere except when you do approaches. But don't overdo it if you're not used to it.

Do couch stretches and either pike stretches or plow pose before sleeping.

Talking from experience. I didn't do it for height. My posture was once extremely bad, and I also had joint pain too.

I noticed my now decent posture makes me appear much taller, and I actually got taller for real. Like measurably.

And arguably more importantly, those 3 exercises are everything you will ever need for mobility. Most flexibility routines are a sham. You don't need to spend hours stretching with a hundred different fluff exercises.

Asside from that, cant you just cant get some extra cushioned sport shoes specificly for cold aproaches? They usually have more stack height than most other types of shoes. But I wouldn't recommend wearing them regularly. Contrary to popular belief, they ruin your ankles over time.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Dude shouldn't do cold approaches.

It's simply ain't for him.

Well...I would say that if you do something starting out you've never really done before and expect that you are going to be any form of competent at it, you are probably setting yourself up with unrealistic expectations.

Just like when I look back at some of the code I wrote and my thought processes from 20 years ago, I almost want to cry and laugh at the same time because it was so ridiculous and terrible.

But those were the building blocks to get to where I am now, and by having to figure all that stuff out on my own, it significantly helped me over the long run.

Removing the "struggle" someone has just starting out isn't helping them in the long run. It's crippling them. That struggle is where they learn the most fundamental lessons that will help them later wherever they end up at. Assuming they take them for what they are worth, experiences to learn from and not continue to make the same mistakes over and over again.

And that doesn't mean I don't think we should offer them tips and tricks and ways to learn from others mistakes instead of their own. They definitely should use those lessons others have learned. But they still have to go through the process and actually implement those...learning "what to do" isn't enough, they have to both actually do it and learn how they can implement it into their own process.

So should he "stop"? I don't think that's valid until he has shown a significant commitment to the process and to putting in the necessary effort and work that will likely take hundreds of approaches over many months or even years to become anything close to good/confident/knowledgeable, etc...

Now if he says he has approached thousands of women and still is doing that, then that is a totally different conversation. That warrants looking at his process and what he does with the feedback he receives. But until he gets to that point, he hasn't had enough "Time on Task" to justify him thinking he "should" be good at it, nor enough to think he should just quit. At the end of the day, that's the only sure fire way he will never improve

 

[BPH]

@jhonny9546 I want you to take a look at your recent activity.

You've made SEVERAL threads over the last 2 weeks, to the point where at least HALF of The Mature Man subforum's posts are ones you created, in addition to the ones you're starting in Don Juan Discussion, and even digging up a post that's 4 YEARS OLD.

I want you to be open to the possibility that your deep, long-winded, overly analytical behavior isn't too far off from how you behave in the real world when you talk to women.

If I were you, I would focus on THAT problem, since you can't do anything about your height. Also, go to the gym.

 

[BaronOfHair]

@jhonny9546 FWIW:

Height isn't even as male-centric a dilemma as we often imagine. As of this writing, average female height is 5'6, and a large percentage of the female population clocks in at several inches below that... Sarah Shahi, Salma Hayek, Amanda Seyfried, Sydney Sweeney, Carla Gugino, Liz Hurley, Kelly Brook, Keeley Hazell, Nats Martinez&Dormer, Gillian Anderson, Julianne Moore, Lucy Hale, and sh-ttons more who I'm not currently recalling are 5'5-much shorter

They've all similarly had to work around not having legs like JLaw, by throwing on heels/making peace with and working what they've got

 

[jhonny9546]

Bro, you will only get ONE life! No hearts, no continue or cheat codes. One life. Are you gonna sit and whine about - fill in deficiency- or you gonna go balls to the wall and be UNAPOLOGETICALLY you while you build an even better version of you????

Thanks for the message.
The process has started, but I still remember that I didn't had the chance to grow up in a good environment so I'm using any of my skill to keep improving everyday

If you can walk up to someone with a smile

I do mate

But a successful cold approach is measured by a woman's enjoyment from the interaction.

Yes, that's my pov

wait for her response

That was just in order to bring an example here on the forum.
Of course my conversation is natural and absent of scripted PUA lines.

Learn to be calibrated, authentic and comfortable in your own skin. Versus following some prepared line or 'script.'

This is what I do

Oops sorry guys. It was @nicksaiz65 who posted the video - A.G.Hayden.

@jhonny9546 might be helpful. Spontaneous, free-flowing, fun (C&F) conversation versus canned lines or a forced strategy which can come off stiff and well, phony.

Same way you talk to girls in your social circle group. Spontaneously and naturally.

Just my take! As the recipient of your CAs.

Thanks for the video, even tho I'm in Italy, that is what we actually do to.
I'm not confident as that guy, for real, but I'm not an AFC either.
I want to say that I'm in the middle of it, and that I can continue to improve my confidence

Dude shouldn't do cold approaches.

It's simply ain't for him.

But even I know that, I'm still doing it.
Like @BackInTheGame78 said I actually saw a bit of improvement in the last two years.

Your words are saying I should focus on other kind of approaches

 

[jhonny9546]

If I were you, I would focus on THAT problem, since you can't do anything about your height. Also, go to the gym.

You're not wrong; I like discovering things and educating myself.

Asking questions isn't a problem.
In fact, I should really acknowledge that I have this innate curiosity about things—which might offer clues as to the kind of woman I’d get along with.

Also, I do go to the gym, man.

 

[Cheeky_James]

@jhonny9546

Re your opener .
“Hey, I just saw you and I saw you're looking good"

Drop this. Don’t lead with a compliment.
Every dude that is out there is doing this , including the taller ones. If you do this you’re competing next to them - therefore your chances are very slim.

try open with something more snappy and with more commanding /authority tonality.
have more ‘boss’ in your voice. More volume.

for daygame you may want to try to go indirect and try to get her to comply and invest.
And drop some kind of bull**** status bait /value - tell her your a DJ or a club promoter or whatever might hook her.

my short badboy friend D’s openers were;

“hey! Where ya going?”
“Stop! Security check !”
And my favorite for taller girls
“Wow! Why are you so tall?!”

his voice had authority in it - hed open with a strong commanding “Hey” , and he’d make them explain themselves / qualify off the bat .

It worked quite well.

if he ever opened with a compliment it was in a fake tonality and a very over-the-top way.

“omg! Your so gor-ge-ousssssss!”
Over the top Don Juan energy, mock “I’m in love” energy type deal.

He was always taking the piss and having fun and self amusing and testing how much he could get away with. He used various “shticks” and he was also a great teaser. All in all I’d say he displayed lots of dominant and masculine traits.

Perhaps go back to mystery method and try that as a basis to try make chicks invest time.

Being direct and ‘authentic’ and leading with compliments doesn’t work in DayGame afaics. …it’s too basic and boring.
And it’s not great in NightGame either…
I’ve pulled more with Cavemanning and push-pull flirting in nightgame tbh.

 

[MatureDJ]

Those who know me know I'm short, but attractive.

Time for someone here to experience the HeightPill: