She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
If she does b) and lies about seeing another guy how is OP supposed to know that she is lying so as not to trust her?pyros said:I would ask her about it.
By doing this she can either:
a) confess she's seing some other guy
b) lie about the fact that she is seing another guy
c) tell you another reason you did not even think about it
If she does a) or b) you know you cant trust her, so up to you.
.[/U][/I]
sylvester the cat said:If she does b) and lies about seeing another guy how is OP supposed to know that she is lying so as not to trust her?
Surely b) and c) are one and the same?
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Jaylan said:EDIT: just saw OPs update.
Dude bail. If this girl is guilt tripping you and saying things that bother you, just bail. Plus shes hiding her online status, especially when thats your main mode of talking. I would just beat her to the punch and leave.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
She has what's called the contrast effect... Which means she is internally comparing you to someone who you are in competition with. Also track her cycle...soulforge said:This is the first girl I've gotten serious about in ages... I, m feeling kind of hurt to be honest..
Did I do something bad? She said something that pizzed me off and upset me, so I called her out on it..
I have been nice to her, looked after her... but that does not mean I will tolerate bad behaviour!
Then she twist it all around and make me out to be insensitive and uncaring.. She accused me of not treating her like a guest in my house..
I have cooked many meals for this chick, looked after her everytime she came over.. then she throws this accusation in my face!!
I,m feeling somewhat hurt man!!!
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I wouldnt be surprised if you picked a fight as 'payback' because you spent the build-up to the date stressing over the fact she doesn't give you the constant attention you crave.soulforge said:My doubts about this girl are developing even further.. she stopped at my house at the weekend..
She said said something to me that pizsed me off, so I called her on it... anyhow she started to guilt trip me, claiming I am not sensitive about her feelings and I should treat her better, as she is a guest in my house..
Guest or no guest, if a girl dis respects me or pissess me off, then I, m going to call her out.. simple as that!!
She then tried her best to manipulate me into believing it was all my fault, and I hurt her feelings.. I have so far treated this girl pretty good.. taken her out, cooked for her etc etc
Now she claims I,m not nice to her... I get the feeling this girl could be a manipulater...
She is acting distant on whatsapp, not talking as much..
even tho I like her.. 2 months in.. I, m thinking off dropping this chick.. I am sensing trouble ahead..
Also I met this chick on POF
We didnt even have the argument till the saturday night... she stopped over at my place from friday afternoon.. so get it right pal..OnTheRun said:I wouldnt be surprised if you picked a fight as 'payback' because you spent the build-up to the date stressing over the fact she doesn't give you the constant attention you crave.
Maybe this girl wasn't on Whatsapp for a few hours because she's a grown-up with a life? Maybe when she arrived at your house she expected to meet a grown man she could have a good time with, but- perhaps not for the first time- you were mardy and childish and made her feel uncomfortable?