i keep getting rejected

[konmai]

how do you guys handle it? i'm close to not even having an ego left.

 

[VladPatton]

You blow it off, reset yourself, and go again. However, make sure you're not setting YOURSELF up for these rejections. You can't complain about losing a paintball tournament if you go there with a slingshot and the other guys have mad fast guns.

 

[betheman]

how do you guys handle it? i'm close to not even having an ego left.

How old are you? not having any ego helps, seriously, see it for what it is, stop saying rejection, stop beating yourself up, you struck out, learn, you will be doing somethng wrong, read up on this site.

 

[Kbomb]

how do you guys handle it? i'm close to not even having an ego left.

All these girls are doing is obliterating the bullsh^t you built your ego on before, which is just showing how weak your own self-belief is/was. They are addressing the real you, while you are addressing the fantasy version of you.

Your new ego and confidence will be rock solid as it is based on real achievement and progress, and not on entitlement and self-pity. You have to rebuild yourself, and ultimately they are doing you a favor.

 

[perseverance]

I get rejected a lot.

But I don't care, I know my self-worth, I know I'm a f*cking top quality fella. I was in a coffee shop a few months ago when I saw a girl who rejected me across the room with her fella and she looked miserable as hell, I walked out the coffee shop with a huge smile on my face. The fella couldn't even bother to put some some attire on, he was wearing trackie bottoms and a sports top. If that was girl was my girlfriend, we would be having a morning f*ck session, nevermind a coffee.

Best of luck to her though, I wish her all the best for the future.

 

[Chamber36]

You blow it off, reset yourself, and go again. However, make sure you're not setting YOURSELF up for these rejections. You can't complain about losing a paintball tournament if you go there with a slingshot and the other guys have mad fast guns.

I agree.

When these girls can see from a mile off that you want to ask them out or ask for their number it takes away the mystery, and if you're predictable the chance you'll get rejected will be much higher.

I have experienced nights while working in a night-club that all the women would disrespect me, and then the hottest girl of all would suddenly give me IOI's.

It is a numbers game to a certain extent. Just make sure you look your best and that will help you to feel your best regardless of what others think.

 

[pdx1138]

If you've ever scored hottie(s) before, remind yourself of what you're capable of.

And Rejection should be EMBRACED....the more you get rejected, the less you will care after it happens a number of times. This is good for personal growth.

 

[vatoloco]

"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."

If you're getting consistently rejected, there are things about YOU that you need to change. Be honest. With us and with yourself.

It's the only way you'll improve...

 

[konmai]

yea, the weird thing is i've scored girls who have been far better looking than the ones who are currently rejecting me. that was only 2 years ago. since then, girls don't even wanna be my friend. maybe b/c i'm older or either my personality has changed.

before i used to be really shy and quiet -- skinny fat but young. now i'm quiet but more confident and athletic but older. not sure if it's because of my getting older or personality. i want to figure out what worked before and what's not working now.

also, what i find baffling is other dudes can be quiet, and no one really says anything about it. but when i'm quiet, all eyes on me. people make a big deal out of it. not sure what that's about. oh and i try to stay under the radar at school. just wanna go to school, focus in class and then head out to work, study, etc.... i don't really socialize at school at all, but it's been hard since people make a big deal out of it. i don't know if it's b/c people think i'm a loner or what.

went on a date with one girl, and she texted me later asking "were you just being nice to me?" i reassured her that i wasn't and never heard from her again. felt like she was BSing me with that text.

 

[yyc12]

also, what i find baffling is other dudes can be quiet, and no one really says anything about it. but when i'm quiet, all eyes on me. people make a big deal out of it. not sure what that's about.

Funny you say that as I experience the exact same thing. I've come to believe that it all comes down to their perception of you. Once someone has made up their mind about you, there's little you can do to change it. It becomes their reality whether it's actually true or not. When you're smaller/thinner and quiet, you're insecure and shy, but if you're bigger/taller you're the strong silent confident type. People will always make up their own "truths".

 

[BMX]

A rejection is no skin off my d!ck. I say in my head "thanks for playing. On to the next hoe."

 

[ricodragos]

My 2 cents:

If u keep getting rejected, change something... i have a friend who does the same **** with girls over and over again, and gets dumped 2months later.... he dosnt learn.

I had some problems to, i went from "hey.. hihihihih, soooo what are u doing here, lovely weather" to simply "hey you, yeah you ... wait a min i want to talk to you".

Just find something that suits you best. For me is make eye contact until she breaks it, ignore her a bit, go in for the number, leave the premise.

My recommendation:
You shouldnt linger, dont give her the oportunity to start thinking(everything goes bad when a woman gets logical).

Keep an enthusiasmatic voice and bodylanguage.

Introduce yourself, hold the hand shake, tell her you have to go but want to get to know her sometime, ask for number, release hand shake, smile and wave as u gtfo.

 

[XMinister]

The expectation of getting rejected may play a role in your approach. Keep that in mind. It's not as simple as ignoring it the feeling of a crushed ego, because it isn't a light switch you can flip on or off. You will, however, find it becoming easier and easier to let it go. The best advice I can give is to try new strategies. As long as the underlying principle is there (confident and direct), you can play around with technique as you like. Short, simple and straight to the point with a little suave.

 

[vatoloco]

Edit: Oops, wrong thread. My bad.