"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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I have a big f*cking head....and I love it!

dbot

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Okay, so my head isn't that big, but it's one of the few things about my appearance that's ever made me feel insecure. Part of becoming socially successful, with women and in general, was becoming completely comfortable with myself and appreciative of who I am.

It's not rejection that humans fear, but the damaging of our egos. We all secretly know the one blow that will absolutely destroy our self-esteem, and no matter how slim the chances are of ever receiving it, the mere thought of such a drastic event is what inevitably leads to our hesitation.

Time to get real.

I am not perfect, and neither are you. You are either short or fat or bald or skinny or stupid or any combination of the five. Either your nose is big, your teeth are fucked, your chin is long, your eyebrows are bushy, your forehead is wrinkly, your ears are tiny, or your voice is annoying. Your personality has its faults as well. You're obnoxious or arrogant or self-centered or bossy or judgemental or pessimistic or naive. You make up stories, you kill jokes, you can't take your own advice, and you think you have all the answers.

Become Fearless

What do you dislike most about yourself? What is the single most damaging thing a stranger can say to you? Figure it out, and say it to yourself. Say it LOUDLY. Embrace your flaws, because they are the only things that make you who you are, and you damn well better love yourself if you're ever going to be happy.

I'm broke...AND I LOVE IT!
I drive a shitty car...AND I LOVE IT!
I wear glasses...AND I LOVE IT!
I'm terribly impatient...AND I LOVE IT!
I have a big fucking head...AND I LOVE IT!

This is the secret to my success. There is absolutely nothing anyone can say to me that can possibly shake my confidence. I'm always on top of my game; always in the zone. I'm unstoppable. I'm me...AND I LOVE IT!


-dbot
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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AGBourne

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This is way too negative.

Saying to yourself what you hate about yourself will not help you get confidence or anything else. What you are saying is in the right place, the execution is not effective.

Your flaws are not who you are.

Your flaws are not flaws. What you percieve are flaws is what makes up your individual personality.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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dbot

Master Don Juan
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I'm not being negative in the least. I'm saying to embrace what makes you unique. Your flaws are who you are. If everyone was "perfect" then everyone would be the same. How boring is that? You are right though. Your flaws are only flaws as long as you perceive them in a negative sense.

That's the point of this post. Stop trying to hide what makes you different. Once you accept yourself you'll be light years ahead of everyone else, because you'll be free to do anything.
 

MisterMcGee

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If someone asks you "what are you doing tonight?" and youre doing nothing, its really cool to say "nothing much just chilling at my place to unwind doing things i enjoy"
ive heard people say "im such a geek, i really prefer playing music and fooling around with my hobbies rather than partying some nights" and it just reeks of self confidence. dont try to be "super-party-social-chickmagnet-perfect dude" is thats not what you are.
 

russell

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i love it that i'm awkward.
i love it that i'm hard to read.
 

jcap

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nerds will always be nerds, what can I say

big head? lol?
focus on something more important, like a career , how to pay rent, how to support yourself indefintely without being a slave to someone and answering "yes sir" all day just to put food on the table.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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