i felt like My Girlfriend was holding me Back

[Georgepithyou]

Latley I've been doing a lot more self improvment, me and my friend have created our website for our digital marketing firm.

I have two youtube channels that I'm managing, Ive also bewn working out at homedaily and reading an entire novel every 10 days. For about a month I've tried to get my Girlfriend to do the same, join me in self improvment.

Instead she keeps encouraging bad habits, binging on netflix with her, eating fast food like KFC and just going out drinking.

I want to achieve great success and for the better part of 2 months now i have been working towards my goals.

I had to end it with her, she has been getting chubby as well.

Has anyone else had an experience like this?

 

[Atom Smasher]

I’m sure most of us have. You did the right thing.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Latley I've been doing a lot more self improvment, me and my friend have created our website for our digital marketing firm.

I have two youtube channels that I'm managing, Ive also bewn working out at homedaily and reading an entire novel every 10 days. For about a month I've tried to get my Girlfriend to do the same, join me in self improvment.

Instead she keeps encouraging bad habits, binging on netflix with her, eating fast food like KFC and just going out drinking.

I want to achieve great success and for the better part of 2 months now i have been working towards my goals.

I had to end it with her, she has been getting chubby as well.

Has anyone else had an experience like this?

Its great that you decided to do this but its unrealistic that you should expect someone to just randomly do this because you did.

To be clear this had nothing to do with your "self improvement" you just are using that as your justification. You were unhappy with her before you started and are unhappy with her after you did it. Let's not be silly here and try and claim you just suddenly became unhappy because she wouldn't join in doing something you did.

 

[Caelum]

Its great that you decided to do this but its unrealistic that you should expect someone to just randomly do this because you did.

To be clear this had nothing to do with your "self improvement" you just are using that as your justification. You were unhappy with her before you started and are unhappy with her after you did it. Let's not be silly here and try and claim you just suddenly became unhappy because she wouldn't join in doing something you did.

Then why would be with her in the first place? I think it's awesome to see a man having standards and not puttning up with this stuff. A woman would dump a guy in a heartbeat for the same reasons. I think he took a rational, calculated decision wich is nice to see for a change.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

Latley I've been doing a lot more self improvment, me and my friend have created our website for our digital marketing firm.

I have two youtube channels that I'm managing, Ive also bewn working out at homedaily and reading an entire novel every 10 days. For about a month I've tried to get my Girlfriend to do the same, join me in self improvment.

Instead she keeps encouraging bad habits, binging on netflix with her, eating fast food like KFC and just going out drinking.

I want to achieve great success and for the better part of 2 months now i have been working towards my goals.

I had to end it with her, she has been getting chubby as well.

Has anyone else had an experience like this?

All you can do is inspire her, but if she feels like a weight then inspiring her may involve leaving her. You can bring a horse to water, but you can't make it drink. Nice to hear of your great progress!

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Yep, I've been there. One ex was very sweet but used subterfuge to get me to talk myself out of things, or failing that just wasn't as supportive as I'd have liked. Another was just plain negative. They were both also the jealous types which drained me. I think most women to a degree will challenge a man as a way of keeping him kept and also pushing his boundaries, but some are more strident than others.

And yeah the bad habits, those can be killers. One ex did the same thing - ordered takeout or ate garbage. I couldn't stand staying at her place because she rarely cooked.

Honestly I think I function better single.

The jealous ones who just can't see you make progress are drainers. They get angry about it like it's some competition. As usual keep personal goals to yourself.

 

[Seductions_Mad_Scientist]

Latley I've been doing a lot more self improvment, me and my friend have created our website for our digital marketing firm.

I have two youtube channels that I'm managing, Ive also bewn working out at homedaily and reading an entire novel every 10 days. For about a month I've tried to get my Girlfriend to do the same, join me in self improvment.

Instead she keeps encouraging bad habits, binging on netflix with her, eating fast food like KFC and just going out drinking.

I want to achieve great success and for the better part of 2 months now i have been working towards my goals.

I had to end it with her, she has been getting chubby as well.

Has anyone else had an experience like this?

I love to hear about situations played textbook perfect or damn near so.

Good on ya. You can lead the horse to water but you cant force it to drink.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Then why would be with her in the first place? I think it's awesome to see a man having standards and not puttning up with this stuff. A woman would dump a guy in a heartbeat for the same reasons. I think he took a rational, calculated decision wich is nice to see for a change.

But that is my whole point. This has nothing to do with the fact he decided to work on things and she didn't. This had to do with he didn't like some things about her and used her not wanting to self improve as justification for dumping her. In reality he wasn't happy with he whether or not he did it at all.

 

[lamath]

I’m sure most of us have. You did the right thing.

All of us indeed before we knew better.

It happend all the time, get into a relationship and boom ppl get lazy and fat.
The exception are the one that keep improving regardless.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

It's not really her job to go on a "personal" growth journey with you. But if she's intentionally monkey wrenching you and distracting you she has to go.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Has anyone else had an experience like this?

So, my ex was actually a lot more productive and motivated than i was in most ways. But being in a relationship in general just makes me become apathetic and lazy. Without that primal drive to attract women and outperform other men, a lot of things fall by the wayside for me. I think also your testosterone is quite a bit lower in a LTR in the long run, as opposed to regularly dating and sleeping with new women. Test levels have a big impact on stuff like confidence, motivation, dominance, muscle growth, energy, etc.

 

[Georgepithyou]

Its great that you decided to do this but its unrealistic that you should expect someone to just randomly do this because you did.

To be clear this had nothing to do with your "self improvement" you just are using that as your justification. You were unhappy with her before you started and are unhappy with her after you did it. Let's not be silly here and try and claim you just suddenly became unhappy because she wouldn't join in doing something you did.

Honestly I was losing attraction to her, she was gaining weight and even posted a "body positive" image on instagram. I was unhappy that she didn't want to do anything to improve and instead was getting more lazy

 

[Georgepithyou]

It's not really her job to go on a "personal" growth journey with you. But if she's intentionally monkey wrenching you and distracting you she has to go.

Your right but i Just felt like I had to move on, I was improving my Life and she was stagnant. I didn't want to stay with her and grow complacent.

Yep, I've been there. One ex was very sweet but used subterfuge to get me to talk myself out of things, or failing that just wasn't as supportive as I'd have liked. Another was just plain negative. They were both also the jealous types which drained me. I think most women to a degree will challenge a man as a way of keeping him kept and also pushing his boundaries, but some are more strident than others.

And yeah the bad habits, those can be killers. One ex did the same thing - ordered takeout or ate garbage. I couldn't stand staying at her place because she rarely cooked.

Honestly I think I function better single.

Yeah I can rrally agree with you there Negative people (energy vampires) are the worst and most draining, call me old fashioned but i also believe A woman should support her man.

 

[Georgepithyou]

Then why would be with her in the first place? I think it's awesome to see a man having standards and not puttning up with this stuff. A woman would dump a guy in a heartbeat for the same reasons. I think he took a rational, calculated decision wich is nice to see for a change.

We met through a friend, we got a long. Back then I didnt care about self improvment. I was honestly lazy myself. It Was 2 months ago that ibstarted turning my life around, and one month aho that i wanted her to join me. For a month I tried to also get her into self improvment.

Instead she got lazier and more overweight, I know this is superficial but I just couldn't stand it.