"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I feel like I have bad luck

Vanilla

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Brief background: I'm 20, in community college with no dorm, living at home in a very quiet neighborhood. (bunch of old geezers living around here)

To be honest I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. I read the bible, been friendly with everyone I meet, got a dozen numbers, either fake or boyfriend issues. I don't find myself boring and I feel I show confidence and style. I look in the mirror and find myself attractive and I work out daily. I even resorted to myspace and craigslist because I was getting no where, and still nothing.

I searched the forums for tips and applied them and never get any good leads.

I DONT give compliments to women
I DO take my time to call back, mostly because I'm actually busy working.
I make them laugh when I'm around them sometimes.
I always feel I'm the prize.

But this is not working out the way I want, am I just in a bad location? Or am I trying too hard? Am I not trying enough?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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\O/

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Do you show them interest? Do you ever make a move? Most of the time women won't make a move, unless you are really good-looking. They fear rejection even more than we do. They simply accept or reject.

Try to give give out some compliments (nothing physichal or related to looks), look for IOI's, Kino-escalate and when you feel she is receptive, go for the kiss. You either get rejected or you don't. You can't win unless you're willing to play the game :D
 

So Many Ways

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Do you socialize on campus? Are you part of any school clubs? Do you have study groups in your classes? Just doing that will expose you to more females.
 

msg

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we all have bad luck dude, that's why we're spending our time in front of the computer reading and posting sh*t

i know what you mean though, i've been trying to get this part of my life sorted out for a while now and often feel like i'm making no progress

the thing is that now i look back at the guy i used to be and i realise why i wasn't successful and why i would never have succeeded if i was still the old me

i look at myself now and although i have come a long way i know that there is still a lot to do before i reach my goal

i think you need to get yourself a longer term perspective and find some guys who are good at this stuff and are willing to help you, when you start to talk to and compare yourself to someone who's really good, you will see that it's possible and you'll see what it is that is missing from your game

there's more to this game than you can ever imagine, there are some guys out there working at it almost every day to try and improve just a little bit at a time... compared to them i can almost guarantee that you haven't even tried a fraction has hard as they have

for some it's easy, for others (like me) it's not and we just have to keep struggling to get better a little at a time
 

Vanilla

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Originally posted by So Many Ways
Do you socialize on campus? Are you part of any school clubs? Do you have study groups in your classes? Just doing that will expose you to more females.
I don't know where to socialize to be honest. Club hours don't fit with my job schedule. I don't know of any study groups, though I've tried forming a few but no one is interested.

Even in class, if I talk to someone, regardless of gender, they tend to ignore me and talk with their other friends even if I'm in the middle of a convorsation.

I'll try to hit the cafeteria tomorrow, but lately it's always been groups there, just like high school.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Vanilla

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Cmon guys, I'm on the verge of contacting a trannie to give me head. :( I'm getting no where.
 

Jariel

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Originally posted by \O/
Do you show them interest? Do you ever make a move? Most of the time women won't make a move, unless you are really good-looking. They fear rejection even more than we do. They simply accept or reject.

Try to give give out some compliments (nothing physichal or related to looks), look for IOI's, Kino-escalate and when you feel she is receptive, go for the kiss. You either get rejected or you don't. You can't win unless you're willing to play the game :D
Good advice! You have to do a lot more than get a number to progress with a girl. You need to build something mental, emotional and physical between you over a period of time.

And don't fear giving compliments! They're VERY effective if done right (read my post "key to her heart..." in tips section). I have a suspicion you may be playing it too cool. Playing cool or indifferent has it's uses, but not when trying to build a connection.

I used to be in the same position. I'd play cool and hold back then suddenly spring the idea of a date upon her and scare her off. Many of these women were physically attracted to me, yet there was no rapport or connection there.

You say you're on some internet dating sites. Use them as an opportunity to practise your flirting and escalation skills.
 
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