"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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I dont sleep

derby1

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Has anyone got advice for me to assist sleep?

Im 38 now and as many will know I am over a year sober, I thought this would cure all my sleep issues and I would go deep sleep all the way through.

This hasnt been the case, my sleep is broke all the way through the night, and as others are getting up 7am, thats when I go into a deep 2 hour sleep. but it takes a nights fidgeting to get there,

1)My room is dark
2)Caffeine is ltd
3) I do an hours walk at 8pm, makes no difference whatsoever to me falling asleep.

I dont go to bed till 2am most nights, Im going to bring the hour I get up to around 8am
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Dust 2 Dust

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Something that has always helped me is having some form of white noise in the room such as a blowing fan.

Temperature is very important too. I have a hardtime sleeping if Im hot. I only keep a sheet on my bed yearround except for winter.
 

Dust 2 Dust

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A softer mattress and luxury pillows are good too. I dont skimp on mattresses or pillows. I recommend getting a pillow top mattress or a mattress topper with a good cushion.
 
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BackInTheGame78

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Has anyone got advice for me to assist sleep?

Im 38 now and as many will know I am over a year sober, I thought this would cure all my sleep issues and I would go deep sleep all the way through.

This hasnt been the case, my sleep is broke all the way through the night, and as others are getting up 7am, thats when I go into a deep 2 hour sleep. but it takes a nights fidgeting to get there,

1)My room is dark
2)Caffeine is ltd
3) I do an hours walk at 8pm, makes no difference whatsoever to me falling asleep.

I dont go to bed till 2am most nights, Im going to bring the hour I get up to around 8am
Start going to bed at 10pm. This will help reset your broken day/night cycle and get back to a more normal Circadian Rhythm.
 

Black Widow Void

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Melatonin works for me. In the past, no matter how early I awoke, I’d still end up sleepless after midnight

After trying Melatonin, I’ve actually yawned, felt sleepy (it takes about 45 min to kick in) and *wanted* to go to sleep.

You will wake up feeling groggy for at least the first hour, but I’ll take it over a lack of a peaceful nights sleep.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Machine10033

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How do you feel during the day? Are you exhausted or functioning fine ?

Some people, very rare can function and thrive on almost no sleep. Kobe Bryant was one of them.

I have had sleep issues my entire life. In 2012 I stayed awake for 2 days... was drooling on myself the 2nd night... a hit the bed at 830pm... slept until 4am. Next night couldn’t sleep,,, so said screw it... just got up and worked out. That night I passed out on my couch and woke up at 6am. This was a long process but I refused to go to bed unless I was literally passing out. After about 3 months of this my mind associated my bed with sleep.... there was no longer any anxiety about nor being able to fall asleep anymore.

Now I can go to bed whenever I want and pass out in ten minutes. It was a form of cognitive behavior therapy vodoo I pulled on myself
 

derby1

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How do you feel during the day? Are you exhausted or functioning fine ?
not to bad, my face looks a lot younger though when Ive slept well.

annoyingly I seem to be falling into the deepest sleep when its time to get up
 

King Lion

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Exercise midday or early evening.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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Has anyone got advice for me to assist sleep?

Im 38 now and as many will know I am over a year sober, I thought this would cure all my sleep issues and I would go deep sleep all the way through.

This hasnt been the case, my sleep is broke all the way through the night, and as others are getting up 7am, thats when I go into a deep 2 hour sleep. but it takes a nights fidgeting to get there,

1)My room is dark
2)Caffeine is ltd
3) I do an hours walk at 8pm, makes no difference whatsoever to me falling asleep.

I dont go to bed till 2am most nights, Im going to bring the hour I get up to around 8am
Derby mate, watch JRE 1109 W/ Matt Walker. Buy the book, why we sleep or find it online. Follow the sleep regime. It's money. You aren't as old as your age but as old as the oldest organ in your body. There's fallback like melatonin or sleeping pills (see a doctor and know it's very addicting). Also know if you did a brain scan, sleeping pills aren't actually asleep. You are sedated like drinking and passing out. It's not the same as deep REM sleep.

Darken your room. Buy a sleep mask. Turn off lights after 8pm. Cut out TV and gaming by 9pm. Dim TV. turn off blue light off phone. Buy a new matress. Buy bedding. Only use your bedroom for SLEEP. Take up meditation and do it before bed. Don't have aNY caffeine after noon. get a new pillow. If it continues, she a specialist. You may have some neuralogical disorder, sleep apnea or something.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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Go do a boxing/martial art class for 2 hours and tell me you can't sleep
 

Bingo-Player

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i will take a look

Update: not available to buy over the counter in the UK
You can order it online from one of them dodgy european pharmacies i got some 3mg tabs for like 12 quid they took a few weeks to come mind but they arrived and they do work just don't take them all the time

Iv'e had chronic issues with sleep over the last 2/3 years it was the beginning of the end for my relationship ...... now i have just about got it back into something that seems normal but i still rarely sleep more than 6/7 hours


White noise / fan i find great

Also i try to journal before bed as much as possible, i find this takes out the racing thoughts from my mind and puts them on paper

We live in a very stimulating era its not surprising so many now have sleep disorders
 

zekko

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Melatonin works for me. In the past, no matter how early I awoke, I’d still end up sleepless after midnight
I also recommend melatonin. It's a natural substance, and it doesn't always work every night, but overall it does improve the quality and (more importantly for me) the regularity of my sleep.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Maybe play this song while you aren't sleeping to commiserate with? Will at least make you want to get up and dance...

 

Georgepithyou

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Magnesium supplements
Make sure you eat carbs before bed instead of a high protein dinner since protein generates more heat due to the fact that your body has to process that.
Take a cold shower to lower body temp
White noise if that helps or silence

And just try to relax
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

metalwater

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massage or chiropractic, for some it can make a huge difference.
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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Having problems with anxiety and sleep has been shown to be caused sometimes by a lack of Biotin, which is usually onset from consuming raw eggs as there is a compound that uses biotin to breakdown.

You could try a biotin supplement, feel free to take as much as you want, it's water soluble which means your body takes what it needs and passes excess, just watch for signs of an allergic reaction and take a lower dose to start maybe.

Biotin deficit also onset hair loss, depression, and when supplemented biotin can boost your metabolism and aid in weight loss.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Has anyone got advice for me to assist sleep?

Im 38 now and as many will know I am over a year sober, I thought this would cure all my sleep issues and I would go deep sleep all the way through.

This hasnt been the case, my sleep is broke all the way through the night, and as others are getting up 7am, thats when I go into a deep 2 hour sleep. but it takes a nights fidgeting to get there,

1)My room is dark
2)Caffeine is ltd
3) I do an hours walk at 8pm, makes no difference whatsoever to me falling asleep.

I dont go to bed till 2am most nights, Im going to bring the hour I get up to around 8am
Do your walk early in the morning. The evening physical activity might be waking you up and causing you to have some adrenaline in the system.
 

derby1

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Do your walk early in the morning. The evening physical activity might be waking you up and causing you to have some adrenaline in the system.
Ive made an updated post, coffee may be activating my stress gland, this explains my broken sleep and muffin tops.

Ill report back fortnightly
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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