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I can't *** from sex at the moment...

Exil

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Hi gents. This is a strange one for me. So I've been seeing a few girls lately and one of them has become my main plate. Started sleeping with her around early December and for some reason, I just can't *** from sex with her.

She's a very attractive girl, easily an 8 but she's got a totally different body type to what I'm used to or what I normally go for. All of my exes have been curvy (slim, big up top) but this girl is tiny. Very athletic body, better abs than me but for some reason I can't *** when we do anything sexual.

It's getting to the point now where I already know it's not going to happen before we even start anything and it's massively throwing me off. Have any of you ever had this happen to you and what can I do to change it?

I've tried only using her nudes to masturbate to and that's not a problem at all, *** every time but the issue only occurs when we have sex or she gives me a bj etc. She hasn't really said anything but she's definitely noticed that it's only her cumming and me just sitting there after looking deflated. What I don't want to happen is she starts thinking it's her fault and it starts to affect her confidence because she's incredible in bed (does pretty much everything, nothing is out of bounds etc).

I don't know if this is something to do with not being fully "over" my ex still? I was with her for 11 years and have two kids with her and had bad oneitis for her. Any advice would be appreciated.
 

Exil

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First one. Been dating two other girls for a while but haven't done anything with them other than kissed both. Don't really have sexual urges at all towards any of them either. To be honest, I'm starting to worry that reading all the rp stuff has made me hate women even on a subconscious level.
 

KindredSpiritzz

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I have the same issue. I can do it by myself but not with a woman anymore. Im thinking it might have something to do with porn and getting too used to doing it myself. Course i had this issue to a lesser degree pretty much all my life, but when i was younger i had the stamina to just keep going til it eventually happened even if it took 45 minutes. I do wonder how much age plays a factor too? How old are you?
My only advice would be stop masturbating and/or looking at porn and see if that helps or if you think its a mental issue maybe jack off and cvm on her boobs or something just to clear that first hurdle of cvmming mentally. And maybe extent foreplay a little bit longer having her work you over longer than usual just trying to get you more wound up. None of that works for me anymore but maybe it will you?
 

Kotaix

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What is going thru your head when you're having sex with her?

I've noticed that the more is going thru my head at the time of sex, the worse my performance. The can be as stupid as the plot of the TV show we were just watching.

The less I'm in my head or thinking about stuff, and the more I'm in the moment, the more I enjoy the sex and the easier it is to cvm.
 

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Lookatu

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This sounds funny but it's true. It could be her pvssy just isn't compatible with your d1ck biologically.

I've had similar situations where it was hard for me to cvm with a hb8+ where I would cvm too fast with a hb6. Told hb6 at one point that God must've molded her pvssy for my d1ck since it felt too good. LOL

Funny but true...
 

mrgoodstuff

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This sounds funny but it's true. It could be her pvssy just isn't compatible with your d1ck biologically.

I've had similar situations where it was hard for me to cvm with a hb8+ where I would cvm too fast with a hb6. Told hb6 at one point that God must've molded her pvssy for my d1ck since it felt too good. LOL

Funny but true...
Nothing better than a perfect pvssy that molds itself to you and responds in an incredible manner to your movement.

On those perfect pvssies which weren't many, they had an attractive outer appearance and the scent was one that made me horny.
 
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Kitty652

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It may be that you are unconsciously complexing, because according to your description, it is very good. Besides, you say she's very good in bed. Maybe you're just afraid of failure. Just take Viagra and that's it, or change your girlfriend.
 

TheNewStyle123

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Hi gents. This is a strange one for me. So I've been seeing a few girls lately and one of them has become my main plate. Started sleeping with her around early December and for some reason, I just can't *** from sex with her.

She's a very attractive girl, easily an 8 but she's got a totally different body type to what I'm used to or what I normally go for. All of my exes have been curvy (slim, big up top) but this girl is tiny. Very athletic body, better abs than me but for some reason I can't *** when we do anything sexual.

It's getting to the point now where I already know it's not going to happen before we even start anything and it's massively throwing me off. Have any of you ever had this happen to you and what can I do to change it?

I've tried only using her nudes to masturbate to and that's not a problem at all, *** every time but the issue only occurs when we have sex or she gives me a bj etc. She hasn't really said anything but she's definitely noticed that it's only her cumming and me just sitting there after looking deflated. What I don't want to happen is she starts thinking it's her fault and it starts to affect her confidence because she's incredible in bed (does pretty much everything, nothing is out of bounds etc).

I don't know if this is something to do with not being fully "over" my ex still? I was with her for 11 years and have two kids with her and had bad oneitis for her. Any advice would be appreciated.
I know how you feel man. I am in the process of getting divorced (with her 7 years, married 3), and I have had sex with 4 women since then. Sex was great with 2, average with one, and not so great with another. But with occasionally (even with the great ones) I will find it hard to bust. This LITERALLY just happened tonight. First go around I busted rather quickly. 2nd time we ****ed for a while and I ended up just stopping because I wasn't c!mming. I think with time you and I will find it easier to feel comfortable and bust every time with these women the further detached we get from our exs. I think it's normal man. Just keep practicing and meeting new women - that's what I'm doing.

Side note: I have also run into the situation a few times where I have not been able to get/stay hard - sometimes even with a women I may have had sex with before! Important thing to remember is your d!ck isn't a machine and sometimes you're just not in the mood, or maybe not really attracted to the chick's personality, body type, etc.
 

TheNewStyle123

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What is going thru your head when you're having sex with her?

I've noticed that the more is going thru my head at the time of sex, the worse my performance. The can be as stupid as the plot of the TV show we were just watching.

The less I'm in my head or thinking about stuff, and the more I'm in the moment, the more I enjoy the sex and the easier it is to cvm.
Been there man. If there is sh!t going on at work/personal life (or even mundane stuff like the plot of a TV show) I will find it hard to focus and "let go" to just have fun and get into it.
 

KindredSpiritzz

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I think with time you and I will find it easier to feel comfortable and bust every time with these women the further detached we get from our exs.
I have usually found the first time im with a woman to be the most exciting for me. New woman, new body is my best chance to cvm. After a few times the novelty and excitement wears off for me and i get kind of bored. Course i dont have the ex factor in there messing things up so that could play a factor in his case. Once you hit 40 things start changing too for some guys. We're not the breeding machines we were in our youth and father time starts collecting his due.
 

B80

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May be some useful tips in similar thread I started recently. had similar issue with attractive girl I was seeing following divorce.

 

Medina

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This sounds funny but it's true. It could be her pvssy just isn't compatible with your d1ck biologically.

I've had similar situations where it was hard for me to cvm with a hb8+ where I would cvm too fast with a hb6. Told hb6 at one point that God must've molded her pvssy for my d1ck since it felt too good. LOL

Funny but true...
It's because you felt truly superior to hb6 and not to the hb8, whom you possibly felt inferior to, subconsciously

OP this is your problem. Sex is about power. It's part of the reason Men date down the hierarchy while women always date up
 

BackInTheGame78

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Find a position that you know works for you. I have the same issues but mine occur from fvcking for too long. I get to a point when I can choose to bust a load or I can keep going. Usually I keep going and then it becomes almost impossible to cvm for me. What I found normally works is getting them in a certain position while fvcking them doggystyle that makes them really tight and then I am able to usually bust a nut.

I would suggest finding a "go to" position or even angle within a position that you always can use to bust.
 

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KindredSpiritzz

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What I found normally works is getting them in a certain position while fvcking them doggystyle that makes them really tight and then I am able to usually bust a nut.
im curious how old you are? That always worked for me right up until about age 45 and then that no longer worked either.
 

LiveYourDream

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In case someone here finds it helpful...

Below is a link to two articles that are quite detailed on Delayed Ejaculation that may bring greater insight and understanding of the topic. The articles discuss multiple potential causes and thus different ways to possibly address DE accordingly.

For men who haven’t experienced DE, the articles might still be educational and/or helpful, as they seem to offer things to be aware of, to help avoid DE.

Why Delayed Ejaculation Is More Common Than Folks Realize
Delayed ejaculation is rapidly becoming more prevalent among men in America.

**Link to Article 1**
(The link to the follow up article is right there in paragraph 2.)
 
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