Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

I can attract women easily but cannot keep them around long term

FlexpertHamilton

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Recently I've realized attracting women and maintaining their interest/respect long term are not complementary, but in fact can work against each other. For instance, the more game you learn, the more it can push them away because they're so jaded from all the "fvckboys" they cannot control, and they hate it when a man has better game than them. Plus, in many ways game can be deceptive, and if your game is more outwardly focused and not internally congruent, after a while they'll see through all your tricks.

I truly believe it is much more valuable to learn how to maintain a womens respect for you than it is to simply attract them. I can speak from experience: women will still be attracted to you and fvck you whenever you want even if they have low respect for you. Attraction isn't really that important, what's important is respect. I would rather have 1 plain looking woman in my life who is loyal, respectful, nurturing, and compliant than a rotation of hot slvts who barely respect me.

Anyway - I've realized that I have had almost no successful relationships and I truly cannot figure out why. I do not feel entitled to anything nor do I expect women to automatically respect and love me. As much as I want to go into "monk mode" and ignore women, I want to capitalize on their increased interest levels lately, so I want to keep trying.

Issue is, I cannot tell if my selection process is poor (eg ignoring red flags) or if there is something I'm consistently doing to turn them away. It's not with every girl mind you, some are very sweet, submissive, and feminine, so it could simply be bad luck and not finding quality women. Either way, I'm quite jaded about it.
 
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thermodynamic

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What is your job, hobbies, etc. Are you doing something with your life?
 

LARaiders85

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Too much of a player vibe, low status, bad sex and hygiene...all factors.
 

Dr.Suave

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Maybe its not you bro, its them. Most modern girls are just not girlfriend material.

Also, you are the prize, they should be chasing you. No need to worry about keeping girls around if they are always chasing you. Even if you LTR one of them, you cannot let her get too comfortable; even if you gave her exclusivity, she should still be chasing you in a sense.
 

EyeBRollin

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Recently I've realized attracting women and maintaining their interest/respect long term are not complementary, but in fact can work against each other. For instance, the more game you learn, the more it can push them away because they're so jaded from all the "fvckboys" they cannot control, and they hate it when a man has better game than them. Plus, in many ways game can be deceptive, and if your game is more outwardly focused and not internally congruent, after a while they'll see through all your tricks.

I truly believe it is much more valuable to learn how to maintain a womens respect for you than it is to simply attract them. I can speak from experience: women will still be attracted to you and fvck you whenever you want even if they have low respect for you. Attraction isn't really that important, what's important is respect. I would rather have 1 plain looking woman in my life who is loyal, respectful, nurturing, and compliant than a rotation of hot slvts who barely respect me.
With respect, you are overestimating your game. Bedding women is entry level. If you can’t retain chicks, your game isn’t that tight to begin with

Game really is a function of identifying a woman’s interest, qualifying her, social calibration, and being a challenge. Most guys struggle with the last two. You are likely missing one of these components.
 

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dogsta

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Recently I've realized attracting women and maintaining their interest/respect long term are not complementary [...]
Firstly, you don't control attraction. But, you do control maintenance.

Thus:

With respect, you are overestimating your game. [...]
Maybe check out the Dr Love's dictionary book that more looks at how to keep women?

Otherwise, pretty much what everyone has said.
 

SmoothSmooth

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out of curiosity how do you attract these women? how do you manage to bed hot women without them respecting you? where do you meet & whats your text game etc
 

Roober

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It's your fault 100%. Anyone who tells you otherwise is fooling themselves...

1. Is your body and mind on point? If not, what do you really have to offer? In modern day, you need to be a top tier man to draw and keep top tier women.

2. Are you filtering well enough? The next key stage is filtering your prospects. I don't go on dates with any women. They have to pass through a series of tests. The first is me filtering swipes on a dating app. The second is the conversation on the app, or the first conversation when I approach them. I have a set of criteria that many women will not meet. The second is my text chain after I've gotten their number/IG. The third is the first date. All of these are filters where I separate the wheat from the chaff.

3. Every encounter with her from that point forward, I am looking to disqualify her. And no, it is not over stupid $hit like she was 10 minutes late. I am looking for character flaws (honesty, giver, respect, etc.)

Most men are so desperate, they don't filter well.

I really dont give a flying f--- if it proceeds or not. I have much better $hit to do than waste time on women.

3. How is your d1ck game? Let me tell you, it's probably $hit...

4. Then comes the real work. Women need maintenance to stick around. You have to treat them well, but you also have to keep a strong grasp on point number one!

If you performed the first three steps very well, she will not only fall head over heels for you, but she will do ANYTHING you ask of her.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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What is your job, hobbies, etc. Are you doing something with your life?
Don't like disclosing personal info, but I am in fact in a good place in my life, for better or worse.

With respect, you are overestimating your game. Bedding women is entry level. If you can’t retain chicks, your game isn’t that tight to begin with

Game really is a function of identifying a woman’s interest, qualifying her, social calibration, and being a challenge. Most guys struggle with the last two. You are likely missing one of these components.
Probably the bolded. So many complain I'm too "closed off/indifferent" but they're probably complaining about the very thing that attracted them to me in the first place, so idk why I listen to what they say.

out of curiosity how do you attract these women? how do you manage to bed hot women without them respecting you? where do you meet & whats your text game etc
I am fairly good looking and I have it ez on dating apps. Many women are more superficial than you'd think. My **** game is good too.

It's your fault 100%. Anyone who tells you otherwise is fooling themselves...

1. Is your body and mind on point? If not, what do you really have to offer? In modern day, you need to be a top tier man to draw and keep top tier women.

2. Are you filtering well enough? The next key stage is filtering your prospects. I don't go on dates with any women. They have to pass through a series of tests. The first is me filtering swipes on a dating app. The second is the conversation on the app, or the first conversation when I approach them. I have a set of criteria that many women will not meet. The second is my text chain after I've gotten their number/IG. The third is the first date. All of these are filters where I separate the wheat from the chaff.

3. Every encounter with her from that point forward, I am looking to disqualify her. And no, it is not over stupid $hit like she was 10 minutes late. I am looking for character flaws (honesty, giver, respect, etc.)

Most men are so desperate, they don't filter well.

I really dont give a flying f--- if it proceeds or not. I have much better $hit to do than waste time on women.

3. How is your d1ck game? Let me tell you, it's probably $hit...

4. Then comes the real work. Women need maintenance to stick around. You have to treat them well, but you also have to keep a strong grasp on point number one!

If you performed the first three steps very well, she will not only fall head over heels for you, but she will do ANYTHING you ask of her.
1. Yes. I am in the best shape of my life physically, and feel as sharp as ever mentally. I never said I was going after top tier woman btw.

2 No, probably not, I rarely test them either. Solid advice here.

3. I know every guy think he's great. I'm not a sex champion, but most of them certainly seem to enjoy themselves.
 

SmoothSmooth

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Don't like disclosuing personal info, but I am in fact in a good place in my life, for better or worse.


Probably the bolded. So many complain I'm too "closed off/indifferent" but they're probably complaining aboout the very thing that attracted them to me in the first place, so idk why I listen to what they say.


I am fairly good looking and I have it ez on dating apps. Many women are more superficial than you'd think. My **** game is good too.



1. Yes. I am in the best shape of my life physically, and feel as sharp as ever mentally. I never said I was going after top tier woman btw.

2 No, probably not, I rarely test them either. Solid advice here.

3. I know every guy think he's great. I'm not a sex champion, but most of them certainly seem to enjoy themselves.

how hot are these women? 8s+? 5-7s?
 

FlexpertHamilton

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how hot are these women? 8s+? 5-7s?
You can message me if you want pics. Almost every girl I've been with in the past year was a 6-8, the most recent was probably a 9 depending who you ask.
 
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