I am going to approach her. Five year love / oneitis. I. NEED. HELP.

[Rocky_Wayne]

Me waiting around for her this one time so I can approach her no matter what, without losing the chance if I leave it to accidental (because college is ending and I rather approach her in college where she is always alone, whereas with girl friends outside) makes me obsessed? Because of course, I rather stare at ceilings during the break I have between classes instead of wait around for and to approach the lady of my dreams right? Try harder kiddo.

No, the fact that you spent 5 years building up the courage to approach her makes you obsessed.

 

[Jaylan]

obvious troll thread is obvious. OP has some lame sock accounts too.

 

[JoeMarron]

OP has some lame sock accounts too.

Lol this. OP your cheerleader LearningAndImproving is cheering for you a bit too hard. Tell him to tone it down lest people think you're trolling even more than they already do.

Anyways this is the biggest case of oneitus I've ever seen. I doubt there's any air up there on the pedestal that this chick is sitting on. This sh!t isn't complicated dude. Stop being a pvssy and ask her out. Apparently your brother didn't sit around fantasizing about his woman for years, he grabbed his balls and made something happen. If she truly was acting the way you've described then she's probably just as obsessed as you are. Gaming her should be a cakewalk so stop over thinking it. Ask her out and start your supposed happily ever after before I have to take you up on your offer and knock some sense into you.

 

[cordoncordon]

This is one of the strangest threads I have ever seen here on SS. For the life of me I cannot figure out if OP is either trolling us to maximum effect or if he has some mental issues going on in that brain of his.

So op, IF you are trolling us? Well done. You write well. Very detailed. You obviously too the time and effort to make this a one of a kind thread. Bravo!

IF this is all real? While I admire your strength of conviction in not forgetting about this girl, at the same time, you have some issues bro. And bear in mind this is not said to attack you or to degrade you in any way. You obviously are a smart guy. A sharp guy. But......

You suffer from OCD. I think that goes without saying. You obsess. Fixate. You remember events and details and spin these things in your mind that most people would not give a second thought to. But to you they are completely important details. This leads to something that affects a part of the brain called the limbic system. It's where feelings come from, essentially. Another part is the prefrontal cortex, which regulates whether those feelings should be turned into actions. If certain people have difficult lives and feel helpless or vulnerable, the prefrontal cortex is weakened, and the limbic system takes over. It flashes memories and feelings and cravings in the person's head because it's one of the few things they look forward to. They live in THAT moment, not thinking of the consequences because they don't have any faith in the future. These people fixate on something nice, something that will always make them feel a certain way. They can't stop thinking about it, and it becomes the one thing that gets them up in the morning or through the day.

They have become obsessed.


In addition I also think you exhibit some autistic and sociopathic tendencies as well.

To top all of this off, you are dealing with one of the few people in the world (the girl) who would not only put up with this behavior, but also encourage it in a way. I think it is safe to say that if it was me, or a lot of people for that matter, if I kept running into the same person over and over and over, and if I was at all interested in talking to them or getting to know them, my reaction WOULD NOT be staring at them from a distance like a crazy person. Or separating from a group I was walking with to get closer to you without talking to you. Or to somehow keep ending up in the same place as you over and over again. And do all of this and NOT SAY A WORD. My reaction would be, after running into you a time or two, to say "hey, how's it going? I keep running into you like this and thought I would say hello". Instead you two have kept playing this 'I know your looking at me, and you know I'm looking at you, but lets pretend we don't really know or see each other and not say a word to each other and see how long this goes on for". I mean, it's borderline psychotic behavior. Normal, rationale, clear thinking people do not act in that manner. So as I said, she probably has just as many issues as you do, which is probably why, if this is all real, this song and dance has gone on for so long without it ever coming to a head or a close. In a sense then, you are soulmates and perfect for each other.

And oh, just an fyi, I do not believe for a second that learning and improving is not you. It is. I know it. You know it. Even Boo the dog knows it. So just stop bro.

So anyway, assuming this is all real (big assumption), yeah, you have issues. So does she. I would suggest you seek help for them. I also suggest that instead of playing this cat and mouse game any longer, you simply message her on facebook for her number or ask her when you see her and ask her out. Speaking of which, I have a very VERY hard time believing that you "forgot" to ask for her number when you finally did speak to her. I know you. You ran over what you were going to say to her 1000 times in your head before you did it. And part of what you were going to say was to get the digits. Yet somehow you forgot?

DO NOT BELIEVE.

Good luck bro, in whatever reality it is you live in.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

EDIT: "That stare was too long and meaningful", not "not meaningful".

This is one of the strangest threads I have ever seen here on SS. For the life of me I cannot figure out if OP is either trolling us to maximum effect or if he has some mental issues going on in that brain of his.

So op, IF you are trolling us? Well done. You write well. Very detailed. You obviously too the time and effort to make this a one of a kind thread. Bravo!

IF this is all real? While I admire your strength of conviction in not forgetting about this girl, at the same time, you have some issues bro. And bear in mind this is not said to attack you or to degrade you in any way. You obviously are a smart guy. A sharp guy. But......

You suffer from OCD. I think that goes without saying. You obsess. Fixate.

They have become obsessed.


In addition I also think you exhibit some autistic and sociopathic tendencies as well.

To top all of this off, you are dealing with one of the few people in the world (the girl) who would not only put up with this behavior, but also encourage it in a way. I think it is safe to say that if it was me, or a lot of people for that matter, if I kept running into the same person over and over and over, and if I was at all interested in talking to them or getting to know them, my reaction WOULD NOT be staring at them from a distance like a crazy person. Or separating from a group I was walking with to get closer to you without talking to you. Or to somehow keep ending up in the same place as you over and over again. And do all of this and NOT SAY A WORD. My reaction would be, after running into you a time or two, to say "hey, how's it going? I keep running into you like this and thought I would say hello". Instead you two have kept playing this 'I know your looking at me, and you know I'm looking at you, but lets pretend we don't really know or see each other and not say a word to each other and see how long this goes on for". I mean, it's borderline psychotic behavior. Normal, rationale, clear thinking people do not act in that manner. So as I said, she probably has just as many issues as you do, which is probably why, if this is all real, this song and dance has gone on for so long without it ever coming to a head or a close. In a sense then, you are soulmates and perfect for each other.

And oh, just an fyi, I do not believe for a second that learning and improving is not you. It is. I know it. You know it. Even Boo the dog knows it. So just stop bro.

So anyway, assuming this is all real (big assumption), yeah, you have issues. So does she. I would suggest you seek help for them. I also suggest that instead of playing this cat and mouse game any longer, you simply message her on facebook for her number or ask her when you see her and ask her out. Speaking of which, I have a very VERY hard time believing that you "forgot" to ask for her number when you finally did speak to her. I know you. You ran over what you were going to say to her 1000 times in your head before you did it. And part of what you were going to say was to get the digits. Yet somehow you forgot?

DO NOT BELIEVE.

Good luck bro, in whatever reality it is you live in.

Lol, do you people have some sort of troll phobia? Why is everyone considered a troll here, when I personally frequent these forums and have never really seen much trolling except from some people like thelonewolf etc. You people pull the troll card more than the folks at gamefaqs used to (back when I still played video games). And that's saying a lot, believe me.

I am not trolling. Thank you for complimenting my writing, I always loved writing (save for high school for some reason). And no, I do not have any mental issues. Because again, without sounding as if I am bragging, my ENTIRE life is in control except with my dream lady. I am excelling academically, financially stable far beyond the average 23 year old, I work out 3 days a week and socialize multiple days/nights a week. None of it has been affected because of her.

Nor have I ever tried to approach her all these years. So whoever that was who said I was building courage all these years, should know I always kept a "if it happens, it happens" mood with her. It was only until the the day I saw her looking at me while she was waiting for her gyro/food (see page 1) that I said "you know what, time to take this easy and approach her. That stare was just too long and meaningful". Midterms came and work flow increased so I delayed this a little. Until this past Tuesday night when I decided I would approach her Wednesday morning and created this topic.

What did I do Wednesday? I took the initiative in the eye contact, the smile, and the first words. I approached. I had her smiling. I made her laugh. I lead her around. I dropped her off to her lab. I made her say my name, and I let her know subconsciously that this was just a first time short meeting, we will be seeing each other a lot more from now.

All in all, this thread didn't even serve half of what I originally hoped it would. A few people helped me, while others called me a troll, and the last third simply said I should just give up (lol? Such weak minded people).

If you or anyone wants, we can break down the entire first meeting (or previous run ins) into details and every damned detail would speak for the positive. NOTHING was planned. This entire approach was not planned. I knew I was going to do it, but I never plan anything ahead of time. Because I have a mindset that believes anything spontaneous or on the spot is the best way to go, whether it be conversations, or photos (meaning, usually the best photos taken are those where the subject isn't told they are about to be snapped). Of course, there are exceptions such as speeches and lectures, but even those are not safe from being done spontaneously. And believe me, I love public speaking. I have been escorted out of places several times for public singing or public interactions (pranks, stunts, dancing, etc).

I do not have OCD. Going by it's literal meaning, I don't give a damn if colors, numbers, shapes or other things are out of order. I don't need to specifically remember something. It sounds like you are following the thread, so I don't know how you skipped over the part I said in two different places. "I remember these small details, because I have good memory. It's not just about her. I can say the same for my family, my guy friends, my girl-friends, etc. If I care about them, my mind SUBCONSCIOUSLY remembers what they wore on a certain day or what we talked about on a certain day. Simply put, if they matter to me, I will remember how they dressed or what we talked about. Whether I want to or not. Period. End of story.

So while I appreciate the bit on the brain's functions, sorry I had to skip past it. I have a bachelor's in biology, we took several psychology classes to get there

Why did she and I stare at each other? I did because I knew her, I liked her but I was still cold on her for denying the fb request in 2010. She stared at me because she knew me, more or less likes me, possibly was affected by the way I handled the fb thing, and is...oh whats that? SHY. Not in the general sense, but in the sense "I denied his request, he went cold. If I approach him now, he might deny me". Fear. But it's only until recently that I realized the fb thing was my fault. I should have never added her without approaching first. But I have matured so much that now, I won't add her on fb no matter what, until we become exclusive maybe (hell, I don't even want my fb anymore). As for Learningandimproving, lol, he's like a bro to me. We do everything together. Except college and work. He's my wingman, my bro, my best friend, whatever you want to call him. Make whatever assumptions you want though, have fun

We do run into each other. Streets. Banks(although the least). Parks. Restaurants. Events. Colleges(yes, multiple). Train stations. We do make great eye contact, at times even stare, SHE however goes a step ahead and goes out of her way to get closer to me, i.e. walking a little further from her friends to be in alignment with me. Etc.

You have to remember one thing. We have DOZENS of mutual friends. For all I know, she knows a lot about me from our mutual girl-friends. We don't know how good the girls describe me to her (Obviously has to be good, because I have healthy friendships with them all).

You told me to message her on fb for her number? Really man? Two grave mistakes in one go? I might as well as end all of it with her while I am it then. Idc if she adds me on fb, pokes me, sends me a message asking for my number, I am not escalating until we meet in person. Even if she asks for my number on fb, I am going to laugh it off and just say meet me at our Baskin Robbins tonight at 10.

Lastly, believe, I never planned the whole approach, let alone getting her number. Planned things never work well except for speeches. And that's exactly what happens if you plan an approach. It becomes a fkin speech. The entire thing was natural she could tell, she was completely natural too. I was able to see her mind racing to come up with things to say. Hence everything she said. Of the three silent moments, she broke two of them. She was the one acting nervous. Then again, I did take her by surprise.

 

[cordoncordon]

Lol, do you people have some sort of troll phobia? Why is everyone considered a troll here, when I personally frequent these forums and have never really seen much trolling except from some people like thelonewolf etc. You people pull the troll card more than the folks at gamefaqs used to (back when I still played video games). And that's saying a lot, believe me.

I am not trolling. Thank you for complimenting my writing, I always loved writing (save for high school for some reason). And no, I do not have any mental issues. Because again, without sounding as if I am bragging, my ENTIRE life is in control except with my dream lady. I am excelling academically, financially stable far beyond the average 23 year old, I work out 3 days a week and socialize multiple days/nights a week. None of it has been affected because of her.

Nor have I ever tried to approach her all these years. So whoever that was who said I was building courage all these years, should know I always kept a "if it happens, it happens" mood with her. It was only until the the day I saw her looking at me while she was waiting for her gyro/food (see page 1) that I said "you know what, time to take this easy and approach her. That stare was just too long and without meaning". Midterms came and work flow increased so I delayed this a little. Until this past Tuesday night when I decided I would approach her Wednesday morning and created this topic.

What did I do Wednesday? I took the initiative in the eye contact, the smile, and the first words. I approached. I had her smiling. I made her laugh. I lead her around. I dropped her off to her lab. I made her say my name, and I let her know subconsciously that this was just a first time short meeting, we will be seeing each other a lot more from now.

All in all, this thread didn't even serve half of what I originally hoped it would. A few people helped me, while others called me a troll, and the last third simply said I should just give up (lol? Such weak minded people).

If you or anyone wants, we can break down the entire first meeting (or previous run ins) into details and every damned detail would speak for the positive. NOTHING was planned. This entire approach was not planned. I knew I was going to do it, but I never plan anything ahead of time. Because I have a mindset that believes anything spontaneous or on the spot is the best way to go, whether it be conversations, or photos (meaning, usually the best photos taken are those where the subject isn't told they are about to be snapped). Of course, there are exceptions such as speeches and lectures, but even those are not safe from being done spontaneously. And believe me, I love public speaking. I have been escorted out of places several times for public singing or public interactions (pranks, stunts, dancing, etc).

I do not have OCD. Going by it's literal meaning, I don't give a damn if colors, numbers, shapes or other things are out of order. I don't need to specifically remember something. It sounds like you are following the thread, so I don't know how you skipped over the part I said in two different places. "I remember these small details, because I have good memory. It's not just about her. I can say the same for my family, my guy friends, my girl-friends, etc. If I care about them, my mind SUBCONSCIOUSLY remembers what they wore on a certain day or what we talked about on a certain day. Simply put, if they matter to me, I will remember how they dressed or what we talked about. Whether I want to or not. Period. End of story.

So while I appreciate the bit on the brain's functions, sorry I had to skip past it. I have a bachelor's in biology, we took several psychology classes to get there

Why did she and I stare at each other? I did because I knew her, I liked her but I was still cold on her for denying the fb request in 2010. She stared at me because she knew me, more or less likes me, possibly was affected by the way I handled the fb thing, and is...oh whats that? SHY. Not in the general sense, but in the sense "I denied his request, he went cold. If I approach him now, he might deny me". Fear. But it's only until recently that I realized the fb thing was my fault. I should have never added her without approaching first. But I have matured so much that now, I won't add her on fb no matter what, until we become exclusive maybe (hell, I don't even want my fb anymore). As for Learningandimproving, lol, he's like a bro to me. We do everything together. Except college and work. He's my wingman, my bro, my best friend, whatever you want to call him. Make whatever assumptions you want though, have fun

We do run into each other. Streets. Banks(although the least). Parks. Restaurants. Events. Colleges(yes, multiple). Train stations. We do make great eye contact, at times even stare, SHE however goes a step ahead and goes out of her way to get closer to me, i.e. walking a little further from her friends to be in alignment with me. Etc.

You have to remember one thing. We have DOZENS of mutual friends. For all I know, she knows a lot about me from our mutual girl-friends. We don't know how good the girls describe me to her (Obviously has to be good, because I have healthy friendships with them all).

You told me to message her on fb for her number? Really man? Two grave mistakes in one go? I might as well as end all of it with her while I am it then. Idc if she adds me on fb, pokes me, sends me a message asking for my number, I am not escalating until we meet in person. Even if she asks for my number on fb, I am going to laugh it off and just say meet me at our Baskin Robbins tonight at 10.

Lastly, believe, I never planned the whole approach, let alone getting her number. Planned things never work well except for speeches. And that's exactly what happens if you plan an approach. It becomes a fkin speech. The entire thing was natural she could tell, she was completely natural too. I was able to see her mind racing to come up with things to say. Hence everything she said. Of the three silent moments, she broke two of them. She was the one acting nervous. Then again, I did take her by surprise.

See but just by the length and exhausting detail in your response to my post tells me a lot about you. I'm not saying you are by any means, but you remind a lot of a serial killer. The kind of serial killer that meticulously plans out his kills. Who will obsess and cultivate over every minute detail. I don't doubt that you are successful in life. People with your kind of mental issues usually are. You are driven and leave nothing to chance because you plan everything, obsess over everything. And in the working/career world that means good things. And I am not even necessarily saying that there is anything THAT wrong with how you behave.....right now. It's just "different". But it can 'potentially lead to some much more serious problems down the road if and when your mind starts spinning out of control, which tends to happen to people with the kinds of issues that you have.

Keep us posted.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

See but just by the length and exhausting detail in your response to my post tells me a lot about you. I'm not saying you are by any means, but you remind a lot of a serial killer. The kind of serial killer that meticulously plans out his kills. Who will obsess and cultivate over every minute detail. I don't doubt that you are successful in life. People with your kind of mental issues usually are. You are driven and leave nothing to chance because you plan everything, obsess over everything. And in the working/career world that means good things. And I am not even necessarily saying that there is anything THAT wrong with how you behave.....right now. It's just "different". But it can 'potentially lead to some much more serious problems down the road if and when your mind starts spinning out of control, which tends to happen to people with the kinds of issues that you have.

Keep us posted.

Nah, I only respond in detail to detailed posts is because, in respect, for a lack of a better. If someone can take the time to write a decently long post for me, I can take the time to respond in a similar manner (unless the post is all hate). Likewise in person, I can debate with people as long as their are good points being made from either party, but if I sense that the conversation is going nowhere, I end it on the spot. Nothing is planned. Don't know how I can stress this enough.

I will keep you posted.

Oh and did I mention I love writing?

 

[Tictac]

I never planned the whole approach, let alone getting her number. Planned things never work well except for speeches.

n under three hours I will standing with her face to face and talking. I am feeling confidant but will admit, also a little anxious.

THE only way I run into her today is if I wait outside her class room. Now this can be good or bad.

I waited around the lounge for 2 hours.

Sure you didn't.

You like writing so much that you can't remember what you wrote.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

Sure you didn't.

You like writing so much that you can't remember what you wrote.

Lmao, you have your head up your ass so far deep trying to redeem yourself that you lost any reading comprehension skills you had.

OF course I fkin planned the approach. I made the DECISION to approach her. I set it down in my head "Today I am going to approach her". But I never planned WHAT I would say, or do. That all was entirely natural, from the second I smiled, to the second I dropped her off to her lab and everything in between.

See, posting to help would be one thing, shows a person has a good heart to help even strangers. But to take time to shoot down events in strangers lives over the internet? That just screams "no life" louder than a fkin pornstar being rammed by a guy three times her size.

Try harder

Or don't, you only make a bigger fool out of yourself with each post.

 

[Mr Wright]

Lmao, you have your head up your ass so far deep trying to redeem yourself that you lost any reading comprehension skills you had.

See, posting to help would be one thing, shows a person has a good heart to help even strangers. But to take time to shoot down events in strangers lives over the internet? That just screams "no life" louder than a fkin pornstar being rammed by a guy three times her size.

Try harder

Or don't, you only make a bigger fool out of yourself with each post.

I think you need to keep quiet and just get on with it, there was nothing wrong with what was said and you're analysing people's reading comprehension when you can't even look at your own behaviour. You've been lusting after some girl for 5 years, you know it's not healthy so shut up and listen.

You look like an idiot. You're clearly living in some sunshine bubble where you can't take criticism. If you come somewhere like this for advice, you're going to get both perspectives, it's called having an open mind. If you don't like the advice, ignore it. You're cherry picking the advice you take, just because something has a negative overtone, it doesn't mean it's wrong. Granted it's package in the wrong way but you need your eyes opened, you need to realise that this behaviour is not normal.

I'll ask you one question, how will you feel if this chick doesn't want anything to do with you romantically?

 

[Father Joseph]

The next time you see her ask her out. The longer you wait the worse your obsession gets.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

The next time you see her ask her out. The longer you wait the worse your obsession gets.

Of course. Whether I meet her at our Baskin Robbins, college, or the moon, I am getting her number and letting her know we're going to do something soon. I'm most likely going to take her out to a skiing resort, theme park or ice skating.

I think you need to keep quiet and just get on with it, there was nothing wrong with what was said and you're analysing people's reading comprehension when you can't even look at your own behaviour. You've been lusting after some girl for 5 years, you know it's not healthy so shut up and listen.

You look like an idiot. You're clearly living in some sunshine bubble where you can't take criticism. If you come somewhere like this for advice, you're going to get both perspectives, it's called having an open mind. If you don't like the advice, ignore it. You're cherry picking the advice you take, just because something has a negative overtone, it doesn't mean it's wrong. Granted it's package in the wrong way but you need your eyes opened, you need to realise that this behaviour is not normal.

I'll ask you one question, how will you feel if this chick doesn't want anything to do with you romantically?

Or more simply, you need to stop focusing so negatively on the life of someone you don't even know and focus on yours. The fact I said that this woman never affected my life negatively at all, EVER, a number of times yet you now think I "lusted" after her, alone shows how badly you're hopping on a dildo in front of a computer just trying to make negative assumptions after assumptions. You're telling what is healthy or not to a guy who is in the best shape of his life, and is excelling in every category at the moment? At this point I don't know whether I should laugh at you or feel so fkin sad for your life that I just walk out of my workplace and go get something to drink my sorrows out knowing there are people like you in the world.

But hey, if I am getting paid to respond to idiotic posts on a forum, while discussing my potential lady, why not?

You are saying I look like an idiot; I'll take that over any day in comparison to you buddy, who showed himself as an idiot the moment he posted. I didn't come here for criticism, I came here for motivation. And I got it. By many people in this thread, and countless private messages. Did we forget the icing on the cake where I approached her within 12ish hours of this thread, and everything went , oh so "sunshine bubblish" fking fantastic? Nah, we didn't forget

I had made the decision to approach her, and I posted here to get that little motivation pump up the night before I approach. I never took any advice, since the good advice was telling me what I already had decided to do anyways ("APPROACH HER!") and the bull**** "advice" (lol?) like yours was never taken seriously anyways.

If she by chance doesn't respond back the way I want, what will I do? I will walk away fking LAUGHING. It will have been brought to a "CLOSURE". You keep trying to ignore the fact that my life is going so fking perfectly good, that at the moment, there is literally nothing that can give a reason to complain. I stopped playing with other girls for this one. Harms? NONE. Benefits? TONS. I got more time. I feel even more superior and focused. And I have one woman to focus on now. Especially now that the contact barrier has been shattered rather beautifully.

Every closure to me is a good thing, whether the closure itself works in my favor or not. Because it tells me one of two things "You got it! Now keep progressing!" or "It didn't work. Time to move onto something new!" Win win. All the fking time.

Fk whining or crying or running after something that doesn't want to be caught. You either do or don't. End of story.

Now let me ask you a question. If you KNOW none of your stupid **** is going to affect how I think or how I make my choices, why do you keep wasting your precious time posting here? Last I recall, I clearly said I wanted motivation to go forward with her, and nothing else. She will take care of that if it needs to happen. There's your answer.

Think your next response out carefully, if you still have something useless to type up.

 

[Mr Wright]

Of course. Whether I meet her at our Baskin Robbins, college, or the moon, I am getting her number and letting her know we're going to do something soon. I'm most likely going to take her out to a skiing resort, theme park or ice skating.



Or more simply, you need to stop focusing so negatively on the life of someone you don't even know and focus on yours. The fact I said that this woman never affected my life negatively at all, EVER, a number of times yet you now think I "lusted" after her, alone shows how badly you're hopping on a dildo in front of a computer just trying to make negative assumptions after assumptions. You're telling what is healthy or not to a guy who is in the best shape of his life, and is excelling in every category at the moment? At this point I don't know whether I should laugh at you or feel so fkin sad for your life that I just walk out of my workplace and go get something to drink my sorrows out knowing there are people like you in the world.

But hey, if I am getting paid to respond to idiotic posts on a forum, while discussing my potential lady, why not?

You are saying I look like an idiot; I'll take that over any day in comparison to you buddy, who showed himself as an idiot the moment he posted. I didn't come here for criticism, I came here for motivation. And I got it. By many people in this thread, and countless private messages. Did we forget the icing on the cake where I approached her within 12ish hours of this thread, and everything went , oh so "sunshine bubblish" fking fantastic? Nah, we didn't forget

I had made the decision to approach her, and I posted here to get that little motivation pump up the night before I approach. I never took any advice, since the good advice was telling me what I already had decided to do anyways ("APPROACH HER!") and the bull**** "advice" (lol?) like yours was never taken seriously anyways.

If she by chance doesn't respond back the way I want, what will I do? I will walk away fking LAUGHING. It will have been brought to a "CLOSURE". You keep trying to ignore the fact that my life is going so fking perfectly good, that at the moment, there is literally nothing that can give a reason to complain. I stopped playing with other girls for this one. Harms? NONE. Benefits? TONS. I got more time. I feel even more superior and focused. And I have one woman to focus on now. Especially now that the contact barrier has been shattered rather beautifully.

Every closure to me is a good thing, whether the closure itself works in my favor or not. Because it tells me one of two things "You got it! Now keep progressing!" or "It didn't work. Time to move onto something new!" Win win. All the fking time.

Fk whining or crying or running after something that doesn't want to be caught. You either do or don't. End of story.

Now let me ask you a question. If you KNOW none of your stupid **** is going to affect how I think or how I make my choices, why do you keep wasting your precious time posting here? Last I recall, I clearly said I wanted motivation to go forward with her, and nothing else. She will take care of that if it needs to happen. There's your answer.

Think your next response out carefully, if you still have something useless to type up.

Credit where credits due, this is actually a pretty sane post. You did take action but I just don't think you should be surprised by the reactions your getting after your original post. Go and get your closure then make sure you never let this kind of thing ever happen again because it's a complete mess.

If after 5 years you can walk away genuinely walk away laughing, I tip my hat to you, I could do it. If your life is really that great, fair enough. I'm having a pretty good time over here, which is why I don't buy into your story but as I said before, I can't help self deception. The fact that you refuse to even acknowledge my point of view just highlights what kind of mentality you have. Criticism = batten down the hatches. There are deeper issues here than this girl. I think the reason why it's taken you 5 years is the fear of having your ego crushed, which is the same reason why you didn't ask for her number. Whilst there is still hope you can cling onto the dream.

Why do I keep wasting my time? Because I get a sick kick out of watching you fight your corner so furiously like a beaten man trying to save the last few remnants of his pride. Just look at the title of your post, doesn't look like a guy in control of his life to me but hey I'm only working off what you give me.

Good luck

 

[Flakey_Woman_Suck]

I am wondering how this will end. Hopefully OP will get the chick (if he's not a troll). Go make it happen OP! (again: at least if you're not a troll).

 

[LoveAfter2009]

I am wondering how this will end. Hopefully OP will get the chick (if he's not a troll). Go make it happen OP! (again: at least if you're not a troll).

Thanks for the well wishing

I don't want to argue with anyone here, but if they keep making up things which might make people not take seriously when they otherwise would have taken it seriously, then I have to counter such negative claims.

I understand where some of them are trying to come from, but they dont understand the fact me and her have a clean slate, and our first conversation went rather beautifully for the time it took (less than 10 minutes). So far, its all postive win to me and anyone with a clear head.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

Credit where credits due, this is actually a pretty sane post. You did take action but I just don't think you should be surprised by the reactions your getting after your original post. Go and get your closure then make sure you never let this kind of thing ever happen again because it's a complete mess.

If after 5 years you can walk away genuinely walk away laughing, I tip my hat to you, I could do it. If your life is really that great, fair enough. I'm having a pretty good time over here, which is why I don't buy into your story but as I said before, I can't help self deception. The fact that you refuse to even acknowledge my point of view just highlights what kind of mentality you have. Criticism = batten down the hatches. There are deeper issues here than this girl. I think the reason why it's taken you 5 years is the fear of having your ego crushed, which is the same reason why you didn't ask for her number. Whilst there is still hope you can cling onto the dream.

Why do I keep wasting my time? Because I get a sick kick out of watching you fight your corner so furiously like a beaten man trying to save the last few remnants of his pride. Just look at the title of your post, doesn't look like a guy in control of his life to me but hey I'm only working off what you give me.

Good luck

If you judged me by my original posts, that only makes you look worse my friend. The original posts were nothing facts and introductions. How can you hate me for saying I love how my life is? Or judge me for the countless times running into her? I was not responsible for those, they were all by fate.

At this point, I don't even know what your trying to even argue for. Is it because I never talked to her before all these years? I already that. Because she had ignored my fb request and messages in 2010, when we had just started running into each other. I had called her out via a final msg and had said "Talk to me when you drop the attitude" and went cold. I had decided that if she wants to talk, she will, if not then oh well. I continued my life and focusing on everything else.

Over the years, we keep seeing each other but never talking. Now, during this I realized some things, and I also learned some things. What did I learn? That she had something going on with a guy during our facebook incident. I also learned that ever since that time, she has not dated ever again. And over the course of the years, what did I realize? That she isn't ignoring me, she is AFRAID of approaching me. Because I left the ball in her court with such a cold message ("Talk to me when you drop the attitude") she KNEW if she approached me, 1) She would indirectly admit she had an attitude and 2) she feared I might reject her.

Why do I say that? Because if she never wanted me to approach her, she would have never given such powerful eye contacts over such a long time. And the fact that she happily talked with me when I approached her Wednesday, only makes that crystal clear. She didn't try to end the conversation, she didn't try to walk away, she didn't give me a "Do I know you? Get away".

I had no fear of my ego being crushed. I simply made a statement 4 years ago to her, and I stood firm to it. It was only later that I learned to pieces of the puzzle that made me rethink, and that I should approach her. That adding her on fb without talking was a fault on my end, and she didn't have an attitude, she was simply seeing someone. And the second piece, her being single all these years and staring me as if I am the universe, yet never approaching, was because she was afraid. All that was needed to prove this was me approaching her. Had she rejected the approach, I would have been wrong in thinking I was wrong about her. But because she accepted my approach and responded back in better ways, proves that I was right about thinking she wanted us to approach each other but couldn't do it herself.

There is no ego involved her. It was simply a matter of "if she wants to, she'll do it" which turned into "oh fk, she does want to but is afraid" which I fixed by "who cares, I'll approach her, if she doesn't respond, I'll have a closure, and if she does, we'll have endless open opportunities ahead". What happened, the former or the latter? I'll give you a hint, it wasn't the former.

Last few remnants? I don't even get where you come from using the word "remnants", let alone "last few?" Lmao. Here's a shocker since you clearly didn't see it the 3 million times I said it before: "She. Has. Never. Affected. My. Life. negatively. My already perfect (in my image) life is going perfect without her". Where did I lose pride again?

As for the title, it simply says I am going to approach a girl I have fancied for 5 years (over the course of 5 years; wording makes a difference). And that I need help (i.e. motivation, because I am going to approach her). What exactly does this have to do with my academics excellence, financial success or social life balance?

If everything is going fkin perfect, why the fk should I lie and say it isn't? You tried to base my life on the account of one woman who hasn't even negatively affected a second of it. Last I recall, she went out of her way to do things to get my attention, so it's pretty safe to assume I was affecting her life to a certain degree.

I feel like I am trying to prove 1+1 equals 2 to someone who keeps saying 3.

 

[Mr Wright]

If you judged me by my original posts, that only makes you look worse my friend. The original posts were nothing facts and introductions. How can you hate me for saying I love how my life is? Or judge me for the countless times running into her? I was not responsible for those, they were all by fate.

At this point, I don't even know what your trying to even argue for. Is it because I never talked to her before all these years? I already that. Because she had ignored my fb request and messages in 2010, when we had just started running into each other. I had called her out via a final msg and had said "Talk to me when you drop the attitude" and went cold. I had decided that if she wants to talk, she will, if not then oh well. I continued my life and focusing on everything else.

Over the years, we keep seeing each other but never talking. Now, during this I realized some things, and I also learned some things. What did I learn? That she had something going on with a guy during our facebook incident. I also learned that ever since that time, she has not dated ever again. And over the course of the years, what did I realize? That she isn't ignoring me, she is AFRAID of approaching me. Because I left the ball in her court with such a cold message ("Talk to me when you drop the attitude") she KNEW if she approached me, 1) She would indirectly admit she had an attitude and 2) she feared I might reject her.

Why do I say that? Because if she never wanted me to approach her, she would have never given such powerful eye contacts over such a long time. And the fact that she happily talked with me when I approached her Wednesday, only makes that crystal clear. She didn't try to end the conversation, she didn't try to walk away, she didn't give me a "Do I know you? Get away".

I had no fear of my ego being crushed. I simply made a statement 4 years ago to her, and I stood firm to it. It was only later that I learned to pieces of the puzzle that made me rethink, and that I should approach her. That adding her on fb without talking was a fault on my end, and she didn't have an attitude, she was simply seeing someone. And the second piece, her being single all these years and staring me as if I am the universe, yet never approaching, was because she was afraid. All that was needed to prove this was me approaching her. Had she rejected the approach, I would have been wrong in thinking I was wrong about her. But because she accepted my approach and responded back in better ways, proves that I was right about thinking she wanted us to approach each other but couldn't do it herself.

There is no ego involved her. It was simply a matter of "if she wants to, she'll do it" which turned into "oh fk, she does want to but is afraid" which I fixed by "who cares, I'll approach her, if she doesn't respond, I'll have a closure, and if she does, we'll have endless open opportunities ahead". What happened, the former or the latter? I'll give you a hint, it wasn't the former.

Last few remnants? I don't even get where you come from using the word "remnants", let alone "last few?" Lmao. Here's a shocker since you clearly didn't see it the 3 million times I said it before: "She. Has. Never. Affected. My. Life. negatively. My already perfect (in my image) life is going perfect without her". Where did I lose pride again?

As for the title, it simply says I am going to approach a girl I have fancied for 5 years (over the course of 5 years; wording makes a difference). And that I need help (i.e. motivation, because I am going to approach her). What exactly does this have to do with my academics excellence, financial success or social life balance?

If everything is going fkin perfect, why the fk should I lie and say it isn't? You tried to base my life on the account of one woman who hasn't even negatively affected a second of it. Last I recall, she went out of her way to do things to get my attention, so it's pretty safe to assume I was affecting her life to a certain degree.

I feel like I am trying to prove 1+1 equals 2 to someone who keeps saying 3.

I just reread your original post and you sound like you deserve each other. Just keep talking to her when you're out, I don't think there was actually any need to neg her. If she looks at you as much as you said she does, you shouldn't feel the need to put her down. Anyway who I am to attempt to crush your dreams, take her on all the dates you've been dreaming about and hope that she actually feels the same way. Just take it slow though, no need to rush if she's how you portray her to be.

The reason why I'm skeptical is because this essentially reads like a screenplay and life is rarely like that. This situation seems too perfect, there's always some shït somewhere and I'm trying to dig it up.

 

[LoveAfter2009]

I just reread your original post and you sound like you deserve each other. Just keep talking to her when you're out, I don't think there was actually any need to neg her. If she looks at you as much as you said she does, you shouldn't feel the need to put her down. Anyway who I am to attempt to crush your dreams, take her on all the dates you've been dreaming about and hope that she actually feels the same way. Just take it slow though, no need to rush if she's how you portray her to be.

The reason why I'm skeptical is because this essentially reads like a screenplay and life is rarely like that. This situation seems too perfect, there's always some shït somewhere and I'm trying to dig it up.

Now this post made smile And not only because you said we deserve each other (or as others say are made for each other) and that all this seems to perfect, but because you aren't the first one too say that. I have many times tried to find a flaw in this myself but am always left scratching my head. I find myself overwhelmed at times thinking this all over. Because it's all...like you said, too perfect.

My friend's who know this story say the same thing, and this girl who is our mutual friend said the same. Our mutual friend also went to the same Junior High School as the two of us (the whole JHS crew is still connected to this day).

That girl (the mutual friend), always asked my dream lady about me and she would say nothing. Then that mutual friend started asking me about my dream lady and I would also stay silent or say nothing. She started suspecting that me and my dream lady are in a secret relationship. When I was confronted, I told her the truth. And she couldn't believe it and has ever since said that we are made for each other and everything that happens between us is way too perfect.

Remember, we graduated with a rumor going around that "me and wifey" loved each other. When neither of us started this, nor was there ever anything romantic between us in Junior High School.

What I think happened is this:

-We started seeing each other again in 2009
-I added her in 2010. She was unsure about me and was apparently also seeing a guy at the time. Things weren't going good. I heard she was always crying. She denied my request.
-I send her the "talk to me once you drop your attitude" and go cold.
-Knowing her, she was hit on all the time. So when I sent that message and literally went cold, her hamster must have started spinning. "Is he really gone? Why isn't he chasing me like other guys?" And we all know woman want what they can't have.
-2011 she breaks up with that chump. Starts stalking me on facebook.
-We continue seeing each other but she never talks to me out of fear of indirectly admitting she had an attitude, or that I would reject her
-She starts losing self confidence, and starts cutting off guy friends.

-She never dates again since 2011.
-For 4 years, we run into each other and make powerful eye contacts.
-2013 she starts doing things to show me she wants me to approach her (i.e. walking in my path, following me into the ice cream parlor, stores, etc).

-2014, massive IOIs at our college.
-May 14th, I approach her. She instantly responds with smiles, face beaming, eyes glistening and doesn't wait to tell me that she always sees me around. We talk and walk around, many different topics are touched upon but only briefly due to time constraints. The entire experience is positive.

If I am not wrong, she basically waited for me all these years. Sad statuses, sad songs, cutting off guys, being depressed, giving me unbroken eye contact, staring at me, going out of her way to get my attention, her friends negging her for "liking someone but not talking to them" (it was a joke her sister and girl bff pulled on her a lot last year through photos, fb etc).

Now, if I correct in all this, awesome. I just have to take things slowly and I'll have her in my arms before this forum sees summer time.

If not, then lol, time to move onto a new chapter into life! There's always something new, exciting and challenging we can find and do. Maybe get out of the states for the summer to go try base jumping finally.

Buddy, trust me, you won't find anything negative in this "love story". I tried already. I get overwhelmed myself every single time. And I didn't leave out anything either, except more details. Which I'm sure no one wants more of.

Anyways, what did do you mean by the neg part? The "sick comment" or future negging?

 

[compleks]

Perfect.?

Sorry dude, this scenario is far from perfect.
I genuinely hope this works out for the best, but you seem to be placing a lot of pressure on the whole situation.

Maybe you're just over-analytical by nature, which might be why everyone thinks you're in too deep.

Do keep us posted though, you have my attention at least.

 

[cataxdz]

I followed this thread so far, and I'm gonna check it again after a few years, when maybe you finally had the guts to ask that chick out and tell her how you feel or whatever.
Good luck.