Yoko Kurama
Don Juan
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What is the first thing I should do to fix this?
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I am afraid of rejection
- Thread starter Yoko Kurama
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Naughty Ninja
Banned
You're not really afraid of rejection. Rejection is quick and though may be a temporary sting to the ego, it's over quick and you hopefully move on and learn from it. You need to keep going on till rejections don't bother you anymore. Each rejection is a step in the direction to a YES. But you need to really sit down and face what we all are really afraid of. ACCEPTANCE. Because then you get to see the person you've built up as a fantasy "perfect" person in your mind for who they reall are and have to think about future meetings with them, how to act, meeting their friends, them meeting yours, parents down the line, things to say, commonalities, differences, and the fact things may not work out. So rejection is easy...Acceptance is a whole other story. Just keep working on yourself and be honest with your shortcomings and work on them. Good luck!
moneyisking
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2009
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love yourself
I'm in the Mood
Master Don Juan
In order to help you the best we can, we'll need a little more information than that.Yoko Kurama said:
Describe a specific situation where you felt this fear of rejection, and how you acted because of it. What kind of a person are you when you're not afraid of rejection?
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
The older i get the more i begin to accept that people
are not put on this earth to serve you. I would expect someone
to be nice and cordial but not to fall in love with me or become my
best friend just because I put myself out there for the offer.
I think the better mindset would be to expect rejection in some form,
be nice and not an a-hole, and if a deeper relationship develops with
a girl or just a friend then you can be happy about that.
I think with this attitude the fear gets reduced and in some perverse way you'll develop
more relationships.
Its all about expectations really, your visions are probably too grand when you think about a girl.
Temper your expectations dramatically and things will flow smoother. Not saying don't be into her or whatever but
just don't EXPECT to see fireworks every time and you'll be more natural. I think back to the last girl i hooked up with.
I really did want her and was doing a nice job of being interesting and funny and what not but when we actually
'did it' I was completely not expecting it. Had I gone out that night hoping or expecting to bang her I gaurantee
it wouldn't have happened because my behavior would have been different. I was pleasantly surprised.
are not put on this earth to serve you. I would expect someone
to be nice and cordial but not to fall in love with me or become my
best friend just because I put myself out there for the offer.
I think the better mindset would be to expect rejection in some form,
be nice and not an a-hole, and if a deeper relationship develops with
a girl or just a friend then you can be happy about that.
I think with this attitude the fear gets reduced and in some perverse way you'll develop
more relationships.
Its all about expectations really, your visions are probably too grand when you think about a girl.
Temper your expectations dramatically and things will flow smoother. Not saying don't be into her or whatever but
just don't EXPECT to see fireworks every time and you'll be more natural. I think back to the last girl i hooked up with.
I really did want her and was doing a nice job of being interesting and funny and what not but when we actually
'did it' I was completely not expecting it. Had I gone out that night hoping or expecting to bang her I gaurantee
it wouldn't have happened because my behavior would have been different. I was pleasantly surprised.
Yoko Kurama
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2008
- Messages
- 51
- Reaction score
- 0
I'll you give more info tonight, I'm on my way to Fort Leonardwood
Yoko Kurama
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2008
- Messages
- 51
- Reaction score
- 0
Best. Advice. Ever.lakeshore said:
“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”
You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.
I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.
Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.
These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
Somewhere in the world there are men who are locked up. They are saying to themselves "When I get out I'm gonna do this, gonna do that, gonna talk to her, etc. Somewhere in the world someone is laying up sick in a hospital thinking or saying, "if only I was healthy I'd do this/that". Somewhere in the world an old man is saying "IF I HAD ONLY TAKEN SOME CHANCES IN MY LIFE"
Don't be those guys, be the one that gets rejected.
Don't be those guys, be the one that gets rejected.