I act the way I acted when I first meet someone. Help! (explanation inside)

[iCatch]

when i first meet someone and act alpha i'm like that all the time with that person. when i first meet someone and act beta i have a hard time acting alpha around that person afterwards

example:

when college firat started i was alpha as heck in one class and had no problem being that way the rest of the semester

in another class i was in a bad mood the first day and was really quiet and it's really hard to speak up after that and be alpha

any advice?

 

[Tiguere]

Dj bible. No one here can give you advice. What works for them most likely won't work for u. So read it.

 

[Neon Owl]

It's because when you first meet someone you create an image of yourself in those people's minds of the sort of person you are. Once you've done that you will feel the need to conform to their ideas of who you are and how you act every time you are around them. Breaking this cycle makes you feel uneasy and vulnerable at first but it can be done if you want to make it happen enough.
If you make the change and STICK with it, people will have no choice but to adapt to the new you and change how they view you.

It's as simple as that.

 

[Iceberg]

That's the weird thing about this board. Or at least the younger folk on it (not that I'm old). There's all this talk about "alpha" and "beta". Just be you. You don't need to dominate a classroom or a frat to get women or to be confident.

The social order of things tends to work itself out. I don't know how anyone can live a normal life while constantly jockeying for hierarchy in different groups.

If you're quiet on your first day of class, and you missed your chance to be "alpha" then come in on the second (or 3rd, 4th, or 5th) day of class and make friends with the people surrounding you. Just be friendly and welcoming and social, and people will gravitate towards you. After that, I guess all your "beta" followers will form...if that's what you're into.

 

[iCatch]

bump