"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How would you react in this situation? (friend rivalry for a girl's attention)

S

Shivastorm_88

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 10, 2007
Messages
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I will sum it up very briefly: I was at a friend's house (HB friend) with a bunch of people, as well as MALE friend and HB7. MALE friend was obviously hitting on HB7 (clear as the sky) and I was unleashing C&F attitude on her (not because I was hitting on her, just because it's my regular mindset). She was enjoying it, laughing a bunch and all that, but he was finding it disrespectful and taking her defense, acting white knight-ish. I obviously didn't do anything about it, but at some point he took one of my sandals and threw it in the pool to, I guess, prove a point that I was not treating her properly. I know this is a very trivial event, but I want to know if my reaction was good, or over-reacted.

I simply (and calmly) told him to go get it from the pool, and made him understand (in front of all our friends, humiliating for him) that his behavior was uncalled for and that he didn't need to act like a prick to try to impress HB7. He then called me on my attitude towards her, to which I replied that it was not his job to defend her and if she saw a problem, she would tell me herself, and that again, acting like a prick because of this situation was unwarranted for. In the end, he retrieved it for me, and this was put behind us.

The reason I ask this is I've always have a tendency to let others walk over me, including my friends. I'm changing that, but I need to calibrate at a proper level. I need to find the right level at which I should let things slide VS at the level at which I should take a stand and show that X behavior is unacceptable.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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H

Htienvu

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2011
Messages
319
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6
If he was a true friend I would leave him to it with the girl. Whenever my friend is interested in a girl I'd not go near her.

No point losing a friend over a chick, if this was a good friend!
 
J

JustLurk

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 1, 2010
Messages
301
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2
Your friend was being ridiculous, but you could have said "hey, let's talk in private" and said the same thing. The result would have been the same and you wouldn't have embarrassed your friend as much.
 
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