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How to tell a girl you want her to be your girlfriend

Don_West

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How do I tell a girl that I like her and I want her to be my girlfriend
 

CoandaEffect

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It is not your job to do that, it is hers. Your job is to take her on fun dates and escalate. The escalation is important or she will see you as a friend, which you do not want.

If she is attracted to you she will ask you to be exclusive and become her boyfriend.

This is a very basic question that you asked. No shame in that, but it shows you are pretty uneducated in dating. I would recommend reading Corey Wayne, How to be a 3% man. That book will answer your question far better than I just did. I wish I had had that knowledge when I was your age.

Good luck.
 

mrgoodstuff

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How do I tell a girl that I like her and I want her to be my girlfriend
YOU DONT! She tells you! She should be bothering you to be your girlfriend after you have had sex serveral times. You should be having physical intimacy within several dates, if you do not, then she's not INTERESTED enough in YOU. If you violate the order you will be used for your non sexual attention and energy.

If you allow yourself to be USED for your non sexual attention and energy then no other women will be attracted to you. Guard your masculinity.
 

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RangerMIke

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How do I tell a girl that I like her and I want her to be my girlfriend
You don't.

You are ruining the fun for her when you do this and if you make things too easy she will never really value you. Get "The System" by Doc Love. It's not cheap but well worth it. He is quick... to the point and something you can read over and over again until it sinks in.

Other low cost options recommended will work too, but with Cory Wayne you have to filter out all the Tony Robbins self-help BS, and put up with the fact that Wayne rambles on like a chick, but all his content is free, but trying to read his book over and over again to me would be like taking a beating, he's got some good stuff in it, but DAMN... it's boring as fvck. AMS... also good, but his approach isn't designed to get a GF... I mean who wants a GF that is licking you @ss.

Women love sitting around talking to each other... trying to figure you out. They really LOVE this sh1t. If you delivery yourself on a silver try she has nothing to talk about.
 

Black Widow Void

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Welcome aboard. I see that you are a new member.

As you can already see from your replies, a lot of members run to their little playbook on how to do things with women – no differently than a preacher thumps his Bible.

So far it is not illegal to think for oneself.

There are several forum members here that are divorced or married. The sort of makes you wonder… Did they wait around for the female to propose to them? The posting and behavior these days would sure seem to suggest this.

If you’re interested in a partnership, naturally you don’t want to rush in after the first day, week or even the first month… But if it’s been adequate time spent together and there seems to be a mutual interest, then there’s no crime in implying that she has earned your consideration for exclusivity.

Just be sure that your motives aren’t out of insecurity, jealousy or possessiveness. If you are confident in who you are and how you feel about her, this will say more, than taking advice from those ; running to a playbook and trying to calculate the right time and right thing to say.

There’s an old saying… It’s not *what* you say but *how* you say it.
 

Hamurabimbi

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There’s no hard & fast answer. I asked my current GF. But my previous two asked me. There comes a point where you’re always together. The time just seems right.
 

catsmeow

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A different perspective to consider.

Do you want to be a strong leader and lead the relationship?. Or would you rather SHE be the leader and you passively follow?

IF you want to be a strong masculine leader and you believe she's worthy of you, tell her you'd like her to join you on your journey and gauge her response.

Not ask, but tell.

As has been said on this forum many times, you allow a woman to lead, she may lead your relationship straight into the ground and I'm a woman saying that.

Feminine women don't lead.

If you're a smart and strong leader, you won't allow that.

You can't just be a leader some of the time, it must be all the time otherwise a woman will think you're a wishy washy coward and weak.

Assertively tell her what you want, and allow her the opportunity to follow.

She either chooses to join you on the journey, or she doesn't. If she doesn't, it's ciao baby, simple as that.
 
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SoSuave666

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A different perspective to consider.

Do you want to be a strong leader and lead the relationship?. Or would you rather SHE be the leader and you passively follow?

IF you want to be a strong masculine leader and you believe she's worthy of you, tell her you'd like her to join you on your journey and gauge her response.

Not ask, but tell.

As has been said on this forum many times, you allow a woman to lead, she may lead your relationship straight into the ground and I'm a woman saying that.

Feminine women don't lead.

If you're a smart and strong leader, you won't allow that.

You can't just be a leader some of the time, it must be all the time otherwise a woman will think you're a wishy washy coward and weak.

Assertively tell her what you want, and allow her the opportunity to follow.

She either chooses to join you on the journey, or she doesn't. If she doesn't, it's ciao baby, simple as that.
IME women very rarely straight up ask “do you want to be my boyfriend.” Often times they ask open ended questions hinting at it, and that is good enough for me to introduce monogamy, if I deem her good enough for that role in my life.

“what are we doing?”
“Where is this going?”
“How many other women are you dating?”
“What do you think of us?”
“What are you looking for?”
“Do you see me in your future?”
“I could fvck you forever”

^^all of those and plenty more indicate a woman who wants to be exclusive to me. She is telling me she wants me to lock her up, she’s ready. It’s now up to me to lead this woman down whatever path I want the relationship to take. Often times I don’t want exclusivity and we do the plate path until she inevitably moves on after 6 months trying to change my mind along the way. Rarely do I engage in the relationship route. That is for truly rare women.
 

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catsmeow

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IME women very rarely straight up ask “do you want to be my boyfriend.” Often times they ask open ended questions hinting at it, and that is good enough for me to introduce monogamy, if I deem her good enough for that role in my life.

“what are we doing?”
“Where is this going?”
“How many other women are you dating?”
“What do you think of us?”
“What are you looking for?”
“Do you see me in your future?”
“I could fvck you forever”

^^all of those and plenty more indicate a woman who wants to be exclusive to me. She is telling me she wants me to lock her up, she’s ready. It’s now up to me to lead this woman down whatever path I want the relationship to take. Often times I don’t want exclusivity and we do the plate path until she inevitably moves on after 6 months trying to change my mind along the way. Rarely do I engage in the relationship route. That is for truly rare women.
That's cool, there's no right or wrong, imo.

I've done what's quoted above. My current boyfriend did what I suggested which I admired and respected him for. In fact, it turned me on, gave me "tingles." As some of you guys refer to female sexual arousal.

He's a strong leader and it came naturally to him. I doubt he even had to think about it.

Just offering a different perspective tis all, OP can do what he thinks is best for him and his relationship.
 
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FlexpertHamilton

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I almost wanted to do this with a girl I'm seeing lately. Well not so much that, but the "exclusive" talk saying you want to move on to something more serious.

I do not think men should be the ones to bring this up. You end up showing your cards and putting all your eggs in one basket, and it removes the mystery/chase. Plus it's straight up not helpful to slap a label on something, especially early on.

If she wants to be in a relationship, she'll bring it up.
 

firstbornunicorn

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Maybe don't ask for the label right off the bat. But do ask for exclusivity if you want it. As a guy you often have to lead and the right woman would respond positively to being wanted by a guy she also wants.
 

catsmeow

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Don’t. It is her job.

Monogamy is the last thing a man should want. She needs to be the one forcing you into it.
That's the thing though, some men are ready to settle down and start a family.

My bf is mid 40's, he has a business, his purpose he is focused on and he's done chasing women so was ready.

I agree with you, if you don't want monogamy or exclusivity, then don't ask her (or tell her). It's not what you want.

My suggestion was for men who DO want it which I gathered the OP does, hence this thread.

No woman should have to force a man into anything he doesn't want, and if that's the case even if/when SHE asks, best to tell her no and carry on as is.

You may lose her but what's the alternative? Accepting her frame when it's the last thing you want? Why would any man want to do that?
 
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