"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to Next a girl you really like?

demonic

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How the hell do you guys manage to "Next" a girl you really really like and thought you had a future with?.

I know it's lame to ask but this is one of the most difficult things i've come across.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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intraining

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Its really hard to do well for me it is but i guess the only thing i can tell you is try to block out everything that reminds you of her.If you nexted her recently it may be a while until she really gets out of your head but then again i dont kno how strong of a person you are.
 

demonic

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I think i could next her, but i guess you have that feeling in the back of your head "will i ever meet that girl who makes me feel like this again" i know this is AFC stuff.

I'm not normally like this, totally out of char for me...just not easy.
 

Love_Games?!?

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I'm in the same situation bro... you gotta keep yourself busy for sure. If your lazin around it gives you time to think, and more than likely you'll be thinking about her. So go out and do whatever... especially date new chicks!
 

drmeathead

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no contact with her and lots of contact with the other 3 billion plus women of the world
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Micheal Moon

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Focusing on other women and avoiding all contact. Out of sight out of mind.
 

aliasguy

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Why do you have to "next" her?

Did she LJBF you or turn you down or what?
 

sexy_kuta

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drmeathead said:
no contact with her and lots of contact with the other 3 billion plus women of the world
such little words yet big meanings.

this is the best post in the whole thread, its your ultimate tool.

SPIN PLATES
 

DJ1234

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yes, why did you have to NEXT her?

There just seems to be so much emphasis of nexting a girl for any reason at all, Was it absolutely necessary?

If it was...it's tuff nexting a girl but putting you rfocus on other things and having a mentality of blocking out any memories of her can help. GL.
 

Mental

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demonic said:
How the hell do you guys manage to "Next" a girl you really really like and thought you had a future with?.

I know it's lame to ask but this is one of the most difficult things i've come across.
I think part of it is to:

1) Have so many incredible women that you're going for, as well as some really cool genuine female friends.

2) Being really busy helps at times.

Now, as to the first part, I have no idea how to go about that. Most of my friends are dudes.

Being busy can be helpful, in that you're hopefully not always so preoccupied with a particular woman. It's noot so good when you become too busy to talk with women, or meet women. Work can become a crutch, too, so it has to be a balance.

Personally, holidays were hell. I was busy. Then all the social stuff got canceled, and there weren't any parties. Nothing starts up until next week, so I've got to wait another week to get a chance to hang out with women.

As far as women go, nothings going to happen at least for another month. I'm going to see what I can do to get my social life back on track with women, and have more options, cause I can start to feel that "i'm getting nowhere" frustration, which will lead to anger.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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wjh

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About four months ago I let go of the girl I was truly in love with.

She needed it, I needed it. I still think about her. Sometimes constantly.

There was a lead up to our break up of fighting and miscommunication.

Unfortunately, we had to end. All I did was tell her that I couldn't do this anymore. She understood. It was very, very difficult.

There was some communication, sporatically at first. Now, it's pretty much over. I've given myself closure in my own mind. I have no choice in the matter. Even though this was the girl I thought I was going to eventually marry.

What I've resolved to do is work on myself as much as possible. I've been chatting girls up, groups of them even, going on a few small dates. Nothing serious. I'm not ready for anything serious.

I've been trying to hang out with friends as much as possible and develop my career.

That's it.

Knowing you made the right decision, working on yourself (staying busy) and time without her is the only way I know how to move on.

My ex wrote me an e-mail Friday, telling me happy new years, apologizing for some of the things she did. I didn't respond. Yesterday she sent me a follow-up e-mail telling me that she understood why I didn't respond.

It's taking every ounce of my spirit to not e-mail or call her. I have to detach and if I'm available whenever she sends me an email or calls me, I will never grow beyond this. It's incredibly difficult but the only way.
 

wjh

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I also don't believe that other women is the answer. Although it can definitely help to ease the pain.

The source for your happiness must lie within yourself.
 

penkitten

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why don't you just tell her that you realize that nothing is wrong between the two of you, and you really do like her a lot, but you have so many things going on in your life that you just do not feel like you can devote the time needed to be in a relationship. tell her that she deserves to know so that she doesn't waste her time on you and that you are being honest with her because you do care about her and you still want to be friends?
 

Snow Plowman

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It's about having an abundance mentality...really look at what your learning your about to become a man of options, so losing this one girl shouldn't be a fear.

I'm to focused in the moment to worry about where this interaction is headed. I will have and offer a great experience to the chicks whether its 2mins or 2 years.

Of course you'll feel those things, but when it comes to NEXTING its basically a girl who has crossed one of your lines. I think MANY people on this site NEXT way to quickly, me personally NEXTING is something that has to do with stuff I will and will not tolerate.

Flaking doesn't necessarily mean NEXT for me because I'll just put the # low in rotation and call back even a month later and if she forgets who I was it allows me to re game. But as far as say, she does something that is very annoying that I dislike I'd walk away no matter if we were having many weeks of great experiences.
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Before I met my previous girlfriend. I was dating this one chick I really liked. I thought she was great and a unique girl. Always had fun hanging out with her. Anyways, I cut her out and started a new draft. I was a little bummed at first but, I kept positive about all the other girls I get to meet. So, keeping positive and not letting it bring me down I went out and gamed other women. Turns out I found a girl I liked better than her. Which, is now my previous girlfriend.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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demonic

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I had no choice but to next her guys, she was a (Self harmer) among other things like (she hears voices) the sad thing is at first i had no clue about these things.

I carried on with the relationship because i really liked her, but the last straw came when she said she could'nt see me ALL this week as she was too busy.Now as her bf you'de have though she could've made more of an effort.
 

Effington

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It's definitely one of the harder things to do, but the main key (to quitting anything, really) is to keep yourself busy. If you're busy, you're not thinking about what you're not doing. However, it's much easier said than done.
 
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