"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How to handle your friends who complain about you getting laid more than them

corrector

corrector

Master Don Juan
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So did your friend get laid from your plate? I have a $100 bet riding on this. Update.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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P

Paper Crane

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I feel like a few people were in for an update of this so..

We meet up and all, I got the chick with me. My dudes all like not expecting it and ****. So I just act like she's someone I knew from college that I ran into. Had some drinks with them and I said I gotta bounce but if they wanted to they can hang out. Breh.. this man looked up at me like I was crazy. I told him sorry dude I gotta run but im sure you dont mind keeping her company. left it up to him. She already started giving him some flirty signs because I told her to but she wasn't going too hard.. Either way I'm sure he'll capitalize on it.

He's not a loser or anything just caught in a dry spell. Cheering for my homeboy. I know a lot of you guys had negative views toward him hating on me or whatever, but one thing I wouldn't do is turn my back on someone who's a little jelly. Doesn't make him a bad friend.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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