"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How to get in-state??

Magnatolia

Don Juan
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Hi all,

Read a post about being in-state so basically everything is easy and smooth. What exactly is in-state and how do I achieve this, or at least what can I do to head towards being in-state?

I actually find that I am usually in-state at things like music festivals. The last one I made about 8 male friends that I hung out with listening to the music. And danced with several women - 1 or 2 of them actually prodded me at one point because I stopped dancing. And a few others chatted to me.

But in any other situation, even nightclubs and pubs, I'm a shocker. I just can't get in-state.

All advice is appreciated.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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I just feed them, and when I feel their vulnerability I get in them, I don't lie and I definately NEVER make ANY male friends, I just already realize and know that when it comes to a girl, another mutha****kin penis won't help my situation.
 

Grizou

Don Juan
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If it was not for some very good guy friends I met recently, I would have never been able to get it on with one of the hottest women I have met so far... but that is just my piece of cake! In this sense, if you are good with meeting guy friends you should not bother, because friends always know other interesting people.

On the question of how to get in state? I'll leave that to the "pros" on here, I think you should just go out for the fun of it and not with the overall ambition of hooking up with 10 girls a night. Many people will probably tell you, you should go for as many approaches as possible. That is true if you wanna overcome approach anxiety. If you just want to get in state, go to parties because you like parties, go to pubs with friends because you like it. It will make you feel more comfortable and "at home", eventually you start to own the place and getting to know some nice women will come as a very nice sideeffect I reckon.
 

r0cky

Master Don Juan
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For me the best way to get in state is to start having fun right away. Don't linger around at the beguinning. For example last night bar hopping I approached the first person I saw as I entered any bar. It doesn't matter who it is. By the 3rd approach I was feeling like God. Also, getting a rejection out of the way will make you feel great. Like going up to the bitc*iest group of girls and asking them if they want to be part of your orgy.
 

AKA FLEX

Master Don Juan
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r0cky said:
For me the best way to get in state is to start having fun right away. Don't linger around at the beguinning. For example last night bar hopping I approached the first person I saw as I entered any bar. It doesn't matter who it is. By the 3rd approach I was feeling like God. Also, getting a rejection out of the way will make you feel great. Like going up to the bitc*iest group of girls and asking them if they want to be part of your orgy.
This is good advice here. When I go out on the town, there is a high correlation between getting rejected at the beginning of the night and getting laid at the end of the night.

Once you're in the mindset that you can approach any chick and laugh off rejection, things start to fall into place quickly.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Poonani Maker

Master Don Juan
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Working VERY hard usually gets me in state for the weekend. I know I've paid my dues. But if I'm not working and I'm Really hard up for jolting myself into state, I'll watch a movie that makes me Respond to it emotionally (usually love). I know it sounds corny, but you can't go wrong with love. I like to be loving to everyone, and if a woman wants to return that love and more then ok. No guys please.
 
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