Hi, I'm a recently unplugged guy trying to completely get rid of my AFC mentality. My problem is, social proof is clearly an important aspect in attracting women, but how can I go about generating this social proof when the majority of the people who know me still consider me to be an AFC and therefore do not respect me enough to be treated as a social leader. How can I change people's opinions and become a leader in social situations?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
How to gain social proof?
- Thread starter Childish1
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
for opnion of others only overtime you will make that happen, but also you shouldn't care much for what they think.
in another note too if they was supose to be your friends and they don't respect you I think you need new friends
NickAdams713
Don Juan
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Time to get all Zen on you here. The best way to gain social proof, is to not care about social proof.
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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Not gonna help a beginner though. It's going to help going out solo and making new friends - your old friends will at first refuse to acknowledge you as a leader. I hope you live in a big city - train&experiment with new people. So just keep at it and over time you will be fine.
Your old friends will take a longer time to recognize you. Your family, possibly, never.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
You can get some social validation in bars and clubs that you frequent. One mentioned getting peoples names in grocery stores and restaurants that way you can call for that person and it appears that everyone knows you.
Arcturus
Don Juan
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Social proof is a nice perk but you don't HAVE to have it. If you really want it. Pick up a very ugly girl and friendzone her. Like a 3/10, this is effortless. Next friend a hotter girl in her social circle or take the 3 to a party and pick up a 5. Use 5 to get 7 etc...