Hi, I'm a recently unplugged guy trying to completely get rid of my AFC mentality. My problem is, social proof is clearly an important aspect in attracting women, but how can I go about generating this social proof when the majority of the people who know me still consider me to be an AFC and therefore do not respect me enough to be treated as a social leader. How can I change people's opinions and become a leader in social situations?
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
How to gain social proof?
- Thread starter Childish1
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
for opnion of others only overtime you will make that happen, but also you shouldn't care much for what they think.
in another note too if they was supose to be your friends and they don't respect you I think you need new friends
NickAdams713
Don Juan
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Time to get all Zen on you here. The best way to gain social proof, is to not care about social proof.
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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Not gonna help a beginner though. It's going to help going out solo and making new friends - your old friends will at first refuse to acknowledge you as a leader. I hope you live in a big city - train&experiment with new people. So just keep at it and over time you will be fine.
Your old friends will take a longer time to recognize you. Your family, possibly, never.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
You can get some social validation in bars and clubs that you frequent. One mentioned getting peoples names in grocery stores and restaurants that way you can call for that person and it appears that everyone knows you.
Arcturus
Don Juan
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Social proof is a nice perk but you don't HAVE to have it. If you really want it. Pick up a very ugly girl and friendzone her. Like a 3/10, this is effortless. Next friend a hotter girl in her social circle or take the 3 to a party and pick up a 5. Use 5 to get 7 etc...