Hi, I'm a recently unplugged guy trying to completely get rid of my AFC mentality. My problem is, social proof is clearly an important aspect in attracting women, but how can I go about generating this social proof when the majority of the people who know me still consider me to be an AFC and therefore do not respect me enough to be treated as a social leader. How can I change people's opinions and become a leader in social situations?
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
How to gain social proof?
- Thread starter Childish1
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
for opnion of others only overtime you will make that happen, but also you shouldn't care much for what they think.
in another note too if they was supose to be your friends and they don't respect you I think you need new friends
NickAdams713
Don Juan
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Time to get all Zen on you here. The best way to gain social proof, is to not care about social proof.
Huffman
Master Don Juan
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Not gonna help a beginner though. It's going to help going out solo and making new friends - your old friends will at first refuse to acknowledge you as a leader. I hope you live in a big city - train&experiment with new people. So just keep at it and over time you will be fine.
Your old friends will take a longer time to recognize you. Your family, possibly, never.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
You can get some social validation in bars and clubs that you frequent. One mentioned getting peoples names in grocery stores and restaurants that way you can call for that person and it appears that everyone knows you.
Arcturus
Don Juan
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Social proof is a nice perk but you don't HAVE to have it. If you really want it. Pick up a very ugly girl and friendzone her. Like a 3/10, this is effortless. Next friend a hotter girl in her social circle or take the 3 to a party and pick up a 5. Use 5 to get 7 etc...