"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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How to fight back at jealousy :

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Aiken_Drum

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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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dice

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that was probably the best article ive read on fear/jealousy/insecurity
 
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Aiken_Drum

Master Don Juan
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Yeah, it has really helped me out.

The main point is to shift your focus. I'm trying to radically convert myself.
The point is, if a person loves you, has great sex and is a great companion to you, why should you even care what she does on her time without you?

It sounds hard to grasp, but I hope I can some day...
 
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SmoothTalker

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That's only a good attitude to an extent. If you start getting serious with a girl, for example get to the point where you can start having sex without condoms because she is on the pill, or maybe you've gotten married and are trying to have kids, you have damn good reasons to care what she does when she isn't with you.

Otherwise you might be dealing with herpes and raising somebody elses kid.

Actually you can get herpes even with a condom so...

Of course the insecure jealous boyfriend thing will do you no good, but being okay with her doing absolutely whatever isn't a good idea either.
 
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