"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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How to fight back at jealousy :

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Aiken_Drum

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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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dice

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that was probably the best article ive read on fear/jealousy/insecurity
 
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Aiken_Drum

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Yeah, it has really helped me out.

The main point is to shift your focus. I'm trying to radically convert myself.
The point is, if a person loves you, has great sex and is a great companion to you, why should you even care what she does on her time without you?

It sounds hard to grasp, but I hope I can some day...
 
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SmoothTalker

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That's only a good attitude to an extent. If you start getting serious with a girl, for example get to the point where you can start having sex without condoms because she is on the pill, or maybe you've gotten married and are trying to have kids, you have damn good reasons to care what she does when she isn't with you.

Otherwise you might be dealing with herpes and raising somebody elses kid.

Actually you can get herpes even with a condom so...

Of course the insecure jealous boyfriend thing will do you no good, but being okay with her doing absolutely whatever isn't a good idea either.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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