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How the F-ck Are Guys Getting Dates?

bonesmahoney

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I used to rely heavily on social circles as well as clubs and bars for some cold approach game. I also used online dating apps occasionally.

For me, IRL techniques are now essentially over. I've been hitting up girls I've known online for dates, with some success, but I'm socializing a lot less in general for obvious reasons.

WTF are you all doing for dating?

I suspect a huge percentage of the male population has simply given up resorting to porn, occasional prostitutes, or even sex dolls?!? Some bros are occasionally hooking up with girls from work, but there has to be a huge hit to the dating game in the past year or so.
 

f(x)

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I’m not dating until I get vaxxed, then it’s on. I recognize opportunities and signals when I’m out, but forgoing them is helping me tap into the “abundance mentality.”

In the meantime I’m learning how to invest, improving my software development skills, and getting my physique back to what it was pre-pandemic.

That being said, I hope I get the jab before the summer season starts. That’s prime time in my part of the world.

I guess I’m waiting-for-the-jab-cel at the moment, haha
 

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KindredSpiritzz

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OLD- I have them delivered right to my front door. Last weekend first date came to my house, next weekend got a different one driving down from 3 hrs away for our first date. Something about having a hot tub appeals to women, add to that a little text game and i dont even have to leave the house. Course i realize its just a run of good luck that'll dry up sooner rather than later so i aint getting too big of a head over it. Just nice when things go my way once in awhile.
 

bonesmahoney

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You guys don't care about faceberg or jewgle tracking your every move, location and relationships with those dating apps?
 

Glassguy

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By the end of the week I'll have had 4 different dates with 4 different chicks. No OLD.
One is 14 yrs younger and I used to bang her sister, who is my age, in high school. She knows this.
Two are from Facebook, which is EASY dates if you know how to play it.
The other is a chick I met irl just a couple of weeks ago.

All 4 texting me constantly.

Its not hard but my recommendation would be to put your effort into where you're getting results. For me I don't do bars and clubs. Waste of money.
 

Igetit!

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I used to rely heavily on social circles as well as clubs and bars for some cold approach game. I also used online dating apps occasionally.

For me, IRL techniques are now essentially over. I've been hitting up girls I've known online for dates, with some success, but I'm socializing a lot less in general for obvious reasons.

WTF are you all doing for dating?
What are we doing to get dates? Well......I can't speak for others,I can only share what I myself do.

Uhh......have you tried ASKING? You know....like getting into a conversation with a girl,then ASKING her out?

Same with online dating....you "match" with a chick,start a conversation,then ASK her out. I got a date planned for Wednesday.

You guys don't care about faceberg or jewgle tracking your every move, location and relationships with those dating apps?
Well,I don't have FaceBook,and Google.......I'm pretty sure they have more important issues to worry about than what girl I ask out,or what we decide to do out on a date. Think you might be a tad bit paranoid.


Far as covid.....well,if a girl doesn't want to go out with me for fear of catching covid,then I respect her wishes........

and ask out SOMEONE ELSE.

Most of the chicks I've met don't really seem too concerned with it. I mean we sit at a table face to face without masks,talk,laugh,eat,etc,etc. I asked one girl if she was worried about it,she said NO....then said she was immune,and showed me a pic of her covid diagnosis. She had already had it and recovered from it.

I try to meet people on THEIR comfort level. So if a girl is scared,I understand.....cause covid ain't no joke........but we aren't compatible,cause I'm NOT scared. I don't try to talk her out of her belief or persuade her otherwise,I just accept it....

then move on to someone else.


But yeah......you just need to ask women out. I honestly don't know of any other way to get dates,unless you want people to fix you up.
 

Xenom0rph

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Bruh, a lot of guys are straight up lying...

Bars and nightclubs were already dying even before the scamdemic. Women would go to bars with groups of friends (males and females) to have fun not to hookup. They got their validation on social media so there was no need for validation from creepy guys in clubs and bars.

The only guys with a fighting chance on OLD are the really goodlooking guys. Normies dont make the cut...

It speaks volumes about the fragility of male ego when guys feel the need to lie to random strangers on mens help forums.

Buddy Boyos, self-delusion will only hurt you, the time has come for brutal honesty: 80% of men are incels in 2021.....

EDIT: In 2019, guys were still able to have somewhat of a nightlife, so at the very least it still gave them some (small) degree of hope(cope).... but COVID19 was the final nail in the coffin that sealed the fate for most guys.....

Now, guys can't even cling the foolish hope of random cold approaches at nightclubs. The only interaction with women that most guys have are either at their job, random cashiers at the store, their small circle of friends, or in their immediate communities.

The scamdemic has caused people (especially women) to become more insular and people have retreated into their immediate circle of family and friends - they're not going to get involved with a random unknown unless that random dude is exceptionally handsome....
 
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BackInTheGame78

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Bruh, a lot of guys are straight up lying...

Bars and nightclubs were already dying even before the scamdemic. Women would go to bars with groups of friends (males and females) to have fun not to hookup. They got their validation on social media so there was no need for validation from creepy guys in clubs and bars.

The only guys with a fighting chance on OLD are the really goodlooking guys. Normies dont make the cut...

It speaks volumes about the fragility of male ego when guys feel the need to lie to random strangers on mens help forums.

Buddy Boyos, self-delusion will only hurt you, the time has come for brutal honesty: 80% of men are incels in 2021.....

EDIT: In 2019, guys were still able to have somewhat of a nightlife, so at the very least it still gave them some (small) degree of hope(cope).... but COVID19 was the final nail in the coffin that sealed the fate for most guys.....

Now, guys can't even cling the foolish hope of random cold approaches at nightclubs. The only interaction with women that most guys have are either at their job, random cashiers at the store, their small circle of friends, or in their immediate communities.

The scamdemic has caused people (especially women) to become more insular and people have retreated into their immediate circle of family and friends - they're not going to get involved with a random unknown unless that random dude is exceptionally handsome....
Completely not true on OLD. The ones who say this are the ones who don't use it to any large degree.
 

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SW15

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WTF are you all doing for dating?
Since the pandemic started, I’ve only had sex with women that I had sex with prior to the pandemic. The pandemic makes forming new relationships difficult.

there has to be a huge hit to the dating game in the past year or so.
There has been. Masks make approaching at the gym or grocery store next to impossible. I’ve not been in a mall since before the pandemic. The mall would be the same as gyms and grocery stores. Fewer people are also likely go to malls as well. Before the pandemic, I didn’t like mall approaching as much as gyms/fitness classes and grocery stores. There were guys who could do mall approaching much better than I could.

The most viable option for meeting new people now is outdoors until herd immunity occurs and indoor masking ends. Walking/hiking paths are a really good option. Men who live near a beach are better positioned.

The people who entered the pandemic in relationships had an advantage but many of them frittered away their advantage, as divorce filings have increased as have non-marital breakups. I think that even a lot of men in mediocre to slightly subpar relationships are “sheltering-in-place” in their relationships, even more so than they would in a non-pandemic time.

Bruh, a lot of guys are straight up lying...

Bars and nightclubs were already dying even before the scamdemic. Women would go to bars with groups of friends (males and females) to have fun not to hookup. They got their validation on social media so there was no need for validation from creepy guys in clubs and bars.

EDIT: In 2019, guys were still able to have somewhat of a nightlife, so at the very least it still gave them some (small) degree of hope(cope).... but COVID19 was the final nail in the coffin that sealed the fate for most guys.....

Now, guys can't even cling the foolish hope of random cold approaches at nightclubs.
The 2010s were not a good time for bar game for those reasons you mentioned. You’re exactly right that in the late 2010s (or 2019 as you call it), men had a slim amount of hope at bars. I had de-emphasized bars for pickup in the first half of the 2010s.

Even if you didn’t use bars for initial approaching, the bars of the 2010s were still useful in the seduction ecosystem as venues for hosting early-stage dates. All the app swipers were doing that, as well as the non-bar venue approachers. The loss of bars is a very big loss because it is extremely difficult to cut bars out of the early stage seduction equation.

The only guys with a fighting chance on OLD are the really goodlooking guys. Normies dont make the cut...
In October, I had this conversation with a 6’4”, good looking guy who is my friend. He’s been in the same relationship for 5+ years and got married last year. He’s become more beta over time. In his heyday of pickup in the early-mid 2010s, he was getting laid a lot from bars and even supplemented on Match.com before swipe apps got big. He said that he perceived it wasn’t worth doing the apps unless you were a top 5% guy because women have too many choices. I wouldn’t call this guy red pill or black pill in the present day, nor would I have called him those things in the early-mid 2010s. Purple pill when he was most prolific in racking up a solid notch count.

I said the top 10% can do swipe apps.

I also think there’s a market for the oldsters (50+) who are looking the date other oldsters that is a little more forgiving. If you’re in your 20s or 30s and trying to use swipe apps, you have to be a top 10% guy. If you’re a 40 something guy looking to date 40 something women, you still have to be better than average. Maybe top 20% of 40 somethings.

Buddy Boyos, self-delusion will only hurt you, the time has come for brutal honesty: 80% of men are incels in 2021.....
The general idea is true but the specific number could be an exaggeration.

The typical guy is not a participant on SoSuave. The typical guy is not a pickup artist. The typical guy is not an acne-ridden, overweight neckbeard as well. The typical guy is a guy who is either married or in a multiyear relationship. Those guys in established relationships are not getting laid all that much but they aren’t incel. A married guy plowing his wife’s vag twice a month sounds like a good deal to a complete incel like Elliot Rodger was, but it is not a good deal in general.

A lot of the unattached guys get laid less than a reasonable person would think, which is why a lot of non-top tier men “shelter-in-place” in relationships, pandemic or no pandemic. The typical male (many would call this man AFC/beta in this forum) is reliant upon extended relationships to get laid and isn’t getting laid much in between relationships.

The only interaction with women that most guys have are either at their job, random cashiers at the store, their small circle of friends, or in their immediate communities.

The scamdemic has caused people (especially women) to become more insular and people have retreated into their immediate circle of family and friends - they're not going to get involved with a random unknown unless that random dude is exceptionally handsome....
You’re overestimating how much interaction men have with women at their jobs. White collar men have been primarily working at home for the past 12 months. More of their interaction with women has been on Zoom video calls and phone calls. Additionally, fewer romantic relationships have been forming in workplaces since the 1990s, as the white-collar culture has dissuaded romances from forming. Blue collar men work jobs that typically don’t have a lot of women present as co-workers. How many auto mechanics and construction site workers meet women at work?

More men have weaker social circles now than they did in 1990. Despite the ability to have hundreds of thousands of friends/connections on various social media platforms, the typical guy who isn’t living in the same city as where he spent his birth-age 18 years (if he was lucky enough to even be in the same place his entire childhood) doesn’t have a strong social circle. The guys I’ve know who have used social circle best were guys who were geographically fixed to one specific area their whole lives. These guys are typically not players either. They are either serial monogamists (guys who continually get in 1-5 year long relationships and never marry) or guys who get married, have long relationships, and the occasional divorce and start over.
 

f(x)

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How? All I see are masked up zombies with terrified eyes afraid of everyone.
True. I live near the beach in a sub-tropical climate. There are plenty of maskless people around. The beach and nearby trails are the one exception I make to not wearing a mask when in public, but I take precautions to distance myself from others. I have struck up conversations with women in these locations and probably could have escalated.
 

Kotaix

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How? All I see are masked up zombies with terrified eyes afraid of everyone.
Most people are clueless sheep. This is your chance to find good women that aren't cowering in fear because the fvcking news tells them what to think. The new have been lying thru their teeth for years.

As for where you can approach women? Literally everywhere you go is full of women you can approach. You don't need to be in a "social setting" like a bar or a club. Even the grocery store is a perfect place to do it.

True. I live near the beach in a sub-tropical climate. There are plenty of maskless people around. The beach and nearby trails are the one exception I make to not wearing a mask when in public, but I take precautions to distance myself from others. I have struck up conversations with women in these locations and probably could have escalated.
The Atlantic is a propaganda tabloid. I put zero faith in anything they say.
 

f(x)

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I’ve always considered The Atlantic to be a centrist publication. Which media outlets do you recommend?
 

JayAce

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Bruh, a lot of guys are straight up lying...

Bars and nightclubs were already dying even before the scamdemic. Women would go to bars with groups of friends (males and females) to have fun not to hookup. They got their validation on social media so there was no need for validation from creepy guys in clubs and bars.

The only guys with a fighting chance on OLD are the really goodlooking guys. Normies dont make the cut...

It speaks volumes about the fragility of male ego when guys feel the need to lie to random strangers on mens help forums.

Buddy Boyos, self-delusion will only hurt you, the time has come for brutal honesty: 80% of men are incels in 2021.....

EDIT: In 2019, guys were still able to have somewhat of a nightlife, so at the very least it still gave them some (small) degree of hope(cope).... but COVID19 was the final nail in the coffin that sealed the fate for most guys.....

Now, guys can't even cling the foolish hope of random cold approaches at nightclubs. The only interaction with women that most guys have are either at their job, random cashiers at the store, their small circle of friends, or in their immediate communities.

The scamdemic has caused people (especially women) to become more insular and people have retreated into their immediate circle of family and friends - they're not going to get involved with a random unknown unless that random dude is exceptionally handsome....
100%
 
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