"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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How I Delt With a Mouthy Ho Yesterday

Charm

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A big group (25) of us were playing ultimate frisbee last night at the park and a girl shows up about 2 hours after everyone else had wearing makeup (eyeliner, lipstick, whatever else) and long black dressy pants and a dressy top, we'll call her HBMouthy6.5 and sits down on a park bench. A few guys immediately saw her and yelled at her to come play but I stayed focused on the game barely giving her any attention. Not too long later she was playing and had obvious ultimate frisbee experience because she knew how to throw and make plays. About 45 minutes later I made a catch in the inzone while a girl on the other team that I've got a history with of having hooked up with before intentionally fouled me and I said "Even with the foul!" to her in jest.

Not long after this from the other side of the feel HBMouthy6.5 yells at me (hey did you ever play ultimate league last year? On the black or Green team? I said nope not last year. I did back in 2003. She then came up to me and said "Oh I remember you, you were real ****y! And then she mockingly said "Even with the foul" so apparently she'd overheard my convo earlier. Now, this girl had never met me before because I'd remember and I was new to ultimate back then and so I know she was just feeding me a line. I fed her one and said "Oh yea, I remember you, you were real snooty." and she says "I still am snooty. You used to be real ****y and now you're still a little ****y" -- now I'm sure there were better C&F or general responses but thats what came to mind and I left it at that.

Anyway wrapping this up, I made a play later that intercepted her toss and we went on to beat her team 10 to 4. She literally stormed off the field to leave and get into her car and on her way off I said "Better Luck Next Time HBMouthy6.5 (her actual name used)" and she stopped and spun around. She looked right at me about to say something and I looked her dead in the eye and gave her a ****y grin (I am ****y afterall she was right about that!) and she grimaced looking visibly pissed and stood there looking absolutely speechless. She looked on the verge of ripping her own hair out as her face got redder and redder and she decided to turn around, got in her car and slammed the door, reversed out with screeching tires and spun off. A bunch of people saw it happen and laughed mentioning to me that she was acting like a major b1tch out on the field. :rock: :rock: :rock:
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Charm

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Man Man said:
Ultimate Frisbee. Serious f*ckin' business.
Holla Holla!
 
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She is a sore loser but not a "Ho" - please don't use that term so casually since it will lose it's meaning when I use it - thanks for your cooperation.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Charm

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Last Man Standing said:
She is a sore loser but not a "Ho" - please don't use that term so casually since it will lose it's meaning when I use it - thanks for your cooperation.
LMS quit being such a Mouthy Ho!
 
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Charm said:
A big group (25) of us were playing ultimate frisbee last night at the park and a girl shows up about 2 hours after everyone else had wearing makeup (eyeliner, lipstick, whatever else) and long black dressy pants and a dressy top, we'll call her HBMouthy6.5 and sits down on a park bench. A few guys immediately saw her and yelled at her to come play but I stayed focused on the game barely giving her any attention. Not too long later she was playing and had obvious ultimate frisbee experience because she knew how to throw and make plays. About 45 minutes later I made a catch in the inzone while a girl on the other team that I've got a history with of having hooked up with before intentionally fouled me and I said "Even with the foul!" to her in jest.

Not long after this from the other side of the feel HBMouthy6.5 yells at me (hey did you ever play ultimate league last year? On the black or Green team? I said nope not last year. I did back in 2003. She then came up to me and said "Oh I remember you, you were real ****y! And then she mockingly said "Even with the foul" so apparently she'd overheard my convo earlier.
Dude, for her to strike up a conversation with you like this and even say these words means she is digging you on some level.

Now, this girl had never met me before because I'd remember and I was new to ultimate back then and so I know she was just feeding me a line. I fed her one and said "Oh yea, I remember you, you were real snooty." and she says "I still am snooty. You used to be real ****y and now you're still a little ****y" -- now I'm sure there were better C&F or general responses but thats what came to mind and I left it at that.
Joseph: Glad you like it! (wink, and a touch on the arm if she is within reach)

Anyway wrapping this up, I made a play later that intercepted her toss and we went on to beat her team 10 to 4. She literally stormed off the field to leave and get into her car and on her way off I said "Better Luck Next Time HBMouthy6.5 (her actual name used)" and she stopped and spun around. She looked right at me about to say something and I looked her dead in the eye and gave her a ****y grin (I am ****y afterall she was right about that!) and she grimaced looking visibly pissed and stood there looking absolutely speechless. She looked on the verge of ripping her own hair out as her face got redder and redder and she decided to turn around, got in her car and slammed the door, reversed out with screeching tires and spun off. A bunch of people saw it happen and laughed mentioning to me that she was acting like a major b1tch out on the field. :rock: :rock: :rock:
Well here is what I think actually happened. The space between her legs was getting wet but she consciously felt you were out to humiliate her and not just attract her. If you don't want to hook up with her, then don't worry about it, although you don't want other, onlooking women that you do like to get the impression that there is never any chance with you.

This is where calibration is key. This is where you want to say in a part-warm, part-condescending voice "awww, c'mere princess" and give her a warm hug. If you like her, then tell her exactly when and where the two of you will be meeting up next. If you don't like her, she becomes a pivot for you when you shake her hand and dismiss her with a friendly "take care". Try it next time and let me know what happens!
 

Charm

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Obsidian said:
charm you don't live in Nashville do you?
I dont live in Nashville but If I'm ever in the area, should I look you up for a Wingman? :D
 

Charm

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Joseph,

I agree that she was digging me on some level. I was exhausted at the time from having worked 8 hours, been at the gym 2 hours and then playing ultimate 2 hours and my brain was not in its best form for quick-witty responses. I could have probably done what you said and taken her comment and out-framed it with "Glad you like it" and giving her the ol "Aww cmere princess" routine. I'll give it a shot next time and I appreciate your feedback, I'm always learning new tricks :)

joseph_went_south said:
Dude, for her to strike up a conversation with you like this and even say these words means she is digging you on some level.

Joseph: Glad you like it! (wink, and a touch on the arm if she is within reach)

Well here is what I think actually happened. The space between her legs was getting wet but she consciously felt you were out to humiliate her and not just attract her. If you don't want to hook up with her, then don't worry about it, although you don't want other, onlooking women that you do like to get the impression that there is never any chance with you.

This is where calibration is key. This is where you want to say in a part-warm, part-condescending voice "awww, c'mere princess" and give her a warm hug. If you like her, then tell her exactly when and where the two of you will be meeting up next. If you don't like her, she becomes a pivot for you when you shake her hand and dismiss her with a friendly "take care". Try it next time and let me know what happens!
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Yapper

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Who the fuck cares?
What was the point of that story? Way to waste everybody's time.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Charm said:
LMS quit being such a Mouthy Ho!
LMAO:crackup:



Anyways, Charm man. This chick comes up and initiates conversation with YOU. regardless of what she says, you gotta attack, and try and seduce her but you got defensive and tried to save your ego/pride. I think this chick wanted you from the get go, and you fumbled the fvck out of it by reading it wrong. 'I remember you last year, you were ****y?' HELLO. she does not need to even talk to you, let alone say she remembers you. Shape up or ship up :cuss:
 

bman

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sounds like you had a chance and blew it.
 

lookyoung

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This braud was interested in you period. She remembered you from 2003. You could have probably got a date from this girl and then a fvck close.

This is my reasoning.

A girl will very rarely call someone ****y that she finds physically unattractive.

Do you think she would call a fat geek ****y?
 

Lust

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This may sound like a stupid question,

But what the FVCK is Ultimate Frisbee?

I live in Aus and have never heard of the term before.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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ryannath

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I don't really know what the fvck ultimate frisbee is either. I'm guessing some kind of frisbee game that is ultimate.
 

Charm

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bman said:
sounds like you had a chance and blew it.
It sure sounds that way :) next time I'll have to provide a better response ;)
 

Charm

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Microphone Fiend said:
LMAO:crackup:



Anyways, Charm man. This chick comes up and initiates conversation with YOU. regardless of what she says, you gotta attack, and try and seduce her but you got defensive and tried to save your ego/pride. I think this chick wanted you from the get go, and you fumbled the fvck out of it by reading it wrong. 'I remember you last year, you were ****y?' HELLO. she does not need to even talk to you, let alone say she remembers you. Shape up or ship up :cuss:
Oh, it was clear that she was making a pass. I was exhausted and didn't have the response I needed simple as that. I said what came to mind.
 
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