"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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How I Delt With a Mouthy Ho Yesterday

Charm

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A big group (25) of us were playing ultimate frisbee last night at the park and a girl shows up about 2 hours after everyone else had wearing makeup (eyeliner, lipstick, whatever else) and long black dressy pants and a dressy top, we'll call her HBMouthy6.5 and sits down on a park bench. A few guys immediately saw her and yelled at her to come play but I stayed focused on the game barely giving her any attention. Not too long later she was playing and had obvious ultimate frisbee experience because she knew how to throw and make plays. About 45 minutes later I made a catch in the inzone while a girl on the other team that I've got a history with of having hooked up with before intentionally fouled me and I said "Even with the foul!" to her in jest.

Not long after this from the other side of the feel HBMouthy6.5 yells at me (hey did you ever play ultimate league last year? On the black or Green team? I said nope not last year. I did back in 2003. She then came up to me and said "Oh I remember you, you were real ****y! And then she mockingly said "Even with the foul" so apparently she'd overheard my convo earlier. Now, this girl had never met me before because I'd remember and I was new to ultimate back then and so I know she was just feeding me a line. I fed her one and said "Oh yea, I remember you, you were real snooty." and she says "I still am snooty. You used to be real ****y and now you're still a little ****y" -- now I'm sure there were better C&F or general responses but thats what came to mind and I left it at that.

Anyway wrapping this up, I made a play later that intercepted her toss and we went on to beat her team 10 to 4. She literally stormed off the field to leave and get into her car and on her way off I said "Better Luck Next Time HBMouthy6.5 (her actual name used)" and she stopped and spun around. She looked right at me about to say something and I looked her dead in the eye and gave her a ****y grin (I am ****y afterall she was right about that!) and she grimaced looking visibly pissed and stood there looking absolutely speechless. She looked on the verge of ripping her own hair out as her face got redder and redder and she decided to turn around, got in her car and slammed the door, reversed out with screeching tires and spun off. A bunch of people saw it happen and laughed mentioning to me that she was acting like a major b1tch out on the field. :rock: :rock: :rock:
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Charm

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Man Man said:
Ultimate Frisbee. Serious f*ckin' business.
Holla Holla!
 
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She is a sore loser but not a "Ho" - please don't use that term so casually since it will lose it's meaning when I use it - thanks for your cooperation.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Charm

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Last Man Standing said:
She is a sore loser but not a "Ho" - please don't use that term so casually since it will lose it's meaning when I use it - thanks for your cooperation.
LMS quit being such a Mouthy Ho!
 
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Charm said:
A big group (25) of us were playing ultimate frisbee last night at the park and a girl shows up about 2 hours after everyone else had wearing makeup (eyeliner, lipstick, whatever else) and long black dressy pants and a dressy top, we'll call her HBMouthy6.5 and sits down on a park bench. A few guys immediately saw her and yelled at her to come play but I stayed focused on the game barely giving her any attention. Not too long later she was playing and had obvious ultimate frisbee experience because she knew how to throw and make plays. About 45 minutes later I made a catch in the inzone while a girl on the other team that I've got a history with of having hooked up with before intentionally fouled me and I said "Even with the foul!" to her in jest.

Not long after this from the other side of the feel HBMouthy6.5 yells at me (hey did you ever play ultimate league last year? On the black or Green team? I said nope not last year. I did back in 2003. She then came up to me and said "Oh I remember you, you were real ****y! And then she mockingly said "Even with the foul" so apparently she'd overheard my convo earlier.
Dude, for her to strike up a conversation with you like this and even say these words means she is digging you on some level.

Now, this girl had never met me before because I'd remember and I was new to ultimate back then and so I know she was just feeding me a line. I fed her one and said "Oh yea, I remember you, you were real snooty." and she says "I still am snooty. You used to be real ****y and now you're still a little ****y" -- now I'm sure there were better C&F or general responses but thats what came to mind and I left it at that.
Joseph: Glad you like it! (wink, and a touch on the arm if she is within reach)

Anyway wrapping this up, I made a play later that intercepted her toss and we went on to beat her team 10 to 4. She literally stormed off the field to leave and get into her car and on her way off I said "Better Luck Next Time HBMouthy6.5 (her actual name used)" and she stopped and spun around. She looked right at me about to say something and I looked her dead in the eye and gave her a ****y grin (I am ****y afterall she was right about that!) and she grimaced looking visibly pissed and stood there looking absolutely speechless. She looked on the verge of ripping her own hair out as her face got redder and redder and she decided to turn around, got in her car and slammed the door, reversed out with screeching tires and spun off. A bunch of people saw it happen and laughed mentioning to me that she was acting like a major b1tch out on the field. :rock: :rock: :rock:
Well here is what I think actually happened. The space between her legs was getting wet but she consciously felt you were out to humiliate her and not just attract her. If you don't want to hook up with her, then don't worry about it, although you don't want other, onlooking women that you do like to get the impression that there is never any chance with you.

This is where calibration is key. This is where you want to say in a part-warm, part-condescending voice "awww, c'mere princess" and give her a warm hug. If you like her, then tell her exactly when and where the two of you will be meeting up next. If you don't like her, she becomes a pivot for you when you shake her hand and dismiss her with a friendly "take care". Try it next time and let me know what happens!
 

Charm

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Obsidian said:
charm you don't live in Nashville do you?
I dont live in Nashville but If I'm ever in the area, should I look you up for a Wingman? :D
 

Charm

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Joseph,

I agree that she was digging me on some level. I was exhausted at the time from having worked 8 hours, been at the gym 2 hours and then playing ultimate 2 hours and my brain was not in its best form for quick-witty responses. I could have probably done what you said and taken her comment and out-framed it with "Glad you like it" and giving her the ol "Aww cmere princess" routine. I'll give it a shot next time and I appreciate your feedback, I'm always learning new tricks :)

joseph_went_south said:
Dude, for her to strike up a conversation with you like this and even say these words means she is digging you on some level.

Joseph: Glad you like it! (wink, and a touch on the arm if she is within reach)

Well here is what I think actually happened. The space between her legs was getting wet but she consciously felt you were out to humiliate her and not just attract her. If you don't want to hook up with her, then don't worry about it, although you don't want other, onlooking women that you do like to get the impression that there is never any chance with you.

This is where calibration is key. This is where you want to say in a part-warm, part-condescending voice "awww, c'mere princess" and give her a warm hug. If you like her, then tell her exactly when and where the two of you will be meeting up next. If you don't like her, she becomes a pivot for you when you shake her hand and dismiss her with a friendly "take care". Try it next time and let me know what happens!
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Yapper

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Who the fuck cares?
What was the point of that story? Way to waste everybody's time.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Charm said:
LMS quit being such a Mouthy Ho!
LMAO:crackup:



Anyways, Charm man. This chick comes up and initiates conversation with YOU. regardless of what she says, you gotta attack, and try and seduce her but you got defensive and tried to save your ego/pride. I think this chick wanted you from the get go, and you fumbled the fvck out of it by reading it wrong. 'I remember you last year, you were ****y?' HELLO. she does not need to even talk to you, let alone say she remembers you. Shape up or ship up :cuss:
 

bman

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sounds like you had a chance and blew it.
 

lookyoung

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This braud was interested in you period. She remembered you from 2003. You could have probably got a date from this girl and then a fvck close.

This is my reasoning.

A girl will very rarely call someone ****y that she finds physically unattractive.

Do you think she would call a fat geek ****y?
 

Lust

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This may sound like a stupid question,

But what the FVCK is Ultimate Frisbee?

I live in Aus and have never heard of the term before.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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ryannath

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I don't really know what the fvck ultimate frisbee is either. I'm guessing some kind of frisbee game that is ultimate.
 

Charm

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bman said:
sounds like you had a chance and blew it.
It sure sounds that way :) next time I'll have to provide a better response ;)
 

Charm

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Microphone Fiend said:
LMAO:crackup:



Anyways, Charm man. This chick comes up and initiates conversation with YOU. regardless of what she says, you gotta attack, and try and seduce her but you got defensive and tried to save your ego/pride. I think this chick wanted you from the get go, and you fumbled the fvck out of it by reading it wrong. 'I remember you last year, you were ****y?' HELLO. she does not need to even talk to you, let alone say she remembers you. Shape up or ship up :cuss:
Oh, it was clear that she was making a pass. I was exhausted and didn't have the response I needed simple as that. I said what came to mind.
 
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