Aspiring_DJ
Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 26, 2007
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I just want to let go and not give a **** what people think or say about me. How do i do it? If you got to this stage what are some things I can tell myself?
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
How do you stop caring what people think?
- Thread starter Aspiring_DJ
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
If you care too much about what other people think, you'll never think for yourself.
If you can't think for yourself, you'll always be a follower.
If you're always a follower, you'll always care what other people think.
And so goes the vicious cycle....
If you can't think for yourself, you'll always be a follower.
If you're always a follower, you'll always care what other people think.
And so goes the vicious cycle....
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2005
- Messages
- 4,476
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- 182
Think of a time that you cared what people thought of you and you followed through on their expectations and were absolutely fvcking miserable and felt like a phony or felt like garbage for living the way they wanted you to.
Then think of a time if any where you disregarded what people thought of you and went for what you wanted and you were incredibly happy.
Basically what I'm getting at is you need to rework your pain pleasure principle that NLP talks about.
You have to associate pain to caring what people think about you and associate pleasure to walking tall and not giving a damn about what other people think of you and doing what you want.
And the best way to do this is to again think of times where caring what other people thought of you made you feel awful and really focus on the pain of this and then think of times where you went against the grain and said screw what other people think I'm doing what I want and it brought you tremendous pleasure.
The re-conditioning of your mind is what I believe you must do.
Then think of a time if any where you disregarded what people thought of you and went for what you wanted and you were incredibly happy.
Basically what I'm getting at is you need to rework your pain pleasure principle that NLP talks about.
You have to associate pain to caring what people think about you and associate pleasure to walking tall and not giving a damn about what other people think of you and doing what you want.
And the best way to do this is to again think of times where caring what other people thought of you made you feel awful and really focus on the pain of this and then think of times where you went against the grain and said screw what other people think I'm doing what I want and it brought you tremendous pleasure.
The re-conditioning of your mind is what I believe you must do.
Why you care what people say about you. Like pook says you are a man and men don't care what others think this is female thinking. Why let someones comment define you? They know nothing about you and what you have done in your life why take what they say seriously. The only comments that hurt most people is what they think is true what someone said about them. Start by working on your inner game the more you love yourself the more people's comments are a joke no phase. Take it easy
Beautiful bro.PHAT Rabbit said:It really comes down to mastering your fear of being alone ("If I screw this up I will lose this person's friendship"), but once you have a lot of options - you are less invested in each interaction. Eventually you'll interact with less "care" about what the other person thinks and find that this approach is actually better in the long run.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
Keep convincing yourself, and you shall become.