"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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How do you bring up a relationship becoming "exclusive?"

I

INXS

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So while I doubt a real DJ would need to ask a woman, "Will you be my girlfriend?" I am left wondering, suppose a DJ meets w oman he likes, and wants to settle down, how does he go about doing it?

A trick I learned (by doing) recently is to bring up into the conversation something along the lines of:

Me: I like labels in life. I think they help make things a lot more clear.

Any other ideas or suggestions to bring up to a woman you want to be exclusive with her?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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S

SELF-MASTERY

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INXS said:
So while I doubt a real DJ would need to ask a woman, "Will you be my girlfriend?"

A trick I learned (by doing) recently is to bring up into the conversation something along the lines of:

Me: I like labels in life. I think they help make things a lot more clear.
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Rose by any other name.....

You could always try being a real man by being honest and direct, but then again that might not be alpha, so we might need a new post asking what is an alpha male allowed to do.
 
T

trajhenkhet02

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I wish you sincre luck in your quest. Trying to push a relationship before the lady does is kind of like fighting gravity. I'm sure she'll give you signs when she wants to make things a bit more serious. If she is not giving you some form of signals, there is a reason.
 
R

Rocker

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If you've played it well enough usually they're the ones asking you what is going on.
 
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SELF-MASTERY

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Rocker said:
If you've played it well enough usually they're the ones asking you what is going on.
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That is ideal, but I don't see a problem with asking her directly.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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IsiMan84

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SELF-MASTERY said:
That is ideal, but I don't see a problem with asking her directly.
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I would have to disagree with that solely on the fact that whoever brings it up first is probably the one who's more concerned about the issue. Since you would be the one basically asking or trying to confirm her approval, you're putting her in power of the situation.
 
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SELF-MASTERY

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AngelusPUA said:
Listen to him and be direct, only pus*ies beat around the bush.
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Right On:up:

If you guys have to worry about abdicating power over every little situation, then you probably don't really have any power to begin with, and everything you do is an act.



Since you would be the one basically asking or trying to confirm her approval, you're putting her in power of the situation.
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:down:

Get Real. I like to know where I stand, and sometimes it doesn't have to be said, but if you want to know ASK. Only sissies worry about lossing power.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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flexion_

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I think the easiest way to handle it is to let her bring it up.

Yes you can be direct but of course if you time it wrong then she'll drop you like a hot wet noodle.
 
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SELF-MASTERY

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How lonh have you known the chick??
 
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