"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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how can i dj a girl to be a friend?

unixguy

Don Juan
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Jul 1, 2003
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sup ??

well here is the short version.

I DJ'd a girl. I got the girl.
We kicked it really good we get along pretty well untill around week 3. we start fighting ALOT!! ..
why? well i get the feeling she is not being honest. i dont trust her but the sex is good. ( i know its wrong but so what )

we get close but i still dont trust her as time goes by. we are still fighting and having sex. we get along about 3 days out of 4.
week 8 we break up. alot of crap happend and it is pretty much over. that was yesterday,

i know it was only 8 and she tells me she doesnt feel the same way about me and that she doesnt think it will work out but that she does love me so we need to just start dating and see what happends. that seems cool and i am down for that. but she has this emotional wall up so high i dont think it going to happend.

tonight she came to gave me something she had of mine not everything but even tonight we started fighting. about me telling my friends that we broke up. she says i shouldnt have and i dont see how it matters.

she asked me what they said. i told her they ddint say anything. and she started to get really ****y i mean really ****y making statements like " they told you that you could do better" ( her tone was you wont ever do better then me ), " they told you i was ugly" , " they told you i am a *****" and so on. I told her i would not let them say things like that about you. but i told her some of my friends were telling me that it was clear that i cared about her but when we were in public that she didnt act like she cared about me.

this set her off!! she started getting defensive first she goes off on my friends saying she thinks it is funny that i beleive anything anyone tells me. then i tell her that even if it was the two of us that she didnt really open up to me. she tell sme that she doesnt up to just anyone. ( she only opend up to me 3 times , the only 3 times she told me she loved me and i beleived her ) and telling me that she starts telling that is how she is and that is how her parents are and that is how she was raised and all of this stuff.
she gets pissed.

now i will go head and tell you she just looks bad and i am worried about her. i want to be there for her... not really get her back but be there for her.... that is what i am calling the new style to DJ because i feel that i need to earn her trust back and get her to drop the wall and let me be there for her. i just dont know how to that.

how can i dj a girl to be a friend?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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TheRisingSon

Don Juan
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Unrelated question (or so it seems)... Why is your nick unixguy? Is that what is important to you? An OS that has a very loose definition?
 

Raven125

Senior Don Juan
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Jul 6, 2003
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She's a phsyco... Just let her deal with her own ****... If you leave her alone she'll work things out and there'll be no more fights. Simple.
 

Balanced

Don Juan
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Seems silly to want to go to LJBF land but a one way ticket is a ton of rapport (comfort).

By the way fights are good because they create attraction as long as you have a spine and stick up for yourself. not directed at unix just a general statement.
 

Don_Marko

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 23, 2004
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You sound like a fvcking nerd instead of a DJ... get back to boot camp!
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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